Through All the Dust

“Babe?” I called into the house as I ushered Marge and my aunt inside. “Brian?”
No answer.
“Hm,” I huffed in thought, turning back to my guests. “Who’s staying upstairs and who’s staying down?”
“I’ll stay downstairs,” my aunt said. “If that’s perfectly alright with Margarete.”
She shrugged.
“Marge, you remember where the guest room is, right?” I asked as I picked up my aunt’s bags.
“Yeah, I’m good,” she smiled, grabbing her own things and heading up the stairs.
My aunt was looking around curiously, “Your home is beautiful, Blair.”
“Thanks,” I smiled. “Your room is this way.”
I led her through the office and into our secondary guest room. We hardly ever used it, but it was a handy thing to have for occasions like this. I dropped her bags into the corner.
“Did you want a tour?” I volunteered.
She smiled a little, “Maybe in a while. I’d very much like to lay down if that’s alright. It was a long flight.”
“Sure,” I nodded once. “If you need anything, just let me know.”
It was weird to have her in my house. She’d never come out—not even when she said she would. But she had come…and I was glad.
I grabbed my cigarettes from my jacket pocket and made my way out back. A Brian was lounging in our patio chair, Matt and Zacky in the other chairs. They greeted me happily when they caught sight of me.
I lit my smoke, “How’s it going?”
“Good,” Matt answered with an awkward head bob. “Working on some stuff for the album.”
“So there is going to be an album?” I asked, a little shocked.
They all exchanged glances.
Zacky shrugged, “We’re definitely toying with the idea.”
“Good,” I said seriously. “I’m really glad to hear that.”
“Yeah?” Matt asked. “Do you think the fans…”
I nodded sharply, “Yes. And I also think Jimmy would be bummed if you guys stopped.”
Brian looked deep in thought; he was hardly conscious at all for this exchange. I climbed into his lap, wrapping an arm around his neck; this caught his attention.
“Hi,” I grinned.
“Hey,” he smiled, looking from my eyes to my lips.
“I will say though,” Matt continued on, “if one more fucking drummer calls us up and asks to take Jimmy’s spot…I’m going to fucking lose it.”
It felt like the air had been knocked out of my chest.
“What?” I managed.
Zacky furrowed his brows at me, “We get calls every day.”
“What?” I asked again, totally and completely confused. “From who?”
He and Matt shrugged.
I looked at Brian who was looking like a deer caught in the headlights.
“Why didn’t you mention that?”
He sighed deeply, “I don’t like to talk about it.”
“Okay…” I cooed.
“We had an idea though,” Matt said excitedly. “Maybe Blair can weigh in—”
Brian interrupted, “It isn’t a concrete plan. Don’t burden Blair with this shit.”
“It’s not burdening me,” I argued softly. “What’s the idea?”
Matt put his hands up, bowing out. Brian could certainly get into moods…and we were all usually smart enough not to push our luck. He was clearly in a mood.
But I didn’t care.
“We were thinking of asking Mike Portnoy to play on the album,” Zacky told me.
“Dream Theater’s Mike Portnoy?” I double-checked.
Zacky nodded.
I looked at Brian, who, despite his reluctance to bring me into the situation, looked eager to see my reaction.
“Oh my god,” I choked a little, pulling my hands to my chest. “I love that idea.”
“Told you!” Zacky sighed, relieved.
Matt finally spoke, “We figured you might…’cause, ya know, Brian filled in—”
“Yeah, I got it,” I cut him off quickly. “It’s a perfect plan. I love it, really. Jimmy would have been so thrilled.”
The guys nodded respectively to themselves.
I turned to Brian, a little smirk tugging at my lips, “So, you might want to crash with Matty for tonight.”
“What? Why?” Brian asked, puzzled.
I gestured to the house with my head, “Marge is in there…and so is my aunt.”
“That’s today?” he gasped. “Shit.”
“Caroline’s napping,” I told him. “But Marge is around. So…you might want to duck out before the wicked one awakens.”
“Your wife is so cool,” Matt grinned. “Victoria would make me entertain.”
“My wife is cool,” Brian smirked, planting a sloppy kiss on my cheek.
“I’m not your wife yet,” I teased. “There’s still time for me to back out.”
“My wedding first,” Matt reminded us. “Speaking of, when are we going to do a bachelor party. Isn’t that your guys’ job?”
Zacky grinned, “We’re thinking Vegas.”
“Victoria will be pissed,” Matt thought aloud with a serious smirk. “Let’s do it.”
I patted Brian’s chest as I smashed my cigarette into the ash tray with my other hand, climbing out of Brian’s lap and managing to get onto my feet.
“You guys plan that,” I laughed. “on your way to Matty’s.”
“Good looking out,” Brian smirked, standing and grabbing my face with both hands.
“Oh, Mr. Haner, you do know how to woo me,” I teased as he pushed his lips to mine.
I reveled in his touch; eternally craving more. I moaned into him a little, almost forgetting there were other people around. Zacky cleared his throat.
We pulled apart, smiling like idiots at one another. Didn’t matter how much time had passed, he still could get me going like the very first day I met him.
I followed the guys into the house, where Marge was sitting on my couch with a magazine. It had my stupid face on it.
“Oh, Brian!” she gasped when she saw my man.
She got up and ran to him, wrapping him in her small arms. He hugged her back, the most adorable smile on his face.
“How are you, Marge? Flight was okay?”
She nodded, “It’s been a lovely day. We had lunch.”
I was relieved when Marge skipped over our adventure—it was something I wanted to tell Brian about…but in time. And not when we had so many guests in our home.
“I hope Blair treated you,” Brian winked.
She nodded, “You know our Blair.”
“What’s on the agenda for your visit?” Brian asked curiously as Zacky and Matt headed for the door.
“Tomorrow is dress shopping day!” she beamed happily. “She’s going to be such a beautiful bride.”
Brian smiled, “She’s always beautiful.”
“Weren’t you leaving?” I snickered. “The guys are waiting. Marge, he has to go.”
“You’re leaving?” she frowned.
Brian sighed, “Yeah, we’ve got some Avenged stuff to take care of. I’ll see you tomorrow for dinner though.”
“Okay,” Marge pouted.
Brian kissed me again quickly, “Love you,” he whispered into my ear.
I winked in response.
He followed the guys out, who waved sheepishly in lieu of a goodbye. The house was quiet again the second they lift. Marge sank back into the couch, returning to her magazine. I pulled up a cushion, staring at the wall because…well, I had nothing else to look at.
“He’s a good man,” Marge smirked from behind her magazine. “your Brian.”
I nodded, “He is.”
“I couldn’t have picked a better partner for you,” she told me seriously, looking at me from the corners of her eyes.
I smiled at her, “Me neither.”
“Look at him,” she gushed, flipping the magazine over so I could see it.
There were pictures of Brian and I picking out cakes at a local bakery. He’d hardly slept the night before and it showed through the bags under his beautiful eyes. But he looked happy, and I looked deeply in love. Sometimes I was grateful for the paparazzi; they offered me perspective on my life and my love that I wouldn’t have otherwise.
Being caught off guard was the best way to see true emotions revealed.
All there was on that page was true love—the kind I had faith would last forever.
“Are you excited to try on dresses?” Marge asked me happily as she pulled the magazine back under her nose.
“No,” I scoffed. “But I’m excited to hang out with you.”
She smiled, “I love you too, Blair.”

Notes

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