Seems Like We Lost It All

“At this point I wish I could bring the bastard back to life just to kill him again,” Matt said. I could see his hands shaking out of the corner of my eye. He was pissed.

I let out a choked laugh, bringing the coffee cup clutched between my hands up to my lips. I stared ahead, watching the cars pass in front of us, blinking back tears. I was determined not to shed anymore tears for that man today. We were currently sitting on the hood of Matt’s car in the parking lot of some hole in the wall coffee shop we’d found on the way home from Vegas.

“I’m sorry for making you worry by just disappearing but I completely freaked. I had to get away.”

“No, I understand. I was more worried about Brian taking advantage of you being in a vulnerable state.”

“Brian was amazing, actually. I would have been a disaster if he hadn’t been there with me. Do you really think so badly of him? He’s one of your best friends.”

“Not necessarily. I just don’t know where his head is at after the split from Michelle. Plus I know he’s always had a thing for you.”

“He definitely has not always had a thing for me.”

“Whatever you say.” He finished off the last of his coffee before hopping down off the hood. “I think we should get back now. Val was been worried sick about you, she’ll want to see you as soon as possible.”

We climbed into the car but I stopped Matt before he could start reversing out of the parking space. “Do you think you could get everyone to come over tonight? I just want to get telling them all out of the way as soon as possible. The sooner everyone knows what is going on, the sooner I can start moving on.”

“You don’t have to do this so fast. There is no rush.”

“No, I need to do it now. They are all like family, they deserve to know what’s going on.”

-----------------------

“Okay so what’s the emergency?” Zack asked as he came through the front door. He was the last to arrive, late as usual.

“Emergency?” I questioned, turning my attention to Matt.

He shrugged. “I called an emergency band meeting. It was the only way to get them here without having to answer a thousand questions.”

“There’s no emergency, guys, I just needed to tell you all something. I only wanted to have to do this once so I needed you all here at once.”

My leg bounced from my nervousness and I picked at a loose thread on my jeans. I was worried I wouldn’t be able to get through this without breaking down.

“When I was cleaning out Alex’s desk I found some things that were very difficult to see. I freaked out and that’s why I disappeared. It turns out he was having an-” I trailed off, wiping at my face, unable to keep my composure any longer. I couldn’t do this.

“Do you want me to tell them?” Brian’s voice was soothing in my ear as he dropped an arm around my shoulders.

Matt moved closer on my other side, grabbing my hand and giving me a reassuring squeeze. I felt better already having the two of them by my side.

I shook my head in response to Brian’s question and took a deep breath to steady myself. “Alex was cheating on me. It was a pretty extensive affair from the look of things. There were albums upon albums of pictures of her and of them together. There was months and months worth of text conversations and phone calls and that’s just as far back as I could stand to look. Who knows how long it had actually been going on.”

The room was silent for a few moments then it seemed like everyone erupted all at once. There was chaos. They were talking over each other, clearly all just as upset as Brian and Matt had been. I was crying again but not sad tears, at least not completely. Having this group of weirdos on my side was a heartwarming thing even in the midst of my sadness.

“Guys, calm the fuck down! You’re upsetting her even more!” Matt growled, going into protective brother mode.

“No, it’s fine, honestly. The hard part is over now.” I wiped the tears from my face a final time and forced a smile. “I get to focus on moving forward with my life now.”

Notes

Not my favorite chapter, but hey it's an update!