Strength Of The World

The morning of December 28, Peyton woke up with a smile. She was going out with the girls later to plan a New Year’s party at Vengeance Manor, and she had been really excited about it. That was, until she heard what sounded like sniffles at the foot of the bed. “Babe?” She said groggily, sitting up so she could see her fiancée. He had his head in his hands, and he was crying. Peyton had seen Zack cry maybe a handful of times, so she knew this was serious. “Zack, what’s going on?” She asked, crawling to the end of the bed to sit beside him. Zack looked up at her with bloodshot eyes and grabbed her hands. “Baby. I have to tell you something and I’m gonna need you to not freak out, because you have to be calm for the baby.” “Zack, you’re scaring me. What the hell is going on?” She asked, voice wavering. A fresh set of tears started flowing out of his eyes as he whispered the two words she thought she would never hear: “Jimmy’s dead.”

Peyton was out of the car and running up Brian’s driveway before Zack had ever put it in park. She flung the door open and ran through the lower level of the house, looking for her brother. She finally found him, sitting in the living room with a glass of whiskey in his hand staring at the floor with tears flowing down his face. “Brian.” She whispered. His head shot up and he sat his glass down on the table. He stood up and walked toward her, every step he took she felt her heart break a little more. Once he finally reached her, he pulled her into his arms and she broke completely. Her legs went out from under her and she sobbed harder than she ever has before. Brian buried his face in her hair and cried along with her, his strength holding both of them up. “Peyton, you’ve got to calm down. You gotta breathe. This isn’t good for the baby.” He said softly into her hair. “I c-c-can’t” She stuttered, clinging to Brian like her life depended on it. “How do we live in a world without Jimmy?” She asked, lifting her head off Brian’s chest and looking at her fiancée, who had tears streaming down his own face. “I don’t know baby. We just have to take it one day at a time.”

The next few days were a blur. If Peyton wasn’t crying, she was sleeping. She had to force herself to eat for the baby, and she didn't want to leave her bed, much less the house. Zack had turned to alcohol to numb the pain, and after a very heated argument between them the day before Jimmy’s funeral, Peyton left and went to Brian’s house for a while. The next thing Zack knew, Johnny was beating down his front door. “Zack, open the fucking door or I swear to god I’ll break this motherfucker down.” The bassist said. As soon as the door opened, Johnny was in his face yelling. “What the FUCK is wrong with you? Your fiancée is six months pregnant, she just lost one of her best friends, and she’s scared to death. I know you lost him too, we all did, but you need to pull your fucking head out of your ass before you lose Peyton and the baby for good.” And with that, he turned around and walked back out the door. That night when Peyton got home, Zack pulled her into his arms with tears running down his face, apologizing profusely and begging her not to leave him again. That night, Zack decided that he wouldn’t get drunk out of his mind just to numb the pain of losing Jimmy. Peyton needed him, and he damn sure needed her.

The day of Jimmy’s funeral, everyone met up at Brian’s house and drove over to the cemetery together. Peyton sat beside Jimmy’s sister, Katie, and held her hand tightly as Brian delivered a beautiful eulogy. As they lowered his casket into the ground, Peyton sobbed uncontrollably. Before leaving the cemetery, she whispered one final “see you later, Jimbo,” before going home with her fiancée, trying to figure out how she was going to make it without Jimmy.

Notes

Okay, I struggled really hard with writing this. I know it’s probably not the best, but I had a really hard time actually putting grief into words. Anyway, here it is, the chapter I hated writing the most.