On 24th of December we were all at Jimmy's place. There were all of the guys plus their wives and pretty much everybody that had something to do with the band. We were having a family dinner there because Jimmy had the biggest house and we all fit in there. It was already dark and cool outside but the atmosphere inside was amazing. Everybody got along really well. The food was great, the drinks were great, the people were great.

After we finished eating we made our way to the living room and got more comfortable on the couches. It was great seeing everybody so happy. There was a lot of smiling and laughter and it just was a really great night. And what made it even better was that the next morning I would get to open all of the presents that had been screaming my name under our Christmas tree for ages!

”We would like to announce something,” Matt said as he stood up. Val got up, too, and soon everybody was looking at them.

”We're going to have a baby!” Val exclaimed and all of the ladies, except for me, screamed and rushed to hug her. I had never really like Val and now I liked her a little bit less. How was it fair that she got to be pregnant and I didn't?

”Congratulations, man,” Brian said and shook Matt's hand.

Matt's face was glowing as he wrapped his arm around his wife's waist and pulled her into a big kiss. I wanted to bury myself under all the pillows that were on the couch. I wanted to disappear from the world. It wasn't fair that everybody else got to be so happy and I didn't. It was like a kick in the teeth.

”I'm going outside,” I muttered to Brian before quickly rushing out to the backyard.

I sat down on the porch and wrapped my arms around myself as the freezing breeze reached me. I kept staring into the darkness until somebody sat down next to me. I looked to my side and saw that it wasn't Brian. It was Jimmy.

”Hey,” he said quietly.

”Hey.”

”Brian told me what's going on between the two of you. And... I'm not good at this stuff but if there's anything I want you to know it's that you don't deserve this. You deserve to have everything you want, you deserve to have a baby. But what you don't seem to understand is that you're ruining your relationship. I've never seen my best friend so broken. He doesn't know what to do with you, Sophia,” Jimmy told me.

”Well what do you want me to do?”

”I don't know. But you have to do something. You can't just live your life like this,” he said.

”I'm really lost,” I admitted finally, ”I feel like I'm in a very dark place in my life.”

”But everybody is here for you. We all want to help you.”

”I know that but this is hard. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to face. It's hard because everybody else lives their perfect lives and gets what they want and I don't. And I know I shouldn't be so upset about it but it just isn't fair.”

”It's going to be alright. Everything will be just fine,” he told me quietly and pulled me into a big hug.

As soon as Brian and I got home, I went straight to bed without saying a word and fell asleep. I woke up the next morning to the sound of Brian talking on the phone with somebody.

”Yeah, I just think we're going to open the presents now... We can come over later tonight. Huh? Yeah, she's just a bit... I don't know, she's not okay. Yeah, okay, see you.” Brian stopped talking and sighed. I opened my eyes and looked at him, letting him know I was awake.

”Who was it?” I mumbled.

”It was my mom.”

”What did you two talk about?”

”She just wanted to know how you're doing and if we could go over tonight,” he said.

”Uh huh, alright.”

”Do you want to?”

”What?”

”Do you want to go over?”

”Yeah, why not,” I mumbled. We looked at each other for a while, neither of us saying anything. Then he leaned closer to kiss my cheek quickly.

”You know how much I love you, right?” he whispered.

”Yes.”

”Good. Now let's go get some breakfast and open the presents,” he told me.

I couldn't help but put a smile on my face and get out of bed. It was Christmas, my favourite season of the year. If anything, that was a great reason to smile.

”Did you know that Val was pregnant before last night?” I asked Brian as we sat in the kitchen.

He froze for a moment, obviously realizing that the conversation wouldn't become pleasant for either of us.

”Uh... Well, yeah,” he admitted and nodded.

”Why didn't you tell me?”

”Because I feel like I'm walking on thin ice all the time. I have to be careful of what I say around you,” he told me.

”I'm not trying to start a fight or anything. I just would've wanted to know about it from you. I could've prepared myself for it,” I mumbled.

”It's about time you realize that people get pregnant all the time. It's not like they can't be pregnant because you can't,” he said, ”I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just honest.”

”You're ruining my Christmas, Brian.”

”No. You're ruining it. You're doing this to yourself,” he told me.

”Fine, then.”

”Don't get angry. You brought this up, you don't get to be mad at me.”

”I'm not mad at you.”

”Yeah, whatever.”

”Exactly. Whatever.”

”Do you still want to open the presents with me?” he asked.

”Yes...”

Brian and I sat down around the Christmas tree and then looked at each other. There were exactly five presents which meant that either of us had bought three and the other one only two. And I knew for a fact that I had only bought two presents, one for myself and one for Brian. Which meant that Brian had either bought all of the three that were left for him, or two for him and one for me or two for me and one for him. Or all three for me which would've been nice, of course.

”I would've thought there would be only two presents,” I admitted to him.

”Maybe somebody's been a good girl this year,” Brian murmured and winked at me.

Even if we had been having an argument a few moments ago, he knew how to make me smile right after. I laughed and grabbed a big present box that had my name on top of it.

”I know I didn't buy that,” Brian said as he watched as I opened it.

There were some clothes for me, from myself. Mostly just basic stuff like shirts and socks and underwear.

”What a lame present,” Brian laughed as I put everything away.

”Well at least this is stuff that I really need,” I said and shrugged.

”Let's see, I'm going to open this one,” he said and picked a present that he had apparently bought for himself. I watched as he opened it and pulled out a really nice watch from the small box.

”Wow, this is really nice, I wonder who bought it for me!” he exclaimed, pretending to be touched by how nice it was and surprised that somebody had bought it for him.

”That is really nice, though,” I admitted, ”Was it expensive?”

”Now that's for me to know and for you to never find out,” he said and winked at me, ”Okay, your turn.”

”See? This is kind of fun, isn't it? Christmas isn't so bad after all,” I told him as I grabbed a small box from the floor.

I opened it and saw a golden watch which looked very much like the one Brian had gotten for himself.

”Are these... Are these the same, yours and mine?” I asked, ”God, Brian, this is really, really nice!”

”I know. That's why I got matching ones. Now we can be cool together,” he told me.

Then he started opening his last present which was from me. And, as lame and boring as it was, I had only gotten him the newest version of iPad. It had been the only thing I thought he had use for but I thought it was a lame gift because it wasn't something that came from the heart.

”Thanks, babe!” he exclaimed and reached closer to kiss my cheek. His eyes were glowing as he looked at it for a moment. Apparently it had been a good present.

I grabbed the very last present from under the christmas tree and looked at it for a moment. It didn't have a name on it but I had been sure it was from Brian to me.

”Whose is this?” I asked and held it up.

”I don't know.”

”Well, you bought it, didn't you?”

”No, it was Santa,” he told me. He tried to keep a serious face and I rolled my eyes at his lame joke.

”Do you want to open this?” I asked and offered the little box to him.

”No. You go ahead.”

I got a little excited as I started opening the present. My face fell when I saw what was inside of it. I was about to say something when Brian opened his mouth.

”Don't get mad, now – ”

”Why did you buy a pregnancy test?” I asked with my wide eyes.

”Because I talked with my mom the other day and she said that you... And don't get angry at me, now, but she said that you looked a bit chubbier and like you might be pregnant,” he said quietly, ”And you've been acting like a complete asshole for too long. There has to be a reason for that. Besides, when was your last period?”

”Don't you think I'd know if I was pregnant?” I muttered, ”And I'm not any chubbier, thanks very much.”

”But you are, aren't you? You just don't want to admit it. And I hope to God you are pregnant because if not, all hell will break loose. So, please, let's try this one last time. Please, Sophia.”

”Fine,” I muttered, ”But this is the last test I'm taking. I've peed on enough sticks already.”

”Great. Thanks, babe,” he said with a smile, ”I'm sure that we will make it this time!”

”You better be right about this,” I told him.

”I am, trust me. So... Are you going to do the test?”

”What, now?”

”Yes, now.”

”Eh... Fine,” I sighed and got up on my feet.

I started wandering to the nearest toilet and as I pulled down my pants and sat down on the toilet seat, I was hoping for the best but expecting the worst. Yikes.