Give Me A Reason

On tour, nights that the band had hotel rooms were few and far between, even now, with more popularity and sponsorship than in years past. And so, when they did get hotel rooms, and the chance to escape the monotonous confines of the tour bus, they reveled in the space, the quiet. The unlimited hot water.

Ironically, though their rooms always had two beds, more often than not the sharing pairs would end up in one bed, enjoying the comfort and warmth of another body. The room to actually fit another body next to their own.

Matt and Zack were sharing this particular night and, like most times they shared a room, had gravitated to one of the beds. Matt was spooned in close against Zack’s back, a strong arm curled protectively around his middle. He pressed a contented, dimpled smile into the back of Zack’s neck and the messy hair hanging there, feeling the guitarist’s fingers trailing feather light over that arm, tracing inked images from memory.

The smile didn’t stay long though. Despite having a hotel room, despite being warm and comfortable and pressed close to one of his best friends… Thoughts were plaguing him. Those thoughts. The ones that had been with him for the last week. Taunting and twisting and all but driving him insane. He’d lost the bet. He’d fucking lost the bet and now he had to blow Brian. But the lead guitarist hadn’t said anything about it since that night and the anxiety was pushing him towards the breaking point. Couldn’t he have just fucking gotten it over with?

He sighed heavily, his breath warm and moist against Zack’s skin and the smaller man blinked his eyes open sleepily. Zack knew the sound of that sigh. Having known Matt for so long, he could generally read the vocalist’s moods simply by glancing at him. To him, the sigh was like a proclamation.

“What’s wrong, Shads?”

Matt didn’t answer right away, instead tightening his arm a little, tucking himself in a bit closer to Zack’s back. He thought over the question for a few moments before sighing again, mumbling.

“Do you think he forgot?”

It didn’t take Zack long to figure out what he was talking about. He chuckled, rubbing a bit more firmly over Matt’s arm. “I don’t think any of us will ever forget that night, Matt.”

Matt grumbled. He was afraid he’d hear something like that. “Then why… I mean, he hasn’t even said anything…”

Zack smiled softly, even though Matt couldn’t see the expression and shifted his hand down, lacing his fingers with the vocalist’s larger ones, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. “Don’t worry about it Matt. You know how Syn is. He does things when he wants to do them and not a second before. He probably just wants you to think that’s he’s gonna make a big fuckin’ production out of it or something.” He yawned widely, snuggling back against Matt, letting his eyes close again.

“Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of.” Matt mumbled sourly, tucking his head down and closing his own eyes, sleep closing in fast. His last words were slurred slightly as his mind finally gave in to unconsciousness. “I just wish he’d fucking get it over with…”

~*~

He got his wish three days later.

They were all lounging on the bus after a show, drinking and laughing together, winding down from the high that always came with performing in front of thousands of screaming fans. They’d changed out of their stage outfits and were sprawled in the more comfortable clothes they generally wore to bed.

Matt had finally been able to put the bet and it’s consequences out of his mind. It was always easier to relax when he was sharing a few drinks with his friends. Later he’d see the irony.

Brian was busy regaling them with stories about the girls at the Meet and Greet. Or more specifically, the two girls who had managed to draw him away from the rest of the group enough to proposition him without everyone else hearing.

Jimmy was in hysterics. “They just fuckin’ tried to rape you, or what?”

Brian laughed, shaking his head. “No, they didn’t touch me, thank God. They were trying to be all subtle and shit, got me to move closer to the wall by asking for a picture. Then the one was all like ‘Oh, Syn, you’re so awesome. We totally want to fuck you.’” He raised his voice into a falsetto for effect, nearly making Zack spit his beer out. “And the other one was like ‘Yeah, you can do both of us. We’ll blow your mind. Wanna get out of here?’”

Zack was snickering while Johnny pouted. “Dude. Why don’t chicks ever hit on me?”

Matt just snorted, shaking his head at the lot of them. “Were they at least hot?”

Brian made a face and shrugged, taking a long drink from his bottle. “Eh. Heavy on the makeup. Cleavage all over the fuckin’ place. I think they were trying to look about ten years younger than they actually were. And dude, that’s way to fucking close to a mental image of my step-mom.”

That had Jimmy giggling again, an arm wrapped around his flat stomach, trying to ward off the ache from laughing so hard. “Fuck. You could have let them suck you off in the bathroom or something.”

Zack was picking on Johnny, dodging swats as he sing-songed ‘Johnny can’t get laid’ over and over again.

Matt watched Brian grimace again, a brow lifting as the guitarist cut his eyes over to look at him, expression morphing into a smirk. Suddenly, he understood how a rodent must feel, just before the snake that was staring at them struck.

“I can think of someone else’s lips I’d much rather have wrapped around my dick. Can’t you, Matty?” His voice was entirely too sweet. It didn’t stay that way, instead deepening into a familiar dark growl that was etched into all of their memories. Suddenly, every one of them was paying rapt attention. “I think you owe me something.”

Fuck. ShitdamnfucksonofabitchfuckingcocksuckingwhoreFUCK.

Matt paled as four pairs of eyes settled on him and he had to set his bottle down before his nerveless fingers dropped it. He couldn’t help but watch as Brian set his own bottle down on the small table at his end of the couch. He watched the guitarist slouch down low on the cushions, shoulders barely propped against the back, knees spread wide, those damned pants riding low, showing off a strip of tanned flesh where his shirt rode up.

He licked his lips nervously, eyes darting around the lounge in something akin to panic. Jimmy was slouching now too, having abandoned his bottle in favor of clasping his hands behind his head, watching Matt through half lidded eyes, a little smirk playing over his lips. Zack and Johnny were leaning against each other, their bickering forgotten in favor or eyeing the vocalist with interest. Not one of his friends appeared to spare any thought towards saving him from his fate.

And why should they? He’d lost the fucking bet. That stupid, motherfucking bet…

He sighed deeply, eyes dragging back over the Brian. He was still watching him with a self-satisfied smirk. Why hadn’t this seemed like a big deal right after he’d lost?

“Come on Matty, time to pay up.” His voice was still overly sweet, but there was an underlying edge. He wasn’t going to let Matt out of this. And Matt was too proud to ask.

He could hear Jimmy’s low chuckle as he moved to slide numbly to the floor and he knew those blue eyes were sparkling darkly. Trust the fucker to get off on this shit. He knew, in the back of his mind, that he was just being bitter. If it was anyone else in this position, he’d be watching hungrily, just as his band mates were. He looked up at Brian from between the guitarist’s spread knees, but couldn’t hold that smirking gaze for more than a few seconds.

Brian shifted his hips a little, lifting them faintly, giving Matt room to slip his pants down. He settled back onto the cushions after the large hands had tugged them out of the way automatically. He didn’t let his smirk slip, but he watched Matt carefully. Something seemed off. Sure, he wouldn’t be surprised if the other man was pissy about it. He’d lost a bet after all and this was the consequence. But Matt didn’t seem annoyed or put upon. He looked fucking terrified.

He continued to watch Matt, smirk faltering a little. As soon as his pants had slipped down, Matt had dropped his hands into his own lap, just staring at Brian’s cock, seeming rooted to the floor. Getting impatient, Brian shifted his hips a bit, trying to break the other man out of his trance.
“Come on Matt, are you gonna blow me or not?”

Matt’s hands moved to rest lightly on Brian’s thighs, but he didn’t move otherwise. Brian opened his mouth again to complain, because fuck, he was getting annoyed now, but then Matt’s lost hazel eyes lifted to meet his own, suddenly so child-like and it was his turn to be frozen in place.

“I don’t know how.”

His words were soft; barely a whisper and Brian had to strain to hear them. He stared down at the larger man blankly, again opening his mouth to say something but no words would come. He wanted to laugh. To tell Matt to stop fucking around and get busy. But there was no mischief in that expression, no playfulness in those eyes. Just frightened honesty and Brian began to think then, to really think about it. He’d watched people go down on Matt plenty of times. Hell, he’d been one of them. But… Never had he seen Matt suck anyone off. Which he really hadn’t considered too carefully because, hey, Matt could be the private type. Sometimes. But now he knew better.

Brian lifted a hand, running if over his face. “Fuck.”

Matt watched from where he knelt on the floor, fidgeting slightly. He could see the realization dawning on Brian’s face and with it, a deep blush spread over his own. Well now he knew. Now he could open his big fat, fucking mouth and laugh and the other guys would laugh and he’d be completely humiliated-

“Matt.”

His eyes snapped back to find deep brown fixed on him, a hand lightly touching his cheek. The laughing he was waiting for never came. Instead Brian just offered him a soft smile, his voice quiet, just low enough to not carry over to the other three.

“It’s okay. You’ve had people suck you off right?” He continued after the hesitant nod. “Just do what feels good. You’ll know if I like it. Careful with your teeth and don’t take too much too fast. Alright?”

Matt nodded again, a wave of relief washing through him. Brian wasn’t going to make fun of him. Maybe, just maybe he’d survive this after all. Taking a deep, steadying breath, he leaned in, eyes again falling to Brian’s cock. He led with a hand, reaching out to wrap his fingers around the semi-hard length, rubbing slowly. An earthy, musky scent assaulted him and he recognized it at once as sex and Brian, a smell he was familiar with, but never had he smelled it quite this strong before. It was comforting and intoxicating all at once and despite his apprehension, he flicked his tongue out curiously to swipe over the tip of Brian’s cock.

Before he could even register what it tasted like, Brian’s low groan had him doing it again.
He wasn’t exactly sure why, but having Matt’s tongue on him felt better than anything he’d experienced in a long time. Maybe it was just knowing that he was the first. The first Matt had ever tasted, the first his tongue would trace, the first he’d have his mouth filled with. He slid the hand that had never left Matt’s cheek upwards, running through his short hair, silently encouraging.

Brian tasted a little like he smelled. Earthy, musky, a little salty, with an underlying spice that Matt decided suited him perfectly. It’s wasn’t bad really. He shuffled a little closer to settle more comfortably, so he wouldn’t have to lean over as far. He rolled his eyes up and watched Brian’s face this time as his tongue swept out to taste, rolling slowly, beginning to explore rather than simply touch, rubbing as he gained confidence. Dark eyes, half shaded by heavy lids watched him back. Brian was beautiful like this, and he was entranced, taking in how his jaw clenched slightly with each flick of Matt’s tongue, the way he inhaled sharply through his nose when he found a sensitive spot and let the breath out again through faintly parted lips a moment later.

And suddenly, suddenly Matt understood. He understood why Zack and Johnny enjoyed this. Why Brian and Jimmy were able to get their way every damn time their lips wrapped around someone’s cock. He wasn’t being used, submitting like a whore. He was powerful. He controlled Brian, wrung reactions from him with each flick of his tongue, every tightening of his fingers. And with that realization, Matt wrapped his lips around the head of Brian’s cock and sucked.

Brian bit his lips hard enough to taste blood, trying, fighting with every scrap of his control to keep his hips on the cushion. He couldn’t keep from tossing his head back though and when he felt the tip of Matt’s tongue pressing and wriggling against the slit at the tip of his cock, he groaned harshly, shuddering. He shouldn’t be able to do that so fucking quick and Brian had not been expecting it. He wasn’t going to be able to last nearly as long as he’d anticipated but, with his thoughts dissolving and his nerves fraying, he couldn’t bring himself to care.

Matt moved his hands to Brian’s hips, gripping them firmly. He hadn’t thought about it before, but Brian could buck up at any time and probably fucking choke him to death with his cock. So not the way he wanted to die. He concentrated as he lowered his head, carefully taking more into his mouth, pulling back when it started to get uncomfortable. Brian had been right. Slow and careful and he was doing alright; better than alright if the sounds from above were any indication. He added a little more suction as he slid up again, relishing the strangled gasp he was rewarded with. He tightened the grip he had with one hand, the other leaving in favor of palming his own erection through his pants, releasing a sigh through his nose.

He was floating in a haze, the whole room looked a little fuzzy, just a bit out of focus. He let his head loll to the side, eyes sliding around absently. Matt’s rhythm was slow as he learned the reactions of Brian’s body and while he knew he had to let the vocalist move at his own pace, he was dying to find some form of relief. Matt’s inexpert, but more than competent tongue was driving him to distraction and his control was wearing thin.

His eyes came to rest on the other three occupants of the room, roaming over them lazily. Jimmy hadn’t moved, still slouched down, hands still bent and clasped behind his head. Zack’s hand was wrapped around his cock though, stroking languidly and the drummer grinned lopsidedly at him when their eyes met. Zack sat in the middle, pose very similar to Jimmy’s save for his hands. One wrapped around the lanky drummer’s cock, the other around the short bassist’s. Johnny had his hand on Zack and the three sighed and groaned in tandem, hips pressed close together, watching the display before them eagerly.

Brian felt sharp teeth drag up the underside of his cock and his eyes flashed wide, snapping down to Matt. He parted his lips to say something snarky about being careful until he met sparkling hazel eyes. The fucker had done it on purpose. Apparently Matt didn’t appreciate it when he felt ignored. The words died on his lips and a groan took their place when he felt Matt’s far-too-talented tongue sooth over the same path his teeth had taken, a flash of dimples showing despite his full mouth.

If he was going to do this, then Brian was damn well going to have his eyes on him, not wandering aimlessly around the room. He held that gaze and understood Jimmy’s fetish for eye contact. He truly got to work then, sinking down as far as he dared and hollowing his cheeks as he sucked, hard and demanding, confidence only growing when Brian arched and hissed. Apparently he’d made his point though. Brian never broke his eyes away from Matt’s.

Fuck. He was going to die. He was going to die and explode and burn from the inside out and he didn’t fucking care. Just as long as Matt never stopped, kept moving his tongue like that, sucking him hard, harder that most people with six times his experience would. He lashed his other hand out, settling it next to the first on Matt’s head, holding tight, not pulling, but looking to anchor himself, to keep from falling apart.

Matt groaned in satisfaction. He liked those hands on him, holding on like he was the most important thing in Brian’s life, like he held all the answers to the Universe’s most vital questions. He moved his own hand faster, letting another low sound rumble through his throat, working the vibrations over Brian’s cock. He could feel the guitarist trembling faintly, his muscles beginning to tense, and he was going over with him.

Those vibrations had him whimpering softly, a sound he normally wouldn’t be caught dead making, but Matt never did play by the rules. He chewed at his lower lip, trying to stifle more of the little noises and finally he just gave in, too far gone to care. And the words, unbidden but always there on the tip of his tongue, came spilling out.

“Oh, fuck, Matt… Right there, Matt, fuck! Don’t stop, baby, please, don’t ever fucking stop…”

He shuddered, drawing in a sharp breath through his nose. If sucking Brian off hadn’t already had him hard as a fucking rock, that would have done it. He needed to get Brian off now or he’d be the first to finish. His own pleasure was a just a perk of the deal; he was going to make sure Brian got his first.

His eyes were clouded and unfocused but still held Matt’s, his fingers holding tight and as soon as he felt Matt’s tongue start a dizzying spiral up the head of his cock to swipe roughly over the very tip, he started tugging, trying to get his mouth off of him, not entirely sure Matt would want to try swallowing his first time.

“Fuck, Matt! Yes, God, fuckfuckfuckFUCK-”

Time seemed to slow and Matt could see it. He could see it coming and the moment just before it hit. He saw Brian’s muscles tense, his abdomen and thighs tremble faintly and he bore down harshly, gripping the guitarist’s hip hard enough to bruise and pinned him firmly to the couch. At the same time he hollowed his cheeks a final time. It was barely a second later that his mouth was flooded by slick, hot saltiness and then he was coming too and trying to keep enough awareness about himself to keep from choking.

There was a faint ache of pain from his hip added to the mix of impossible pleasure and the almost too tight suction and he shattered. He pushed hard against the hand, but he couldn’t hope to move against that strength and instead his back arched away from the couch, bowing into a perfect arc as he came, screaming Matt’s name, nothing touching the cushions from his hips to the top of is head. It felt like it lasted forever and he was sure that he’d blacked out at some point, the shuddering and pulsing and, fuck, the heat too much. The next thing he knew, he was collapsing, boneless, back against the couch, a roaring in his ears signaling that sound was gradually returning to the world.

Matt slowly pulled away, watching the spent guitarist with dark eyes. This, he decided, was a view he could get used to. He sat back on his heels, giving Brian a chance to scrape together a few of the scattered pieces of his mind before moving again, nudging him upwards gently.
Brian moved reluctantly, shifting up into more of a sitting position at Matt’s insistence, still not entirely with it, though his eyes were slowly focusing again. He watched curiously as the larger man got up and slipped into his lap, straddling his legs. He slipped his arms loosely around Matt’s waist, watching the vocalist lean in and, like a light switch coming back on, realized he wanted a kiss.

With a little smile, Brian sat up to meet him, relaxing against the hand that found the back of his head, lips parting as soon as they touched their counterpart’s. A slick tongue flicked past and suddenly his mouth was flooded with warm, thick liquid. His eyes snapped open in shock but the hand at the back of his head held him in place until he swallowed reflexively. Only then did it allow him to pull back. A single shimmering strand of white stretched between their lips like a strand of spider’s silk for a split second before breaking away and Matt’s tongue swiped out to clean the remnants of the surprise gift away. Brian stared up at the vocalist.

Matt just grinned down at him, all dimples and mischief and satisfaction. Brian shook his head, leaning back against the couch heavily and smacked Matt’s ass half heartedly, unable to keep his own grin from breaking through. “You dirty little whore.”

Matt laughed, slipping from Brian’s lap to settle next to him, tugging the guitarist close until he was tucked against his side, snuggled in with his head on the larger man’s chest. They glanced over at the other couch, chuckling to each other.

Jimmy had barely moved, though one of his hands was settled in Zack’s lap, languidly rubbing over a thigh. Johnny was tucked in tightly to Zack’s side, all but mirroring Brian’s own position and Zack was licking his fingers clean like an overly satisfied cat. They had obviously all gotten off, though neither Matt nor Brian could remember hearing them, having been too wrapped up in their own experience.

“Matt.” Jimmy. “Dude, what the fuck? Why’ve I never gotten a piece of that?” The other two murmured a soft agreement.

Matt and Brian glanced at each other, the guitarist smirking slowly. He made no move to answer though and in that moment, Matt loved him more than he ever had in his life. Matt was the one who finally spoke, a soft look in his eyes as he slipped a hand lightly over Brian’s cheek in thanks, never breaking their gaze. Brian’s smirk shifted to a rare, honest smile, eyes warm, understanding.

“I guess you just never gave me the right reason.”

Notes