When the World Crashes Down, Will You Still Be There?

Rain splattered against the bay windows of a moderate sized house in Southern California, spreading a gloomy vibe throughout the halls. It was a miserable Saturday outside in Huntington Beach but there were still those trying to make the best of it. Laughter and loud chatter consumed the house as people entered through the front door. A group of lifelong friends barged into the house carrying an onslaught off booze and food. Their originally planned cookout may have been washed out from the rain but that didn’t mean they couldn’t make the best of it and work with what they had.

All the noise fell on deaf ears to the woman alone upstairs. La’Nay sat crossed legged on the hardwood floor of her art studio with her headphones blaring ambient beats through the small speakers. An easel with a half finished canvas almost the size of her in length was placed in front of her, and as she stared blankly at the mash of ocean blues and swirls of violet, she felt lost. In frustration she let out a huff of air before resting her chin in her free hand, while her right twirled the paintbrush in her hand. She didn’t even notice the movement smeared acrylic paint across her cheek and the arms of her golden-bronze tattooed skin. For months she’d been stuck on this one painting, day by day slowly losing inspiration and motivation to finish the piece that she so passionately been working on. At this point she had half the mind to say ‘fuck it’ and just chuck it in the trash.

She practically jumped out of her skin when she felt a hand grip her shoulder. She quickly turned and glanced up to see the displeased face of her husband Jason. She could see his mouth moving but the spacey beats blocked out what he was saying.

“Nay? Dammit are you even paying attention to what I’m saying?” She heard as she took her earbuds out.

“I’m sorry Jason, what did you say?” She asked and bit her lip in nervousness as she watched her husband let out an aggravated sigh and take his SnapBack off his head and run his fingers through his chocolate brown locks in frustration.

“You didn’t hear a damn thing I just said did you?” He rolled his eyes and his wife shrank back a bit suddenly feeling small under his intense gaze. “I’ve been calling you from downstairs for practically five minutes, everyone is almost here.”

“Shit, Baby, I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you over my headphones and I was so engrossed in this painting.” La’Nay explained as she started to get up off the floor of her makeshift studio. She started to walk around her art studio, putting away the painting and other supplies. “I’ve been trying to finish this for months now and I’ve gotten nowhere and it's starting to piss me off a bit.”
Jason just rolled his eyes again and snorted completely disinterested in his wife’s turmoil

“Babe, you can work on your little art projects later.”

La’Nay deflated even more from the harshness of his voice and the phrasing of his words. There was a time when he used to praise her for passion and artistic abilities but nowadays it felt as if he was reducing it to a simple insignificant hobby, like paint time for preschoolers. She was a highly respected freelance artist in her field but for a while she hadn’t been feeling like it.

“Alright.” Was her only response as she finished putting away her supplies and started to walk out the door But Jason’s hand on her wrist stopped her.

“You’re going downstairs looking like that?” La’Nay frowned at his words, glancing down at her attire. She was in a simple loose black crop top that fell low on her shoulder and baggy light grey sweatpants, with a messy bun on top of her head. The material was covered in an array of various paint colors, since it was her ‘work’ clothes; the paint splatters unintentionally complimented her tattooed skin well. Either way she didn’t see what the problem was, their friends had become used to her always in paint covered attire and could careless.

“What’s wrong with it? It's just the gang, none of them care what I’m wearing.”

“You look a mess. At least wear something that isn’t covered in paint.” he practically ordered as he let go of her. La’Nay had a retort on the tip of her tongue but refraining from starting an argument, she swallowed down the hurt burning in her chest and made her way to their bedroom to change into a new pair of clothes.

As La’Nay made her way into their bedroom, she thought that Jason was going to follow and tell her what to wear. Much to her relief he continued to make his way towards the stairs and back down to their friends. She sighed sadly to herself as she rummaged through their walk-in closet to find a decent outfit. After a few minutes of searching La’Nay settled on a simple pair of light blue high-waisted boyfriend jeans and a white over the shoulder crop top. She sprayed a bit of perfume on before she sat in front of her vanity. The young woman brushed a long strand of her jet black hair out of her face and behind her ear. La’Nay was debating on whether or not she wanted to put on makeup to appease her husband. Just as she reached for her liquid eyeliner there was a knock on the door.

“Come in!” She called knowing it was one of her friends so it didn’t really matter who was coming in. The door creaked open slowly revealing her friends Jamie with her fiery ginger hair and Hailey, platinum blonde fading at the roots.

“Hey Nay, you coming down soon? You know it's not a true get together without you there.” Jamie stated as she moved to sit down on La’Nay’s right side. Hailey placed herself on the left and the two of them squeezed their friend in a tight hug. The two didn’t know what was wrong but they knew that whatever was bothering their friend had something to do with her husband. Everyone in their little circle could feel the tension between the couple and it was starting to slowly get worse.

“You alright?” Hailey questioned resting her head on her friend’s shoulder and gazing at her through the mirror.

“I’m fine, just wondering if I should put on makeup or not.” Nay huffed.

“Were you just in your studio? Why’d you bother changing? It’s not like we haven’t seen you messy and covered in paint before. It's actually kind of cute.” Hailey teased but was being completely honest. La’Nay signed deeply and ran her fingers through her hair.

“Jason suggested that I change since we have company over.” She omitted the fact that he basically demanded she change but her friends didn’t need to know that.

“Who the hell cares, it's just us.” Jamie stated, mildly annoyed by her friend’s husband. Jamie had never liked Jason and everyone but Nay knew it.

“I didn’t feel like arguing about it so I just said I would.” La’Nay explained “It’s really not that big of a deal.” She shrugged reaching for her eyeliner again. Jamie and Hailey shared a look while their friend was occupied. They didn’t know what was happening in their friend’s marriage but whatever it was had been chipping away at her self esteem and it was breaking their hearts.

“Anyways, who else is here?” La’Nay inquired.

“Everybody else is downstairs, Brian and Blenda came in like less than five minutes after Jimmy and I did and they were arguing like usual. Zack and Abrianna are snuggled up and being obnoxiously affectionate on the sofa like always.” Jamie told her.

“Shit, how long have you all been here?”

“About thirty minutes.” Hailey shrugged “The only person that’s not here yet is Matt.”

“Fuck, I’m sorry y’all. I was too focused on this one painting I’ve been working on and I made no progress whatsoever.” Nay apologized while doing a final swoop on her eyeliner.

“Don’t worry about it, it’s not like we thought you were ignoring us on purpose. We all know how you get when you’re in the zone.” Jamie said waving off her friends apology.

“Wait? You said Mattie’s not here yet? He’s usually the first one to everything.” La’Nay reached for her phone and checked to see if she had any notifications. “And he hasn’t called or sent me a text, has Mattie contacted any of you guys?”

Jamie and Hailey gave her an amused yet knowing look. Their friend was so oblivious, but in a situation like this that was a good thing. Out of everyone Matt and La’Nay were the closest, and sometimes it seemed like boundaries didn’t apply to them. Their friends just brushed it off as them being Matt and Lala (since he was the only one allowed to call her that), it was rare there was one without the other. That was okay back in middle school and high school, everyone thought they'd eventually end up together, but that was years ago and she was a married woman, while his relationships never seemed to last over a year. To this day The pair were a little too close and maybe if circumstances were different it be perfect.

“Nay, I’m sure Matt is fine, he’s a big boy he can take care of himself.” Hailey stated.
“I know that, but he’s my best friend I can’t help but to worry about him. Doesn't matter that he could kill a man with his bare hands if he wanted to” Their friend reasoned. Jamie and Hailey laughed at her analogy because it was true. “Maybe I should call him.” She went to scroll to his contact but her friends stopped her.

“Let’s just get you downstairs so you can join the rest of civilization.” Jamie joked, taking away her friend’s phone as she stood up. La’Nay pouted but did what she was told and followed her friends out of her bedroom. She was still a bit worried about Matt since he wasn’t there yet and the weather was so shitty outside but she knew they were right. Her best friend could handle himself better than anyone else she knew.


*****
“Look who finally decided to join the living” Johnny teased as soon as La’Nay stepped into the living room. He opened his arms wide and she rolled her eyes and went into his embrace and kissed his cheek.

“Haven’t seen you in almost two weeks, that's a record for us, how you been?” She mumbled into her friend’s shoulder.

“Eh, same old, same old, nothing new or exciting going on, just taking care of the twins. Nice to have a night off for once.” Johnny explained a fond smile creeping onto his face at the thought of his twin boys. “They miss you by the way, they keep asking when Auntie Nay is coming to visit.”

“And I miss them too, the next time you need a babysitter call me first.” La’Nay spoke sincerely, if there was one thing she adored the most in the world it was her nieces and nephews.
“Of course we will” Hailey chimed in sitting down next to her husband.

“You just gonna act like I don’t exist?” A voice called from across the room and she grinned as she turned around.

“Of course not Jimbo” Nay rushed over to him and he stood up to hug her. Being the shortest girl in their group of friends, she was just under Jimmy’s shoulders and as he held her in a tight bear hug, Nay felt at peace with her friends, her family.

“Hey, don't I get a hug?” Brian asked as she went to sit down next to Jason. The older man pouted and his wife Blenda giggled at his silliness.

“Of course Bri” La’Nay cooed as she bent down to hug him but moved to hug Blenda at the last second instead. Their friends started laughing at the burn and Brian started to whine when his wife pulled their friend onto her lap.

“Hey that's not fair.” He complained as he made grabby hands for her.

“Tough shit, Babe.” Blenda teased, sticking her tongue out at her husband as she squeezed her friend tighter. The younger girl giggled as Blenda started to tickle her.

"Nay, come here” he whined, pulling her out of his wife’s lap and into his.

“It’s like y’all are passing me around like a blunt” She joked, causing them all to laugh. Brian wrapped his arms around her stomach and squeezed her tight. Blenda shifted her friend’s legs so they were resting in her lap. She traced the outline of Nay’s tattoos that were peeking out through the rips in her jeans with her crimson nails causing her the younger woman to giggle.

“Speaking of, nobody brought any, curse us for being adults with responsibilities!” Jimmy joked and his wife playfully shoved him before leaning into his side and smiled to herself.

“You’re such a dork” Jamie cooed, lacing their fingers together.

“You love it though.” Jimmy countered and Jamie didn’t bother to deny it just curled up closer to him.

“You’re not going to come over to us?” Zack asked in mock offense, Abrianna snickered as her head rested on her husband’s shoulder. Zack subconsciously squeezed her tighter and La’Nay mentally cooed at how cute her friends were.

“I saw y’all yesterday” Nay reasoned from Brian’s lap. “Besides, I wouldn’t want to interrupt the cuteness overload that you two have going on right now. I don’t want to be a third wheel in my own house.”

The couple gave her the finger but laughed along with their friends, they both knew they could be a bit much at times.

“Can I have my wife back now?” Jason joked but his wife could detect the annoyance and possessiveness in his tone. Somewhat reluctantly La’Nay removed herself from Brian’s lap and made her way over to her husband. She moved to rest against her husband’s side and he made no move to put his arms around her. Instead Jason moved in and gave her what could barely be considered a peck before taking a sip of his beer and focusing back on the movie they were watching. La’Nay was bit pissed off at his actions, she didn’t see the point in making her move from her place with their friends if he was just going to ignore her.

Sighing to herself she watched as the rest of her friends became engrossed with their significant others. Despite the issues she knew of in her friends married life, they still seemed so in love as the day they said ‘I do’. La’Nay wanted to know what that felt like, to constantly feel loved given any situation. For her it felt so foreign.


*****

The doorbell ringing about an hour later caught everyone's attention but it was La’Nay that shot up from her spot and rushed towards the front door. She knew it had to be Matt and she’d been anxious for him to arrive. She had seen him three days before when Matt had helped her go shopping for new art supplies, but that didn’t help the fact that she missed her best friend. Nobody got her like Matt did, not even Jason understood her as well as her best friend; which said a lot.

La’Nay practically flung the door open when she reached it. Her heart sunk a bit at the form of her best friend soaked to the core and shivering. Matt’s hair that he let grow out to his shoulders clung to his face, water dripping down onto his already soaked black sleeveless Iron Maiden t-shirt. He looked like a drowned rat but despite all that the moment he came face to face with his best friend he smiled brightly.

“Jesus, Mattie are you alright?” La’Nay asked as she ushered him into the house.

“Yeah, Lala, I'm fine. I just ran to the store to grab some beer and shit before I got here and it started down pouring before I could get back to my car.” Matt explained as she squeezed her tiny frame against his wet form in a hug before pulling away.

“You weren't answering your phone and it's raining cats and dogs out there, I was starting to get worried.”

“Sorry Lala, my phone's on silent. That chick Kathryn, Blenda set me up with last month won't stop calling, it's driving me nuts. I blocked her number and she still manages to keep calling. I might have to change my number.”

“Maybe you should just take a break from dating?” She suggested trying not to giggle at Matt’s misfortune.

“You’re probably right.” He simply shrugged as he followed behind her into the living room where their friends were. Matt’s eyes shifted down and landed on his best friend’s ass as they walked. He bit his lip as he followed the natural sway of her hips. There was no denying that La’Nay was stunning. He’d always thought so, even back in middle school when they first met, back when she was a chubby little ten year old that seemed to be afraid of her own shadow. She’d always been adorable to him and La’Nay was someone he held precious to his heart. She was his Lala.

Matt shook himself out of his thoughts, he was treading into dangerous territory. No matter how many relationships he’d had throughout the years, there was something about his best friend he could never shake. Matt had accepted the fact that he’d missed his chance over ten years ago. Too afraid to ruin their friendship to make a move and then Jason did what he was too afraid to do, his friend had asked La’Nay out and the rest was history. Thinking of what could have been used to keep him up at night but in time he’d learned to accept it, but there were times he couldn’t stop his brain from lusting after her. He’d missed his shot and now La’Nay was unattainable and Matt had learned to deal with it.

“I’m gonna need your input on that damned painting, I’m at a complete loss at what to do with it.” La’Nay complained to him as the continued walking down the hallway. “I’m thinking of just tossing it out.”

“Well don’t throw it away. Maybe put it on the back burner for a few. We’re all going on that vacation soon right? Use that time as a breather to get inspiration. Then you’ll come back to your studio and turn it into a masterpiece like you always do.”

La’Nay couldn’t help but to become flustered at her best friend’s words, when it came to her work, Matt always praised her no matter what type of art it was. “Shut up, Mattie” she blushed.

“What the hell happened Matt, did you get caught in a monsoon outside or something?” Johnny joked when the two of them finally entered the living room. The rest of their friends chuckled in amusement at the sight of their drenched friend.

“Shit, I might as well have, you’ve seen what it’s like outside.” Matt spoke as he made a move to sit on the sofa next to Abrianna but La’Nay swatted his arm before he could.

“Don’t sit on my furniture with your soaked ass” She chastised “Put the beer down and come with me, I think you left some clothes here from when you stayed with us while your house was getting renovated.”

“That was almost a year ago” Matt deadpanned.

“Hey, it’s not my fault you never took all your shit back. Now come on, let’s get you into some dry clothes.” La’Nay ushered Matt out the room. Jason was too busy texting to pay much attention or care for his friend’s arrival. From across the room Jamie and Hailey shared another look, noticing Jason’s behavior. He'd made such a big deal about his wife looking good for company and he was ignoring them all.

“Well, I'm starving so I'm gonna get some food” Jamie stated getting up.

“I'll come with you” Hailey chimed in knowing fully well that the other two girls would pick up on the ‘we need to talk’ tone. The guys were too into the movie and La’Nay was upstairs with Matt. This left the four of them with the chance to finally voice their concerns about Jason and La’Nay’s relationship.

Picking up on their cues Abrianna slowly removed herself from her husband. Zack tried to squeeze her close when she first tried to move away, he whined a bit and his wife rolled her eyes fondly. “Babe, going in the kitchen to talk about Nay.” She whispered in his ear and he nodded in understanding, knowing she’d fill him in later. He pecked her lips before letting her go. As he watched Abrianna go Zack smiled to himself bittersweetly. Whatever was going on in his friends’ marriage was a growing concern amongst their friends but nobody seemed to know how to address the issue. As much as he hated his friends’ circumstances it was nice to focus on somebody else's problems instead of his own. He shook himself out of the negative thoughts creeping into his mind desperately tried to focus on the television instead. Now was not the time to let his past demons haunt him.


*****

When Blenda had managed to finally make it into the kitchen after prying herself out of her husband’s hold for almost five minutes, her friends were already underway in discussing La’Nay and Jason’s relationship, along with the topic of Matt.

“Alright lovelies” she started leaning up against the island “fill me in.” Blenda practically ordered popping a chip in her mouth. The three of them grinned at her antics and started to catch her up on the conversation.

“We’re basically trying to figure out what the hell is going on with Jason and Nay.” Abrianna told her “Whatever’s been going on has been taking hits to Nay’s self esteem, we all know how down on herself she can get, so we gotta figure how to make this right.” she was already making mental notes on what they could do. “You both said earlier Jason basically told her that she looked a mess and made her change, right?”

“He did what now?” Blenda quipped, cracking her knuckles, if there was one thing Blenda was it was protective over her girls.

“Nay said Jason pretty much made her change out of her work clothes cause they have company over and she’d look a mess covered in paint” Jamie filled her in and Blenda snorted.

“Who the fuck cares? It's just us, besides he’s never had much of a problem with it before.”

“That's what we were both thinking” Hailey jumped in “Why does he care all the sudden?”

“When do we go on vacation again?” Abrianna asked.

“We’re going to Tahiti in about two weeks” Jamie answered “Why?”

“I think that we should see how the vacation turns out before we confront them about it. Maybe a vacation is what they need to get them back on track” Abrianna voiced her thinking.

“You sure about that Abri?” Blenda questioned, the two of them tended to but heads when it came to situations like this but they always managed to come up with a compromise. “What if things manage to get worse during the trip?”

“Then it will be the perfect place for an intervention.”

“If you say so” Blenda responded a little weary of the plan but it was the best thing they had to go with.

“That’s a good plan for Jason but what are we going to do about Matt and Nay? Don’t you think that’s getting out of hand? I mean I know that they're the closest out of all of us, but don’t you think that they’re a little too close?” Hailey voiced her concerns, also addressing the ever present elephant in the room.

“That’s just Matt and Nay being Matt and Nay, I think it’s fine” Jamie spoke “They’ve been like that since we were ten.” She explained, out of all of the girls, Jamie and Nay were the only two that had known all the guys since they were children.

“I know, but don’t you think it's a bit much?”

“I don’t mind it, I think its cute” Blenda stated “Besides, Jason’s an asshat so I really don’t care.” Jamie couldn’t help but to bust out laughing from her friend’s comment because the feeling was mutual.

“I don’t think its a problem, even if there was something more going on, the two of them are too respectful to cross a line like that. Besides Matt just sees Nay as a little sister.” Abrianna spoke and Jamie mentally snorted at how wrong her friend was. There were just some things that only Jamie knew and kept to herself, there was no point in bringing up high school now.

“So this means, we all agree not to say anything until the vacations over unless we have to?” Hailey asked for confirmation.

The other three nodded in agreement. They’d all rather focus on their friend’s issues rather than address their own.

Notes

Hello lovelies!

This is actually a re-write of my story Vows that I made back in 2008. I'm super excited to be writing this again and changing it up, now that my writing has improved. Anyway thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy this.