I looked at Brian sitting on my bed, waiting on me to get ready. We were going out with Nikki and Matt for a maid of honor/best man dinner with the couple. I didn't really feel like going, even though I knew I had to be there for my best friends. I was still a little hung over from the previous night, and I'm surprised that I'm up and functioning like I am.

I threw my hair up in a ponytail, before putting in my earrings and standing up, declaring that I was finished. Brian knew I was stalling, and we were already a couple minutes late. I called Brian up and told him that I couldn't drive today because of the head ache I had. I was still a little wobbly in my step, too.

I knew I was being a big baby about this whole thing. I've gone years just fine being Matt's friend. I didn't really understand how serious him and Nikki were about each other until last night, though. It was as if Nikki had said the magic words that broke the dam that was holding all my love that I had for her man and let it all pour in and flood my heart.

I stared out the window the whole ride, dreading the moment when I had to sit there for at least a couple of hours, watching them be all cute and in love. Brian's voice flooded through the quiet truck telling me that we had arrived. I sighed before stepping out, meeting Brian in the front of the car and walked in behind him.

Matt and Nikki were already at the table, talking amongst themselves, but stopped when they saw us coming. They smiled and stood up, hugging us. Brian quickly took the spot across from Nikki and I glared at him, making him smirk in return.

Dinner was passing by agonizingly slow, and I had to excuse myself to the bathroom before I exploded. I washed my hands once I got into the ladies room and stared into the mirror. There was a dull ache in my eyes, because all they wanted to to was cry but I wouldn't let them. I splashed some cool water on my face, hoping it would calm me down. Nikki walked in after that, smiling at me as she walked over to the sink beside me and started to wash her hands.

You alright? she asked, looking at me through the mirror. I smiled big and nodded.

Are you? I didn't know why I had asked, I knew she was more than alright.

Yeah, her smile wasn't as big as I expected it to be and I grabbed her by the shoulders, making her turn and look at me.

What is it? I asked, genuine concern washed over me. Even if she was marrying the love of my life, she was still my best friend. What's wrong?

It's nothing, really. she sighed, Just getting overwhelmed with all this talk about marriage.

I knew there was something she wasn't telling me, but I shrugged it off like she wanted me to. I didn't like that she wasn't telling me everything, but I felt that I probably would of hated it more if she actually told me the truth.

We walked back to the table together. I smiled at Brian and then looked at Matt to see him staring at Brian with a weird look on his face. I furrowed my eyebrows, but Brian shook his head. The rest of the dinner was spent with me forcing my smiles and laughs for the sake of everyone else. All I really wanted to do was go home and eat out my depression.

Brian dropped me off at my house when dinner was over, and I thanked him. He nodded and reminded me to call him if I ever needed anything. I told him I would, but I think we both knew that I probably wouldn't.

I walked into the house after unlocking the door and went straight to my bathroom. I stripped out of my nicer clothes, leaving them on the floor as I filled up the tub. I sat in the water, letting it burn my skin but I didn't care. I was numb at this point.

I stayed in the water until it grew cold, and even then I had to force myself to get out. I wrapped a towel around my body, but slide down the wall as I started to finally cry. It wasn't a hard sob where I couldn't breathe, but surprisingly just a couple of tears here and there.

I sat on the beach, watching the sun set in the California sky when Matt came and sat next to me. We didn't live very far from the beach, and we would often come out here just to get some air. It always amazed me when I came out here.

So beautiful, I looked over at Matt and smiled, watching him watch the sunset.

It is.

Matt had been home for a couple of months now, and I hated that I had to hide my friends from him. I felt like my time was divided between the both of them. I pulled my knees to my chest and rested my chin on them. Matt had causally threw his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his side as we watched in silence.

Matt, I want you to meet my best friend that's a girl.

Matt's head snapped to look at me, and I worried for a moment that he had given himself whiplash.

You're replacing me?!

I couldn't help but laugh at the cute shocked expression that was on his face. No, silly. I patted his arm for reassurance, but nothing changed. She's a female version of you. Which means I talk to her when I can't talk to you.

You can talk to me about everything! He pouted, obviously offended.

Really? I raised an eyebrow. Like, you'd have a conversation with me about my period, or about the latest fuck I've had?

He grimaced and shook his head before sighing. Alright, I get it. When do I meet her?

Now if you want? He nodded enthusiastically, and I pulled out my phone. I told her to meet us at the beach, I had a surprise for her.

It wasn't long before I could see her walking towards us in the distance, and the closer she got, the more surprised she looked. Once I finally introduced them, they were both on the shy side. I looked at Matt like he was crazy, he was never shy  especially with a girl. I could literally see the instant attraction between them and I could of kicked myself in the ass. As much as I had grown in love with Matt over the past couple of months, I saw all chances of there being an us explode right in front of my face.