Who Are You?
Mad Hatter
.:.:.
Shopping day was here and Elise was already dreading having agreed to it. She wanted nothing more than to lie in bed all day or watch garbage movies while pigging out on junk food. As wonderful as those options sounded, Leana’s tiny fury from Elise not going scared her. So, she ripped her phone from the charger and decided to start the long day ahead of her with a shower.
Elise had another hour to kill before she would be meeting the other girls at the mall and decided to send a quick message to her sister’s email before finding food. The day was expected to be in the high 90’s so Elise opted for a smoothie instead of a heavy breakfast. She finished getting ready in the most comfortable clothes she had, slipped on her shoes, and made her way to the parking lot.
It was nearly noon when Elise had finished the last of her drink. She was currently sitting in her truck under what little shade she could find. The girls were supposed to meet up around 12:00 but Elise knew there would be that one straggler that would show up a little later. Elise sent a text to Lee letting her know she was already there to which Leana replied with a thumbs up. She then decided to type up a message for Matt, unsure if he was still sleeping or helping at his father’s shop. Either way, the text would be waiting for him. She didn’t feel like sending the typical “hello” and decided on an absurd joke.
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Elise snorted at the opening of her own joke and hit send. She looked forward to any guesses Matt had to offer. Just then her phone vibrated.
Lee: Here! Parked by the food court!
Ok, see you inside!
Elise slipped the phone into her purse and made way inside the mall. Thankfully it wasn’t very busy compared to the first trip she took with the ladies. Either people were at work or school or they didn’t want to brave the heat. Whatever the reason, she was glad.
“Hey!”
Elise turned and smiled at the bubbly woman bouncing up and down. She didn’t see anyone else with Leana but expected them to arrive any minute. The two women decided to get started and headed into a nearby clothing shop. They instantly began laughing at each other’s honesty when presented with a piece of clothing.
.:.:.
“I don’t think I could ever see you in pink.” Lee giggled at the pink sweater Elise currently had in her hand.
“Reminds me of the sweater Kelso gifted Jackie on ‘That 70’s Show’.” Elise laughed as she put the garment back on the rack. “When are the other two supposed to be here?”
Leana fished round in her purse for her phone and glanced at the screen causing her to frown. “Looks like they won’t be joining us today. Lacey texted me ten minutes ago saying Gena is having a breakdown about Zack. Hm, oh well! Looks like it’s just you and me!”
In a selfish way, Elise was relieved to be spending some alone time with her roommate. The hours passed in a flash as the two women enjoyed each other’s company. They only had a couple of bags each from different stores when they decided to call it a day.
“I should really go in for a touch up.” Leana was practically talking to herself when the two stopped just outside of a salon.
“A touch up?” Elise questioned.
“For my downstairs. It’s been a couple weeks and Jimmy is supposed to be taking me out for a nice dinner this weekend.” Lee laughed as her friend’s expression turned to one of understanding.
Elise turned towards Leana and asked, “Does it hurt? I’ve actually never been waxed before.”
“It’s so worth the pain. It turns into more of a discomfort the more times you get it done but I highly recommend. It’ll only take fifteen minutes. Let’s go!” Lee was already halfway into the salon before she finished her sentence.
The salon was nice but very basic the more Elise looked around. There were a few women scattered around the room attending to their clients in what appeared to be some type of facial and eyebrow services. This was all new to the redhead and her curiosity began growing. She was growing as a person and today seemed like the perfect time to try something new.
“I’ll do it.” Elise smiled as Leana’s face lit up.
“Make that two Playboy services!” Lee told the receptionist
.:.:.
“I don’t mind pain but I wasn’t expecting that. Elise groaned as she carefully walked out of the mall.
Leana giggled, “Yeah, my first time was a mess. I would tense up and twitch every time she would go to pull the wax strip. It honestly does get better the more you do it, Ellie.”
She groaned, “My hair grows pretty quickly so I’ll unfortunately be back here soon. So, what do you want to do now?”
Elise and Leana were standing outside in the evening sun when the decided to head back home. They parted ways and Elise slowly made her way to the parking lot where her truck was waiting for her. The shopping bags were quickly tossed onto the seat when her phone began to ring. She glanced at the screen as a big smile graced her face.
“Hello?”
"Hey, cutie. Whatcha up to?”
“Nothing really, just got done shopping with Lee. No work today?”
“How fun. I left early, it was kind of slow at the shop. Any plans for dinner tonight?”
“Not yet. I was about to head home and drop off all my stuff. What did you have in mind?”
“Honestly, I just wanted to chill and have some pizza.”
“Can’t go wrong with pizza. Wanna come by my place and watch a movie or something?”
“Sure, I think Jimmy was going to be stopping later to hang out with Lee, if you don’t mind
them joining.”
“Of course not! The more the merrier. I’ll be there in about twenty minutes if you want to head on over.”
“Sounds good. So, uhh, what is this about masturbating cows?”
“Yeah, what do you call a herd of cows masturbating?”
“I honestly have no idea. What?” Matt chuckled.
“Beef strokinoff!” Elise’s outburst was followed by a giggle.
“Are you serious?”, he laughed, “Wow. You’re dirty. I like it. I’ll see you in a bit, gorgeous.”
“Can’t wait, handsome.”
Elise ended the call and couldn’t hide the grin on her face. She quickly texted Leana about what was going on, already knowing she would be just as excited.
.:.:.
Elise was straightening up their living room when a knock on the door rattled throughout the apartment. She fluffed the last pillow on the couch before throwing it down and walking to the door. A quick peek through the peephole revealed the lenses of Matt’s dark aviators. Elise chuckled and opened the door.
“Congratulations, ma’am! Your Krabby Patty pizza is here!” Matt beamed while holding out a stack of cardboard boxes.
“Wow, thanks! I’ve been dying for one of these. It…Where’s my drink?” Elise channeled her inner SpongeBob while motioning for him to come inside.
“Come on, Elise. You know I’m a tall drink of water for you.” Matt took off his glasses and wiggled his eyebrows, earning him a snort from the redhead.
“You are something else. There’s just one problem…” Elise closed the door and turned to look at Matt.
His hazel eyes showed confusion as he set the food on the coffee table, “Problem?”
She stepped closer towards Matt and placed a single pointer finger against his chest. Elise looked him in the eye, “I don’t have any money to pay you for these pizzas, Mr. delivery man. What ever shall I do?”
“I could think of a few things.” His voice was low as he grabbed Elise by the hips and pulled her towards him even more.
“I can’t unsee or unhear what I just saw and heard.” Leana walked out from the kitchen with eyes closed tight and hands covering her ears. The two laughed and broke away from each other.
Jimmy arrived a few minutes after Matt while the girls finished setting out the snacks. There was enough food for a three day stomach ache but Jimmy insisted there needed to be more. After finally convincing the lively drummer there was plenty to eat and drink, Leana curled up beside her boyfriend with a slice of pizza in hand. Elise, on the other hand, sat pressed to other end of the couch while being eyed by the muscular man sitting a few feet away in the recliner.
“What do you fuckers want to watch?” Jimmy asked just as he cracked open a can of beer.
Lee shrugged a shoulder, Matt mumbled something only God could understand while Elise only shook her head.
“I’ll put a porno on if somebody doesn’t pick something!” Jimmy blurted out only to be pinched by his girlfriend.
“How about something scary? If Christmas in July is a thing, why not have Halloween in June?” Elise piped in. Everyone agreed without hesitation and soon the group was watching a marathon of low budget horror films.
As the third movie played on, Elise’s eyes were glued to the screen the whole time. While her attention was strictly undivided, she still knew there were a set of eyes that weren’t interested in the same thing she was watching. Matt had been sneaking glances at the redhead and was anything but subtle about it. A mental smile hung around inside her head whenever she thought of Matt. It was sudden to have this level of comfort around the guy but the unexpected is what made it that much more exciting. Elise glanced towards the couple sitting beside her and tried her hardest to stifle a chuckle. She motioned to Matt to also take a look at them as a big grin grew on his face.
They had both fallen asleep but not in the most flattering way. Leana lie opened mouth with a piece of popcorn gentle swaying from her bottom lip with each shallow breath she took. Jimmy was slightly snoring, head thrown back against the headrest, while his opened box of sour gummies showered Lee’s hair with sugar. The two adults were silently laughing until Matt stood from his seat. Elise’s smile faded a bit when she noticed Matt gather his wallet and phone from the coffee table and place them into his pockets. He gestured for Elise to follow as he walked towards the front door.
“Those two really are perfect for each other.” Matt chuckled as soon as they were both outside.
Elise smiled, “Yeah. It’s amazing how natural they are together. It’s moving. Anyways, I’m sure you need to get going, I won’t keep you.”
“I would much rather spend my time here with you but I do have to get up pretty early. We’ll have to get together again. When do you work next?” Matt asked.
She couldn’t help but blush, “I’m off tomorrow night but then I’ll be closing Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Hopefully my uncle will be merciful and give me Monday off.”
“Alright, cool. Looks like date number three will potentially be on Monday. Details to come.” Matt smirked before wrapping the woman in a hug.
“Only the details?” Elise pulled back to stick her tongue out and wink.
Matt pulled her against him again and lightly touched his lips to her pierced ear, “Are you hoping something else will come.”
She could feel his lips stretch into a smirk. He had to notice the temperature of her ear turn burning hot. This man was a quick-witted smartass but she wasn’t going to be beat. Elise grabbed his jaw and brought her face close to his. She savored the way his eyes traveled across her features, it was even better knowing she would have the last word.
As she looked from his lips to his hazel eyes, she brought her face mere centimeters from his before whispering, “You gotta give to get, I’m not so sure you’re up for the challenge.” With that, she smirked and broke away from his embrace. Another wink was shot his way before Elise turned to walk back inside the apartment.
Got him.
Before she could reach the handle, a warm, rough hand gently grabbed her throat. Matt pressed himself against her back, his fingers squeezing slightly.
“It won’t be a challenge, trust me.” He growled lowly before kissing behind her ear. Elise was left in a daze as Matt smacked her on the ass and walked away.
That man could make you mad as a hatter.
Shopping day was here and Elise was already dreading having agreed to it. She wanted nothing more than to lie in bed all day or watch garbage movies while pigging out on junk food. As wonderful as those options sounded, Leana’s tiny fury from Elise not going scared her. So, she ripped her phone from the charger and decided to start the long day ahead of her with a shower.
Elise had another hour to kill before she would be meeting the other girls at the mall and decided to send a quick message to her sister’s email before finding food. The day was expected to be in the high 90’s so Elise opted for a smoothie instead of a heavy breakfast. She finished getting ready in the most comfortable clothes she had, slipped on her shoes, and made her way to the parking lot.
It was nearly noon when Elise had finished the last of her drink. She was currently sitting in her truck under what little shade she could find. The girls were supposed to meet up around 12:00 but Elise knew there would be that one straggler that would show up a little later. Elise sent a text to Lee letting her know she was already there to which Leana replied with a thumbs up. She then decided to type up a message for Matt, unsure if he was still sleeping or helping at his father’s shop. Either way, the text would be waiting for him. She didn’t feel like sending the typical “hello” and decided on an absurd joke.
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Elise snorted at the opening of her own joke and hit send. She looked forward to any guesses Matt had to offer. Just then her phone vibrated.
Lee: Here! Parked by the food court!
Ok, see you inside!
Elise slipped the phone into her purse and made way inside the mall. Thankfully it wasn’t very busy compared to the first trip she took with the ladies. Either people were at work or school or they didn’t want to brave the heat. Whatever the reason, she was glad.
“Hey!”
Elise turned and smiled at the bubbly woman bouncing up and down. She didn’t see anyone else with Leana but expected them to arrive any minute. The two women decided to get started and headed into a nearby clothing shop. They instantly began laughing at each other’s honesty when presented with a piece of clothing.
.:.:.
“I don’t think I could ever see you in pink.” Lee giggled at the pink sweater Elise currently had in her hand.
“Reminds me of the sweater Kelso gifted Jackie on ‘That 70’s Show’.” Elise laughed as she put the garment back on the rack. “When are the other two supposed to be here?”
Leana fished round in her purse for her phone and glanced at the screen causing her to frown. “Looks like they won’t be joining us today. Lacey texted me ten minutes ago saying Gena is having a breakdown about Zack. Hm, oh well! Looks like it’s just you and me!”
In a selfish way, Elise was relieved to be spending some alone time with her roommate. The hours passed in a flash as the two women enjoyed each other’s company. They only had a couple of bags each from different stores when they decided to call it a day.
“I should really go in for a touch up.” Leana was practically talking to herself when the two stopped just outside of a salon.
“A touch up?” Elise questioned.
“For my downstairs. It’s been a couple weeks and Jimmy is supposed to be taking me out for a nice dinner this weekend.” Lee laughed as her friend’s expression turned to one of understanding.
Elise turned towards Leana and asked, “Does it hurt? I’ve actually never been waxed before.”
“It’s so worth the pain. It turns into more of a discomfort the more times you get it done but I highly recommend. It’ll only take fifteen minutes. Let’s go!” Lee was already halfway into the salon before she finished her sentence.
The salon was nice but very basic the more Elise looked around. There were a few women scattered around the room attending to their clients in what appeared to be some type of facial and eyebrow services. This was all new to the redhead and her curiosity began growing. She was growing as a person and today seemed like the perfect time to try something new.
“I’ll do it.” Elise smiled as Leana’s face lit up.
“Make that two Playboy services!” Lee told the receptionist
.:.:.
“I don’t mind pain but I wasn’t expecting that. Elise groaned as she carefully walked out of the mall.
Leana giggled, “Yeah, my first time was a mess. I would tense up and twitch every time she would go to pull the wax strip. It honestly does get better the more you do it, Ellie.”
She groaned, “My hair grows pretty quickly so I’ll unfortunately be back here soon. So, what do you want to do now?”
Elise and Leana were standing outside in the evening sun when the decided to head back home. They parted ways and Elise slowly made her way to the parking lot where her truck was waiting for her. The shopping bags were quickly tossed onto the seat when her phone began to ring. She glanced at the screen as a big smile graced her face.
“Hello?”
"Hey, cutie. Whatcha up to?”
“Nothing really, just got done shopping with Lee. No work today?”
“How fun. I left early, it was kind of slow at the shop. Any plans for dinner tonight?”
“Not yet. I was about to head home and drop off all my stuff. What did you have in mind?”
“Honestly, I just wanted to chill and have some pizza.”
“Can’t go wrong with pizza. Wanna come by my place and watch a movie or something?”
“Sure, I think Jimmy was going to be stopping later to hang out with Lee, if you don’t mind
them joining.”
“Of course not! The more the merrier. I’ll be there in about twenty minutes if you want to head on over.”
“Sounds good. So, uhh, what is this about masturbating cows?”
“Yeah, what do you call a herd of cows masturbating?”
“I honestly have no idea. What?” Matt chuckled.
“Beef strokinoff!” Elise’s outburst was followed by a giggle.
“Are you serious?”, he laughed, “Wow. You’re dirty. I like it. I’ll see you in a bit, gorgeous.”
“Can’t wait, handsome.”
Elise ended the call and couldn’t hide the grin on her face. She quickly texted Leana about what was going on, already knowing she would be just as excited.
.:.:.
Elise was straightening up their living room when a knock on the door rattled throughout the apartment. She fluffed the last pillow on the couch before throwing it down and walking to the door. A quick peek through the peephole revealed the lenses of Matt’s dark aviators. Elise chuckled and opened the door.
“Congratulations, ma’am! Your Krabby Patty pizza is here!” Matt beamed while holding out a stack of cardboard boxes.
“Wow, thanks! I’ve been dying for one of these. It…Where’s my drink?” Elise channeled her inner SpongeBob while motioning for him to come inside.
“Come on, Elise. You know I’m a tall drink of water for you.” Matt took off his glasses and wiggled his eyebrows, earning him a snort from the redhead.
“You are something else. There’s just one problem…” Elise closed the door and turned to look at Matt.
His hazel eyes showed confusion as he set the food on the coffee table, “Problem?”
She stepped closer towards Matt and placed a single pointer finger against his chest. Elise looked him in the eye, “I don’t have any money to pay you for these pizzas, Mr. delivery man. What ever shall I do?”
“I could think of a few things.” His voice was low as he grabbed Elise by the hips and pulled her towards him even more.
“I can’t unsee or unhear what I just saw and heard.” Leana walked out from the kitchen with eyes closed tight and hands covering her ears. The two laughed and broke away from each other.
Jimmy arrived a few minutes after Matt while the girls finished setting out the snacks. There was enough food for a three day stomach ache but Jimmy insisted there needed to be more. After finally convincing the lively drummer there was plenty to eat and drink, Leana curled up beside her boyfriend with a slice of pizza in hand. Elise, on the other hand, sat pressed to other end of the couch while being eyed by the muscular man sitting a few feet away in the recliner.
“What do you fuckers want to watch?” Jimmy asked just as he cracked open a can of beer.
Lee shrugged a shoulder, Matt mumbled something only God could understand while Elise only shook her head.
“I’ll put a porno on if somebody doesn’t pick something!” Jimmy blurted out only to be pinched by his girlfriend.
“How about something scary? If Christmas in July is a thing, why not have Halloween in June?” Elise piped in. Everyone agreed without hesitation and soon the group was watching a marathon of low budget horror films.
As the third movie played on, Elise’s eyes were glued to the screen the whole time. While her attention was strictly undivided, she still knew there were a set of eyes that weren’t interested in the same thing she was watching. Matt had been sneaking glances at the redhead and was anything but subtle about it. A mental smile hung around inside her head whenever she thought of Matt. It was sudden to have this level of comfort around the guy but the unexpected is what made it that much more exciting. Elise glanced towards the couple sitting beside her and tried her hardest to stifle a chuckle. She motioned to Matt to also take a look at them as a big grin grew on his face.
They had both fallen asleep but not in the most flattering way. Leana lie opened mouth with a piece of popcorn gentle swaying from her bottom lip with each shallow breath she took. Jimmy was slightly snoring, head thrown back against the headrest, while his opened box of sour gummies showered Lee’s hair with sugar. The two adults were silently laughing until Matt stood from his seat. Elise’s smile faded a bit when she noticed Matt gather his wallet and phone from the coffee table and place them into his pockets. He gestured for Elise to follow as he walked towards the front door.
“Those two really are perfect for each other.” Matt chuckled as soon as they were both outside.
Elise smiled, “Yeah. It’s amazing how natural they are together. It’s moving. Anyways, I’m sure you need to get going, I won’t keep you.”
“I would much rather spend my time here with you but I do have to get up pretty early. We’ll have to get together again. When do you work next?” Matt asked.
She couldn’t help but blush, “I’m off tomorrow night but then I’ll be closing Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Hopefully my uncle will be merciful and give me Monday off.”
“Alright, cool. Looks like date number three will potentially be on Monday. Details to come.” Matt smirked before wrapping the woman in a hug.
“Only the details?” Elise pulled back to stick her tongue out and wink.
Matt pulled her against him again and lightly touched his lips to her pierced ear, “Are you hoping something else will come.”
She could feel his lips stretch into a smirk. He had to notice the temperature of her ear turn burning hot. This man was a quick-witted smartass but she wasn’t going to be beat. Elise grabbed his jaw and brought her face close to his. She savored the way his eyes traveled across her features, it was even better knowing she would have the last word.
As she looked from his lips to his hazel eyes, she brought her face mere centimeters from his before whispering, “You gotta give to get, I’m not so sure you’re up for the challenge.” With that, she smirked and broke away from his embrace. Another wink was shot his way before Elise turned to walk back inside the apartment.
Got him.
Before she could reach the handle, a warm, rough hand gently grabbed her throat. Matt pressed himself against her back, his fingers squeezing slightly.
“It won’t be a challenge, trust me.” He growled lowly before kissing behind her ear. Elise was left in a daze as Matt smacked her on the ass and walked away.
That man could make you mad as a hatter.
Notes
Thank you so much to HereticBlood6661 and Buggaloo for your comments! As always, thank you for reading!
Well damn! ;) glad you’re back!
6/2/19