Pro Con list

It was on the inside of her door and she had seen it every morning for the past week when she took her clothes out for the day. Lists were her thing, she used them to decide the school she should go to, where she should go on holiday with her friends and whether she should date him. Now she is using her list to make the most difficult decision yet- whether to keep it, Her baby...His baby. The grainy photo of the baby's first scan sat on top of the pro-con list that was pinned to the inside of her wardrobe in her college dorm. She stood there pondering for a moment before adding another pro to the list- he'd be a great dad, con- you can't trust him, you'd be a single mum. She huffed, shook her head and put her comfy gym kit on before slamming the wardrobe door shut.

As she walked out of the door, her phone vibrated and she noticed it was a text from Jimmy: "Hi Louise, how are you and ducky this fine morning. Today ducky is the size of a strawberry and your boobs and bump will now be bigger! Have you popped over night, call me? J."
Not wanting to think about the baby anymore she chucked her phone on her bag without replying and started walking to the gym for her training session. She'd phone Jimmy later, it was to early for her to listen to him pressuring her to speak to Matt. They had an agreement he'd give her until 12 weeks to get her head around it and if she still hadn't told him then, there would be consequences.

Lou and Matt had been together for 18 months until they split a few weeks ago.
She had walked out on him instantly. Having arrived back from an athletics meet to find Matt desperately trying to fix his trousers before the bedroom door opened and Val struggling to cover up before she was seen in all her glory. There was no need for an explanation; he chased after her, trousers half down and barefoot; shouting at her to stay but she managed to get in the car and get the hell out of there before he could block her exit route.

She couldn't go to her sister's and Johnny's that's the first place he'd look. After driving round in circles, she ended up at the park where she found 'The Rev' feeding the ducks. He took one look at her face and didn't need to ask what was wrong... he knew, they all knew it had been going on for a month. She was dazed and Jimmy scooped her up into his massive arms while he apologised, said she deserved better and then took her back to his. They both ignored Matt's calls and Jimmy's home became a "Shadows free zone" until her return to college a month later.

Louise didn't want to come between friends and encouraged Jimmy to carry on as normal. However, he was proud and let it be known that he and Leana were 'Team Lou' when he wasn't in the studio.

Over the time Louise lived with them she'd begun to throw up and feel nauseous. She was also sleeping more and had complained of having sore boobs to Leana. On overhearing this, Jimmy started to nag about taking a pregnancy test, she resisted for a few weeks saying she was just late and it was just bad PMS. But Jimmy had caught her out, and after two weeks challenged her to take the pregnancy test saying "if you know it's going to be negative then prove it". Having had enough Lou snatched the test out of his hands, walked in to the bathroom and peed on the damn stick. Three minutes later Jimmy was dancing around his house squealing at the top of his voice that he was going to be an uncle.

Louise, on the other hand, was stunned she'd convinced herself that there was nothing to worry about and now here she was pregnant and single. Before she could gather her thoughts Jimmy had found the number of an Obgyn and had booked her an appointment for the following morning.

She had been surprised to learn that she was 8 weeks pregnant and the Doctor, knowing her position as a student athlete, spoke to her about all of her options and the time scales involved. Jimmy had scowled at this and proclaimed that she was keeping the 'bat baby'. Lou on the other hand resolved that she would start on her pro- con list as soon as she got home.

As they spoke in the car on the way back from the doctors office, Jimmy was the first to bring him, the Dad, up. It wasn't a secret that at 27 Matt was looking forward to becoming a Dad. It was something that they had discussed. He wanted commitment, marriage, baby the whole shebang. But, at 21 and still with some time to go before she finished Stanford it was not the right time for Lou. So they'd come to a tacit arrangement that all bets were off when she got to 21. After she was 21 Matt was free to pop the question as long as babies could hold off until after the Olympics which was her primary aim.

Now everything had turned on its head and she needed time to think. That's when her and Jimmy made the deal. She had a month to think things through, make lists and come to her decision before she told Matt. No doubt Jimmy's call that night would be to tell her she's running out of time as she only had two weeks left.

On that note she entered the doors of the gym and glanced at the gyms motto- 'go hard or go home'. Lou nodded and carried onto the changing rooms, maybe the burn of a tough work out session would help her forget the decision she needed to make.

Notes