Just Before You Go

My shift started out as chaos. Something must have been in the air because it was packed from the moment I arrived and it did not relent for the following six hours. I was exhausted by eleven; and disappointed because Jimmy hadn’t come around.
I guess I should have anticipated that, given that I’d rejected him twice in one night. I wouldn’t have come around either.
“Why do you keep looking at the door, huh?” Jenny grinned knowingly. “Expecting someone?”
“No,” I lied, blushing.
“They don’t come until late,” she told me, her eyebrows raised.
She looked at the clock and then at the door. She cackled maniacally.
“Speak of the devil,” she taunted as she passed me with a bottle of JD.
In came Jimmy and, to my surprise, a girl. Brian and a red-head came in behind them, immediately scanning the room for a table. Because fate hates me, the only table was directly in front of the bar. Because the universe hates me, they sat there.
“Oh,” Jenny said once she’d spotted the girl with Jimmy. “I’ve never seen him with a woman.”
I pretended like I didn’t care. I threw myself back into my shift, serving up drink after drink; stopping only to bring empties to the back and wash the glassware quickly. When I came back from the kitchen, the girl was standing at the bar.
I rolled my eyes but I knew I’d have to serve her.
“What can I get for you?” I asked in my friendliest voice.
She smiled at me. Gross.
“Vodka tonic,” she said—not asked.
I dumped the vodka into the cup and sloppily added the mix. It spilled a little as I slid it to her. She made a face at me but took it anyway.
“Put it on Brian’s tab,” she told me coolly before returning to Jimmy.
He was staring at me, though. I waved and continued on with my life. This was why I didn’t get involved with men. They were so fickle.
I wasn’t interested in being someone’s flavor of the week. If I wanted that, I would have hit up Brian when I’d had the chance.
I found myself watching their table. It was clear that I was jealous but I was self-aware to know that I had no reason to be.
“You’re going to give yourself a migraine,” Jenny teased me.
“Shut up,” I grumbled.
And then the girl kissed him. That was enough for me. I retreated into the kitchen to go and scrub at some pots.
“You know that’s not your job,” Shaun called to me from the stove.
“I can’t look at people anymore,” I groaned. “I need a break.”
“You should take up smoking,” he joked. “Perfect for breaks.”
“No thanks.”
I’d managed to hide out in the kitchen until almost closing. Jen had come and dragged me back into the bar. She gave me shit for hiding but let it go fairly quick.
“He didn’t kiss her back,” she said as I started to wipe the counter down. “Just so you know.”
“Who?” I played dumb.
She laughed, “She left in a huff. Now it’s just the three of them.”
I looked up to find Jimmy alone. Brian and the red-head were playing tonsil hockey, oblivious to the world around them. I found myself jealous again—but not of the woman. I wanted that. I wanted to be carefree enough to make out in a bar. I wanted to want somebody that bad.
I’d had exactly one serious relationship and it had ended badly. We’d dated for three years, off and on. He wasn’t a great example of a good boyfriend and I’d been left a little jaded.
“Do you mind if I take off?” I asked then, I needed distance. “Dishes are done, it’s almost closing anyway…”
“Go ahead,” Jen laughed. “But you can’t bail every time he’s here. I mean it.”
“Just this once,” I nodded.
I grabbed my things and headed for the door without looking at anyone. I kept my head low, like I could escape unseen.
Once I was in my car with the door shut, I let out a loud sigh. What was happening to me? Maybe I should have just accepted Jimmy’s offer. Maybe then he wouldn’t have brought some girl to my work…not like he owed me anything. I shook my head at myself.
I turned the key to start my ignition and…nothing happened. No lights, no clicking. Nothing. I tried again.
Nothing.
“Fuck,” I muttered to myself, forcing myself back into the night air to investigate.
I don’t know why I bothered to look under the hood; it isn’t like any of it meant anything to me. I wasn’t mechanically inclined in the slightest.
I slammed it back down with another grumble under my breath. I locked the doors and made my way to the street to try and hail a cab. There was no way I was going back in there.
A car pulled up to my right and started to panic me when I’d realized it wasn’t moving.
“Need a ride?” a familiar voice sang.
I looked to find Jimmy grinning at me.
“I’m okay,” I lied awkwardly.
“Come on,” he encouraged dramatically. “Get in. I promise I won’t murder you…tonight.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind?” I asked, despite my internal objections.
“Not at all,” he smiled. “Get the fuck in here!”
I walked around the back and climbed into the passenger seat. The car was warm and it smelled like Jimmy. I was starting to miss the cymbal monkey.
“So where are we going?” he asked as he pulled the car out into the street.
“Fourteenth Street,” I answered quickly.
“K.”
It was quiet as Jimmy drove us up the road. I was trying to think of something to say—anything—but I had nothing.
“So are you from around here?” Jimmy asked then.
“I’m from Minnesota,” I told him.
“What?” he laughed. “Minnesota? You’re practically a Canadian!”
“I can assure you I am not a Canadian,” I scoffed.
“What brings you to California? Got tired of the cold Canadian life?”
“I’m not Canadian!” I laughed. “But I moved here with my parents.”
“You live with your parents?” he asked weirdly.
I hesitated, “No.”
He turned a corner, “Your parents cool?”
“Yeah,” I shrugged. “I guess.”
“Nice.”
“We’re not good at this whole small talk thing, huh?” I smiled.
He smirked, “No, you make me nervous.”
“Nervous? Why?” I asked, genuinely confused.
“Because you’re beautiful,” he said like I should have known.
I considered getting into the no, you’re beautiful conversation but decided against it. Instead, I asked about his band and his drumming. He told me about how he got started and the toy kit he’d learned on. He’d asked if I’d heard them, I’d told him no. But I promised that I would.
He pulled into my driveway and I was a little disappointed.
“Well thanks,” I said awkwardly. “You know, for the ride.”
He just smiled.
I was just getting out of the car when I made the impulsive decision to not build up anymore regrets. There was nothing wrong with making new friends, right?
“Hey, uh, did you want to come in?” I asked.
He looked completely taken aback. Probably because I’d turned him down several times and now I was baiting him to come into my home.
“Another time,” I said awkwardly when he didn’t answer.
I shut the door and started up my driveway. And then his engine cut and I heard his door slam. I caught myself smiling.
“Hey! Wait up!” he called to me, jogging to catch up.
We went inside. He looked around my tiny home with a bushy tail.
“Nice place,” he told me.
I smiled, “Thanks. I know it’s tiny but it’s a good place for one.”
He just nodded.
“Make yourself comfortable,” I told him awkwardly. “Do you want a cup of coffee?”
I wanted to make myself busy. Anything to keep myself at an arms-length from this gorgeous man. I was sort of regretting inviting him inside…I didn’t really know what to do with myself. It had been a long time since I’d had a man in my home. I wasn’t sure what the proper protocol was.
“At two in the morning?” he smirked. “Fuck yeah, I do.”
I retreated into the kitchen, which was more like a cubby hanging off of my bedroom—which was hanging off of my living room. I filled the maker with water and scooped the potent grounds into the filter.
“Do your parents live nearby?” Jimmy asked curiously from my couch.
“Close-ish,” I replied simply. “They’re a twenty minute drive from here.”
I made my way to the couch as the coffee brewed loudly in the kitchen. He was holding his legs with both hands, I wondered if he was as nervous around me as I was around him.
For whatever reason, that relaxed me a little.
“Do you live far?” I asked, trying to make conversation organically.
He shook his head, “I’m just up the street.”
“No way,” I smiled.
“Yeah! Five minute walk—tops.”
“So if I ever need to borrow a cup of sugar, you’re my guy?” I joked.
He grinned, “Sure thing.”
“Do you live alone?” I asked.
He nodded, “Yeah, but all of my friends live so close that sometimes it doesn’t feel that way.”
“That must be nice,” I sort of sighed. “Having friends close by. I don’t really have many friends here.”
“I’ll be your friend,” he smirked. “I’ll be your best friend.”
For a second I’d heard it as boyfriend and I’d blushed. I blushed harder when my echoic hearing corrected me.
“Do you have time for friends?” I teased. “Aren’t you some ultra-cool rock star?”
He flinched his face in an awkward sort of way, “I don’t know about that.”
I got off of the couch and opened up my desktop.
“Best song of yours,” I said, looking over my shoulder to peer at him.
He squinted one eye in deep thought before stating, “Trashed and Scattered.”
I typed it in and it immediately boomed through my speakers. I sunk back into the couch, half-listening to the song and half-watching Jimmy. He drummed along on his knees.
“It’s kind of punk,” I said weirdly. “I thought you were metal.”
He gasped, “This is metal.”
“I don’t know about that,” I mocked.
“You have so much to learn,” he teased, leaning a little closer to me.
I heard the coffee stop brewing and I was immediately fleeing to the kitchen. He was freaking me out—not in an ‘I need an adult’ kind of way, but rather that I was being absolutely flooded with desire. By leaning in closer to me, he’d managed to heat my entire torso. I couldn’t take the heat.
“What do you take in your coffee?” I called.
He called back, “Nothing.”
I brought two steaming cups back into the living room with me and set them onto the coffee table as the song seemed to slowly wrap up. It was good enough that I hadn’t wanted to turn it off. Though, maybe that was partially because the drummer was sitting on my couch. I wondered if I’d liked it had I not met Jimmy.
Probably not.
“So, obviously you don’t like metal,” Jimmy smiled. “What do you like? What’s your favorite band?”
“The Beatles,” I said without having to think about it.
“Good choice.”
I nodded, “John or Paul?”
“John,” he said simply.
“Paul!” I argued.
“No,” Jimmy groaned. “Just no. You’re way off base if you think that McCartney outranks Lennon. Or you’re cracked in the head.”
“Maybe both,” I smiled warmly. “But Macca is still better.”
“Can we just agree that they were better as a team and never talk about this again?” he grinned deviously. “I was just starting to like you.”
My face flushed again.
“Deal,” I smiled.
I tried to take a sip of coffee to occupy my lips to keep me from doing something ballsy. But it was piping hot and I immediately burned my top lip, jolting from the shock and spilling burning hot coffee into my lap.
“For fucks sakes,” I grumbled, tossing my cup back onto the table. “That’s not hot at all.”
“Are you okay?” Jimmy asked, trying his hardest not to laugh.
I frowned dramatically at him, “I’m burned.”
“I see that,” he chuckled. “Let me see.”
He moved in closer to my face and I felt my spine start tingling. This time, I didn’t run away. I let him move closer and closer until he was less than an inch from my lips.
“Looks good to me,” he grinned.
You’re boring, I could hear Derek’s voice echoing in my head. Maybe I was—I rarely took risks, I never had one-night stands, I didn’t go on trips or adventures, I’d smoked a joint exactly one time in my life, I’d never smoked a cigarette. I didn’t do anything categorically dangerous or interesting. My life was routine and, I guess, boring.
“You think so?” I asked quietly, careful not to break the moment.
“Mhm,” he grumbled.
But then he pulled away. I was disappointed. Maybe I’d been packing about nothing. If he’d have kissed me, I’d have let him. Not only because I was decidedly not going to be boring but because I really wanted him to.
“I’m going to go change,” I told him sheepishly, my legs were soaked through with caffeine.
I disappeared into the bathroom with a pair of sweatpants. I’d just pulled them up when I heard Another Day pouring out of my speakers and filling my tiny house. I smiled.
“I thought we didn’t like Paul McCartney,” I teased as I came out of the bathroom.
Jimmy was standing. I’d almost forgotten how tall he was.
“This one is good,” he smirked.
“They’re all good,” I retorted, plopping back down onto the couch.
“Pipes of Peace,” he said with his eyebrows raised.
I laughed, “Okay, maybe not all of them.”
“Have you ever seen him live?” Jimmy asked as he collapsed down next to me.
I shook my head with a pout, “Nope. I’ve never seen anyone.”
“You’ve never been to a concert?” he gawked.
“No,” I blushed.
“Why the fuck not?” he laughed in disbelief. “That’s crazy.”
“I’ve never felt the need,” I said awkwardly. “I honestly don’t have a reason for you. I’ve just never been.”
“We should get you cultured,” he grinned. “You can’t die without seeing a concert.”
I smiled, “Sure.”
He took a sip of the coffee and I was annoyed when it didn’t burn him. My lip was still stinging from my first sip, I was not eager to test it out again.
“How long have you been in Huntington?” he asked curiously, gently placing the cup back onto the table.
I memorized the cup he was using and made a mental note to never wash it again.
“Two months,” I said. “Give or take.”
“That’s it?” he gasped. “You’re a Huntington virgin!”
“Is that a thing?” I giggled.
“It must be; you are one.”
“So what you’re saying,” I said slowly, “is that I need to get fucked—Huntington style.”
Jimmy’s face turned a slight tinge of pink. It was adorable. For someone who looked so intimidating, he was actually quite sweet. I’d shocked him a little with my bluntness.
“I guess that’s what I’m saying,” he finally laughed.
“And what, pray tell, does that entail?” I asked, finally drinking my coffee.
No burns.
“Johnny’s Bar,” he told me with a serious head nod. “And the ocean, obviously—but I’m sure you’ve been to the ocean by now.”
I looked down a little. His jaw dropped.
“What’s wrong with you?” he cackled. “Are you demented or what?”
“I’m boring,” I shrugged.
“No way,” he argued playfully. “Nothing boring about you.”
I took the compliment with thanks. Derek had really gotten to me with his comment. Maybe it was a silly thing to get worked up over but it wasn’t exactly a term of endearment. I decided I was stable; not boring.
“Do you work tomorrow?” he asked me then.
I shook my head no.
“Perfect,” he grinned. “I’m taking you to the beach.”
“You go to the beach?” I half-gasped.
“What is that supposed to mean?” he laugh cheekily.
I hesitated, “You look like you just crawled out of Marilyn Manson’s dungeon.”
He looked at me wide-eyed for a second before he burst into a fit of laughter. I was relieved to find he had a sense of humor.
“That’s pretty good,” he said between chuckles. “But even goth kids can swim, Aria.”
“Learn something new every day,” I smiled.
“I should get out of your hair,” he smiled back. “Thanks for the coffee.”
“Thanks for the ride,” I said back as he stood to his feet.
“Any time,” he smirked. “See you tomorrow.”
And he was gone.

Notes

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