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Take a Look At Yourself

Broken Dreams

I watched Carmen pace, wondering what she could possibly have to say to me. It was obvious that she had been abused. That was clear from the way she moved, from the way she acted. Whatever she had survived, I knew it would make me want to kill her father and his partner.

“Matt, you’re gonna look at me differently.” Her eyes met mine, tears sparkling in them.

I leaned back against the couch. We both knew that I would look at her differently. It just sort of happened that way after you told someone something about you. They could never go back to looking at you like how you wanted them to look at you. Things would always change.

“You and I both know that, Carmen. I will know something about you that very few people know about you. But, I will always respect you and care for you.” I stood up and held her to me. She sniffed and wrapped her arms around my waist.

“Okay, but you should sit down.” She waited until I had and then I watched her chew on her nails for a bit. “The first time they did it, I was sixteen. It was after one of my soccer games. The first time is still blurry. I remember walking into my father’s office and they were both there. Everything else is a blur other than the pain.

“The pain was… I can’t even describe it, Matt. What they did, they broke me. I receded into myself for weeks. My soccer skills declined, and my grades started to slip. That was the second time it happened. My father was pissed and said that bad girls get punished. He forced me into his office and made me suck his penis. I choked and gagged and I threw up. It was horrible. From then on out, the abuse happened every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Those were the days my father and Damian met in my father’s office.

“Damian was far more violent than my father. My father always apologized after, taking me up to my room. He would explain to my mother and brothers that I had fallen asleep in his office doing homework. He always said if they knew the truth, they would kick me out of the house. And like the naïve girl I was, I believed him.

“But Damian was the one that made the abuse all the more painful to endure. Usually, my father just shared me with him. Damian was gentler when it was just the two of them. But there were days that my father would let Damian have at me by himself. Those were the days I hated. Damian wouldn’t use condoms. He tore my vagina and ass so many times. My father had a doctor on his records. The doctor never said anything.

“It stopped though after one night… the day I graduated from high school. I was six months into eighteen, finally starting to fight back. The abuse was only once a week now because I had broken my father’s nose and had bitten Damian so hard, he required stitches. It got to where one of them had to hold me down and tie me up while the other had their way.

“Father let me have a graduation party at the house, celebrating my new take on life. Damian and Chad were there. Chad and I hated each other, always had. He thought I was the worst kind of person… I was smart and athletic and I always showed him up in class. I thought Chad was a dick… mostly that was overshadowed by what his father did to me.

“That night, Damian and my father brought me into the office. Chad was there. He looked so excited. I had never seen him with such a look of enjoyment before. It was the worst night of my life. I won’t go into too many details, but they took turns. They raped my ass, my vagina, and my mouth. It was hours on end. I missed most of the party. And when it was done, I was bleeding so profusely, they needed to take me to the emergency room. They paid off the doctors so no one reported anything.

“Once I was out of the hospital, my father said if I ever told anyone what he and Damian do, I would die. They would kill me.” Her eyes were dead as she looked over at me. It was like she had turned inside herself and was just reliving every moment.

I didn’t say anything. I just stood up and pulled her into my chest. We sat like that for a long time, just her letting it all out.

“I need to know what’s in that article.” Her blue eyes stayed red as she looked at me. “I have to, Matt.”
***************************************************************************************
Carmen paced outside the paper. We were both a little surprised when the editor had agreed to let us see him. It wasn’t until Zacky stepped outside and greeted us.

“Did you forget I was a journalism student, Sanders? I intern here. I found that article… it’s not pretty. They have sources for everything.” Zach turned to Carmen. “… I can’t figure out how they found out anything about you.” He handed her the article.

I read over her shoulder. Carmen Harrison, as we all know, was kicked off the soccer team. We learned that came down to the quarterback. But Harrison holds a dark secret. Next week, the team plays UCLA. One player in particular knows Harrison. Apparently, Harrison has had an abortion.

The article went on, but my eyes had stopped reading. There were pictures. Carmen’s eyes glazed over as she saw the picture. It was her leaving Planned Parenthood and the account of one of the doctors there. Clearly, they had violated HIIPA but it didn’t matter.

“Carmen?” Why hadn’t she told me this?

“IT’S NOT TRUE!” She slammed the paper on the bench and stormed into the editor’s office. I had no idea what was about to happen, but I wanted to see.

Notes

Sorry I've been MIA! I'm back though!

Comments

@overneaththepathofmisery
Awww glad to be back! I think I'll be doing weekly updates since I officially have my weekends back!

My Heri is back! *hugest giantest hearty eyes*

@violetshade
HIIII! I've missed you all! Yay gas money! Glad you are all moved down here and looking for job!

Oh don't worry, the boys will think of something.

AHHHH! SO GLAD YOU'RE BACK!!! Once I get a job I'll have gas money to come see youuuuuu!!! Good to hear your school and health is going well, I really hope that continues!
Also can't wait to see what the FUCK happens to her dad (hopefully something absolutely horrifyingly awful).

@HereticBlood6661 as sad as it makes me having you step away, I know that you will be back, and you can bet your ass I’ll still be, girl! I’m MORE upset about your poor health, honey. Do they have any ideas what’s causing your full body issues? Do they have a plan of attack for treatment? Don’t be a stranger! Sevenfold makes us family ;) <3 I’m wishing you luck with your Masters, I know they can be a a complete mind fuck. What are you doing your Masters in? Remember, YOU’VE GOT THIS! <3<3<3