On Tour

“Shh calm down baby, it’s okay,“ Matt’s voice sounded as his fingers ran over her body in a soothing way. “It is?“ He smiled at her, his dimples prominent. His lip ring reflected the light of the elephant shaped lamp Karma had on her nightstand since their first time in Thailand.

“Everything’s gonna be alright, honey,“ he reassured her again. “I love you,“ those words left her lips easily as they were true. “Please don’t leave me.“

“I have no reason to, do I?“
“He touched me, Matt. Alex. He touched me,“ she whispered, so ashamed of herself.
“You’re dirty. I don’t want you no more.“ His grin subsided, and he stared at her coolly, just like he’d always done before they were a thing.

Suddenly Trey was next to him, standing right at her bed. “Karma, those circumstances were unfortunate, I know. But you’re gonna have to keep recording with Alex. Do it for your career, come on.“

Matt looked at her. His eyes pierced right through her. “Is the kid his? TELL ME RIGHT NOW,“ he bellowed, then chewed anxiously on his lip ring as he waited for an answer.

“Yeah Karma, that’s not gonna be good for your career. Get rid of it! Get rid of it soon!“

Karma sat upright in her bed. She breathed heavily. Her - well technically Matt’s - t-shirt was soaked with sweat. What the fuck happened?

I am in London, she reassured herself. Matt took out his lip ring months ago. I don’t have my elephant lamp anymore. I am in London. It’s all good.

She took some minutes to calm down, then finally drifted into a dreamless sleep again. Finally.
When she woke up, she felt more energized than ever in the last couple of months. She saw clearer. Time to regain control over my life again, I'd say, she thought, then pressed the short-dial button on her phone.

“Miss Smith?“ The receptionist asked as she walked up to Karma, and it took her a second to realize it was her who was meant. She’d gotten so used to being called Strikes. “Doctor Tomlins will see you now. Did you place your urine sample in the hatch?“

Karma thanked the young woman, then slowly made her way to the gynecologist’s office. The dream had been too much for he last night. She just couldn’t bear not knowing what was going on with her body, the only thing about her life that she seemed to be able to control these days.

So she’d called Trey and told him she would not come back to the studio with Alex that day, or ever again. Including the reason why. He was understanding and said he would make sure the issue would be settled swiftly.

“Good morning, Miss Smith,“ the doctor, a red-haired woman who didn’t appear to be much older than Karma herself greeted her. “I’m Doctor Tomlins and we’ll be checking you out today, alright? Just, as this is your first and only appointment with us today as I’ve been told, I want you to know that I want you to feel comfortable. If there’s anything you don’t want, please tell me.“

Karma nodded. “Alright, so why are you here for? What’s your emergency?“ The woman asked her. “Uhm, I haven’t been getting my period for some weeks,“ she said awkwardly.

“Alright, that is a serious issue. Well, Miss Smith,“ the doctor said as she fondled with a pen, “we can definitely rule out pregnancy.“
Wait, so no baby? “A-are you sure?“ She asked.

“Definitely. We did a test with your sample. And I’ve just been notified through my computer that it turned out negative. Why are you so shocked, were you trying?“ God, no. But still…
“God, no. I don’t know, it was just the first thing I thought of.“ The woman chuckled. “Do you want to know the first thing I think of?“ Karma nodded.

“Well, you’re gonna have to step on the scale for me, but judging just from the way you look you’re definitely underweight. And uh, I do know who you are besides Kara Smith, and I reckon you have a lot of stress, too. That’s what influences your period.“

“But… I’m fat, can’t you see?“ She let out, and the doctor threw her a compassionate smile. “Just what I thought, you probably have anorexia nervosa. I, uh, I can’t diagnose that, though. I'm just a gynecologist.“

“I don’t have an eating disorder,“ Karma protested, knowing exactly what the latin term that sounded like a death sentence to her meant. “I’ve just been on a strict diet…“

“Which is unhealthy, Miss Smith. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you. But from my point of view as a gynecologist, I can definitely tell you if you keep on dieting like this, your chances of conceiving naturally at any point later in your life are very slim.“
What? How dare she?

Out. I need out. That was the only thing she could think about. That woman must be wrong. “I’m sorry. Thanks for your time,“ she said, sounding ruder than she wanted to. She got up and walked out of the door, ignoring the doctor’s objections behind her.

“I’m not pregnant. That is a good thing,“ she told herself. All else could be settled, right?
For the next hours, Karma walked around the city in a terrible state. She did not realize what was going on around her, and all she could think about was Matt. What was he doing? What was he even thinking?

Suddenly, the vibration of her phone in her pocket ripped her out of her trance. It was Trey. With trembling fingers, she pressed the green button, then raised the phone to her ear to listen.

“Karma,“ he said, sounding business-like as ever, as if nothing had happened to her, “I confronted Alex’ management with your observations, and they made us an offer you’ll hopefully agree to. I think it’s a good one, but it’s up to you.“

She swallowed, not entirely sure she was feeling up to talking about it all with Trey. “I’m listening.“

“If you don’t press charges and sign an NDA he’s gonna finish the songs for you, should be enough for an album. He’s gonna lend the record his name so it’s gonna sell and he’s down to only getting ten percent of the money we’re making with it. He used to want 35. This is good, Karma.“

She heard Trey breathe heavily at the other end of the line, then did what her guts told her to do. “Alright. You're signing the NDA for me. I’m going back to Avenged now, and you’re not calling me with Karma stuff until the end of the tour. And 7 days after.“

“Alright, whatever you wish,“ Trey’s prompt response came.
“And whatever you’re planning for after this tour, slow it down a little, alright?“
“Sure. But about those rumors with Matt, I just… Text me when you’re going out. Trust me, that would be so-“

Karma cut him off. “Not happening. You hear me? NOT FUCKING HAPPENING.“
“Whatever you wish. Bye.“ But she didn’t even say anything anymore. She just pressed the red button, already holding her arm out for a cab.

“To the airport, please.“
She thought about Matt, and how amazing it would feel to be back in his arms. Just like coming home.

It was only then that she realized what was quietly playing on the radio.

“I’m coming home,
I’m coming home,
Tell the world I’m coming home
Let the rain wash away
All the pain of yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits,
And they’ve forgiven my mistakes
I’m coming home,
I’m coming home,
Tell the world I’m coming…“

Her lips curled into the slightest smile as she thought about Matt. I made the right decision, and he is gonna be so proud of me. I never have to face that Alex again. Everything is going to be alright.

And even though the plane was ready for departure, she still pulled out her phone and switched it on, suddenly feeling the urge to text him.

I'm coming home. To you. I love you and I'm sorry for what I put us through. -k

His prompt response came only a minute later, right before Karma was approached by a flight attendant asking her to switch off the phone already.

I love you and I missed you. I get that you always dreamed of a career and I was a selfish jerk for not supporting you. Please understand that I only wanted more of your time, not to put obstacles in your way. I'm sorry for being a greedy asshole and I can't wait to see my favorite girl. Yours forever, M.

Even after having one of the worst days in my life, she thought, he can make me smile. I never ever thought that possible. I'm so happy I gave him a chance.

Then the flight attendant came to her seat again, asking her if she wanted some food. And this sucks, too, she thought as she looked down at her skinny thighs, I said I'm coming home.

“Yeah, I'll take the pasta, please. And some chocolates if possible."

Notes

Thanks for your comments about the last chapter. :) Hope you enjoy this one.

Looks like things are going back to good - but is it gonna stay this way?