Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

Matt smiled at Ellie from the driver’s seat of his car. She was passed out against the window, with Berkeley curled up at her feet. Their travel had been unnecessarily stressful, and simply being in the presence of her puppy put Ellie at ease. The same went for the dog, who had been so excited to be reunited with Ellie after their just short of 6-hour flight that he had peed with excitement the second he was out of his crate. Matt was glad his friend was getting some rest and was impressed with how she had handled the issues that arose while they were trying to book their flights. He made a mental note to call Ellie next time the band had issues with their travel arrangements. Ellie knew which cards to play to get what she wanted, and when to walk away from a futile attempt.

The pair had difficulties with Delta Airlines over the last minute addition of her dog as a “passenger” on a flight that day. Ellie was livid, since she knew very well that the dog was too large to be in the cabin, so she couldn’t understand why putting his crate below the plane was such an issue. Particularly since neither she nor Matt had baggage that was going under the plane, just their carry-ons. When the on-site manager for the corporation told Ellie she would have to wait until the next morning to fly to Los Angeles, she snatched her father’s credit card and her driver’s license from the hands of the desk attendant and marched over to the line at the next kiosk: United.

United Airlines was no help either, as they could only offer flights that had connections, making their travel time closer to 8 hours rather than 6. Had the airline offered a flight that left earlier than 8 pm that evening, Ellie may have considered booking those tickets but moved on to the next airline company.

Finally, Ellie made her way to the desk at American Airlines, where she exasperatedly threw down her father’s card with her identification and told the attendant that she was to put her on the next plane to Los Angeles since her father had just suffered a life-threatening medical event. The attendant barely blinked as she began to search for availability for the pair on an upcoming flight. Ellie had to say goodbye to Berkeley in that very moment, as the plane they were to board was taking off in the next half hour. Boarding passes in hand, Matt and Ellie sprinted through the crowded airport to their gate. They arrived in time for the pre-boarding call and had no issues further on their flight.

Matt had never experienced a flight drag on for such a long time. Granted, the few times he had flown that were recent to his memory were once with the band, which had been a riot simply because he was cooped up for hours with his best friends, or with his family for a short vacation, where his excitement to be travelling somewhere new took over his focus on the time it was taking to travel.

This time around, though, he had been sat beside Ellie, who barely said a word the entire flight. She didn’t sleep, so Matt forced himself to stay awake with her, though she didn’t indulge his presence with any conversation. Matt knew better than to press his friend for any form of conversation. She needed the time to gather her thoughts and regain focus before she met with her father again.

Ellie began to stir as Matt pulled off the 405 to head in towards Huntington Beach. She adjusted her position slightly and fell back asleep, snoring softly as Matt pushed the speed limits to bring his friend home quicker. When he reached their neighbourhood, he began to slow his driving. With his right hand, he reached over to shake Ellie’s shoulder gently to wake her up. She grumbled slightly, before taking a moment to straighten herself up, fixing her sunglasses on her face and tucking her dark stray hairs behind her ears. Matt visibly jumped when Ellie spoke, which went unnoticed by her as she trained her gaze on the buildings passing by.

“I’m fucking scared, Matt,” Ellie’s comment left Matt speechless. He couldn’t recall when his friend would have made such an admission of emotions to him in all the years that they had known each other. Ellie was always the one to keep a hard exterior and save face. Matt realized that they had barely even discussed Zack at any depth past the fact that Matt wasn’t ecstatic that Ellie saw something in his friend that she didn’t see in him. Matt had no plans to ever admit it out loud, but he often found himself wondering what life would have been like had he and Ellie continued to see each other after that weekend her father was away on business.

“You know I’m always here for you. You know that, right Ellie?”

She nodded, still focusing her attention on their passing surroundings. Matt caught the slight movement out of the corner of his eye. The sat in silence for a moment longer, neither really knowing what to say in such an odd moment.

“Promise me you’ll leave your bedroom window open a crack? I might need to sneak in if this doesn’t go well.” Matt laughed at the thought of his friend sneaking into his room at 22 like she had when they were in their teens. Matt’s parents had even made Ellie a key to prevent her from climbing in through the windows, but she rarely used it.

“Of course I will,” Matt continued to laugh as he finally turned onto his street. It felt comfortable, yet unfamiliar to have Ellie in the car with him as he pulled into his parents’ driveway. He shifted his eyes to the next house over. The exterior hadn’t changed in years, but it somehow looked different to Matt. Perhaps it was just knowing that his best friend was going to be spending time there again that made things seem so unusual.

Ellie hopped out of his car without another word. She quickly snagged Berkeley’s leash as the puppy leaped out of the car behind her. She smiled as he sniffed around before relieving himself with a leg up against the shrub that divided the two properties.

“I’ll leave the dog crate beside our garage, so you can grab it whenever you need it,” Matt smiled as he passed Ellie the handle of her small suitcase. She sent her friend a small smile as a thank you, fearing she would start to cry if she spoke. Matt leaned over to kiss his friend on the cheek before petting Berkeley and walking towards his parent’s front door.


Ellie slowly walked towards the front door of her childhood home. She took her time and allowed for Berkeley to explore as she procrastinated facing her father again. She was so busy watching her puppy explore that she had no idea her father had come to the door. She hadn’t heard it open and had no idea that he watched her while he leaned against the doorframe for support. It was Berkeley who noticed the man first and took advantage of the loose lead on his leash to lunge forward towards the man. Her father chuckled as the dog reached the end of the slack and abruptly flew backward.

Ellie froze as she flicked her eyes upwards to make eye contact with her father. The sight in front of her was terrifying. His hair had greyed significantly over the years, and though the man had once been physically imposing, he had never been, by any means, overweight. The man who stood before Ellie now was a fragment of the man he was in his prime. His clothes hung off of his frame and dark circles were prominent under his eyes. Ellie felt her body betraying the years of anger she held against the man as she all but ran up the front steps to hug him. As much as she thought his anger had killed her over the years, seeing him in such a fragile state was a million times worse.

“I’m glad to see you came home,” her father said, taking the time to pull his daughter in tighter to prolong the hug. Ellie nodded feverishly against his shoulder, unable to find words that seemed appropriate in that moment. Ellie really had a list of questions she wanted to be answered. She spent the entirety of her flight to LA determining what her conditions on this trip were. Undoubtedly, she was here to support her father in this time of poor health, but that didn’t mean she was going to forget the last four years of radio silence between them. Ellie was, for once, going to heed Katie’s advice, and take this time to repair her relationship, with her father at least, once and for all.

“How are you doing?” Ellie finally asked, as her father pulled away and gingerly knelt down to give Berkeley the attention that he was desperately seeking. The man before her sighed, which she knew was due to his annoyance at being asked a question about his health. He had always been such a private man and despite the fact he had requested his daughter to come back to see him, he still wasn’t thrilled about indulging in his health issues.

“Come on in and get settled first, Ellie. I’m sure you could use a drink and something to eat after such a long day.” Ellie didn’t argue. Instead, she unhooked Berkeley from his leash once the front door was secured behind her. She was amazed that the interior of the house hadn’t changed. The neutral paint throughout the first floor was the same in colour, just retouched with a relatively fresh coat of paint. Her father’s favourite painting, an abstract piece by a local artist, was still hanging at the top first landing of the staircase, directly visible as soon as one walks into the house.

Berkeley took off to explore the house and Ellie called off a warning to her father about how good he has been of late with the house training, but she held some concerns over her pup being in a new environment. She was honestly surprised at her father’s carefree response, but shrugged it off and ascended the staircase.

Ellie laughed as she found herself skipping the third last step on the stairs. It was an old habit she picked up due to the fact that the step had a squeak loud enough that it always woke her father. She felt ridiculous falling back into her teenage habits as a 22-year-old guest in her childhood home, but she couldn’t help it.

However, when Ellie took in the sight of her old bedroom for the first time since she had moved out, she honestly did feel like a teenager again.

The posters of various bands that used to adorn her walls were nowhere to be seen. The walls had even been painted a neutral green colour to match the colour scheme of the rest of the house. Her bedspread had been changed to an impractical all-white theme, and the two photo frames that once held a picture of her with the guys and a photo of her and Zack had been replaced with one single frame with a professional photo from her high school graduation.

Ellie was angry. She was angry that she was, yet again, fighting tears. She was angry that her father thought so little of her personal identity that he felt it necessary to erase everything she had left behind. She was angry that he was trying to create an illusion of a picture perfect daughter who was out of state for school. All of this anger culminated into her anger for how he treated her over the last four years: shipping her off to school without a word over the course of her degree. Most of all, she was angry that her father still held such an emotional and manipulative grip over her.

Ellie took her time hanging and putting away the clothes that Matt had packed for her. She was actually impressed that he had been able to pack a selection of clothes that would be functional for the duration of her trip. She would have to thank him appropriately for being able to jump right back into being the best person she knew, despite the fact that she had ignored him for years. It was at that moment that Ellie realized that she had isolated herself from her friends in the same manner that she had learned from her father and how he treated her. 

And boy, did that really make her feel like shit.

So when Ellie finally made her way back downstairs, she felt no guilt about leaving the house at the sight of her father passed out on the couch with Berkeley curled up at his feet. She ran back upstairs only to grab a light cardigan to throw over top of the black tank she had been wearing that day as well as her wallet and phone.

As she made her way down the familiar streets, she pulled her phone from the back pocket of her jeans and sent a text invitation to meet her at Johnny’s, the group’s go-to bar from the days when they all relied on fake ID’s.

She smiled when she looked at the screen to see Zack’s name after hearing the incoming text notification.

“I’ll be there in 10."

Notes

Hey! A (somewhat) timely update! So she's back in California and her first interaction with her father is less than favourable. Is anyone surprised?

As always, thanks to you all for the support!
xx