Don't You Dare

What felt like days, but was merely hours later, Brian ran through the hospital doors in Phoenix. He wasn’t even sure how he had made it there in one piece. Once the plane landed, his mind and body went into autopilot, not focusing on anything other than getting to Aubrey. He didn’t remember renting a car, he didn’t remember GPS-ing how to get to the hospital, and he sure as hell didn’t remember any part of the drive there. But now that he was in such close proximity to Aubrey, he was hyper aware of everything around him.

Once in the lobby, Brian slowed to a halt as he looked around frantically, not knowing where the hell to go next. Dammit, he should’ve asked the nurse where Aubrey would be or where he should go to find her.

“Can I help you, sir?”

Brian whipped around and saw that the offer came from an older woman sitting behind the front desk, eager to help him.

“My girlfriend is in surgery, she was in a car accident, she was brought to the Emergency Room, I know she’s here but I don’t know where to go,” he rattled.

Later, he would remember how easily the words ‘my girlfriend’ flowed out of his mouth without a second thought, how natural it felt to call her that even after the two-month separation, but at the moment, he just wanted to find Aubrey, to know if she was okay.

“She’s likely on the third floor,” the woman informed him calmly then pointed behind him. “Elevators are through those double doors.”

Brian took off in that direction. After the longest elevator ride of his life, he finally reached the third floor and walked out, stalking over to the big main desk to see if he was in the right location. But before he could even reach a nurse to inquire about Aubrey, someone called his name.

“Brian!”

He whipped his head to the side to see Lauren standing up from her chair in the waiting area. He changed direction and hurried over to her.

“Where is she?” Brian asked, pulling Lauren in for a hug despite the fact that he hardly knew her. “Is she okay?”

He felt Lauren nod against his chest then pull out of his embrace. “She’s out of surgery. They were able to stop the bleeding and stabilize her, but they’ve got her in a medically induced coma.”

“A coma?!” Brian shouted, garnering the attention of a few others in the waiting room, but he didn’t care.

“It’s okay,” she soothed. “The doctor reassured me that it’s a common protocol, and it’s just for a few days so that she can rest and her body can heal from all the trauma. Otherwise she’d be in a lot of pain and wouldn’t be able to rest.”

He nodded. “She’s okay?” Brian asked again, needing her to reiterate it and actually say the words. He didn’t know shit about medical jargon and he needed to be blatantly told that Aubrey would be okay.

“She’s okay,” Lauren confirmed verbally. “She’s still in the recovery room, but we can see her as soon as she’s in her own room.”

He exhaled a deep breath, as if he had been holding it in for the last few hours and was finally overcome with enough relief that he could breathe normally again. Feeling like his eyesight was getting hazy, he blinked a few times. He was either about to pass out or about to cry - or both.

“Have you talked to her brother?” Brian wondered, clearing his throat and regaining his composure. He wanted to make sure that all the right people had been notified.

“I talked to him earlier. He’s in Minnesota for work, but he should be here in the morning.”

Brian nodded, then finally sunk into the chair beside him before his damn knees gave out.

“You okay?” Lauren wondered.

“I am now,” Brian exhaled again as he hunched forward, resting his elbows on his knees and putting his face in his hands.

She couldn’t help but smile softly at him as she took a seat beside him. She was not happy with him for how he left her best friend two months ago and how he hadn’t talked to her since, but she was reminded of how much he loved Aubrey after witnessing the panic on his face when he arrived and now the relief on his face knowing that she was going to be okay.

It was obvious that Brian had not moved on and she knew Aubrey hadn’t either. They were two stubborn little shits who loved each other so fiercely and were simply trying to navigate a difficult long-distance relationship.

Not many words were exchanged between Brian and Lauren as they waited, but it was comforting for both of them to not be alone.

Brian pulled out his phone, realizing he had never turned it back on after his flight. After a few moments of loading, his screen lit up with over two dozen texts and missed calls. He ignored the missed calls but checked the messages. A majority of the texts came from the band group chat (which included Val).

Valary D.
9:45 PM
Bri, I know you’re probably in the air right now but please give us an update as soon as you can. We’re all worried.

Johnny S.
9:47 PM
Uhh what did I miss?

Valary D.
9:48 PM
Aubrey was in a car accident. Brian’s on his way to Phoenix to be with her.

Johnny S.
9:50 PM
WTF. Why didn’t anyone tell me? Is she okay?

Valary D.
9:55 PM
Not really sure yet.

Jimmy S.
9:59 PM
She better be okay

Jimmy S.
9:59 PM
I’m gonna kick her fucking ass if she’s not okay

Matt S.
10:03 PM
We’re all here for you guys, dude. Whatever you need, let us know.

Zack B.
10:05 PM
What Matt said. Update us when you can.

Brian quickly typed out a message, knowing his friends were probably waiting for an update. He didn’t know that Zack had texted Lauren earlier, too impatient to wait for a response from Brian.

Brian H.
11:57 PM
Aubrey’s out of surgery. She’s in recovery. She’s in a medically induced coma for a few days so her body can rest and heal but I don’t think it’s as bad as it sounds. We’re waiting for her to get into her own room so we can see her. I’ll update you guys more when I can talk to the doctor myself and actually see that Aubrey is okay with my own two eyes.

Before any of his friends could respond, he shoved his phone back in his pocket. He appreciated all their concern and support, but he just didn’t feel like dealing with the inevitable onslaught of questions that would come after the text he just sent.

“What even happened?” Brian asked.

“What do you mean?” Lauren asked, unsure of what he was asking.

“The accident,” Brian explained. “What happened? Why did Aubrey wreck?”

“Drunk driver hit her head on,” Lauren answered sadly.

“What?” Brian turned to face her, his brow furrowing in confusion and anger. “It happened at eight o’clock at night!”

“I know,” Lauren replied. “More than twice the legal limit. At eight in the evening.”

Brian’s jaw tightened as his hands curled into fists.

“Is the motherfucker in jail?” He asked through gritted teeth. Holy shit, he had to control himself before he punched a hole in the hospital wall, which would undoubtedly cause a huge unnecessary scene. But he was seething, fuming, seeing red. Who fucking drives drunk at 8 in the evening?

“From what I understand, this isn’t his first offense, so yeah, he’s in a jail,” Lauren answered.

“Good,” Brian muttered, settling back into his seat, trying to calm down. “Piece of shit.”

For a moment, he thought about all the times he and his idiot friends had driven drunk. It was so stupid and it had been years since he had been so careless, but he had done it before. They all had.

Fuck, he could’ve hurt someone. He could’ve put some innocent woman in the hospital, put her innocent boyfriend in the waiting room, feeling the exact same anguish that he was feeling. He could’ve fucking killed someone.

He felt sick. What a fucking reality check.

Just then, a doctor walked into the waiting room toward them.

“Miss Dane,” the woman greeted, speaking to Lauren.

Lauren quickly stood and Brian did the same.

“Dr. Grant, this is Brian,” Lauren introduced. “Aubrey’s boyfriend.”

Brian silently thanked Lauren for calling him that. She had no idea how badly he needed to hear that.

“Nice to meet you,” the doctor replied, extending her hand. “I’m the surgeon who operated on Aubrey.”

“Thank you for taking care of her,” Brian said, shaking the woman’s hand. He felt bile rise up his throat at the thought of this woman’s hands inside of Aubrey’s cut open body, the same hand that he was holding and shaking. He quickly let go. “How is she?”

“I just checked on her before I came to see you guys,” Dr. Grant began. “She’s doing well. She’s out of post-op and in her own room, so you guys are more than welcome to go see her.”

“What room is she in?” Brian quickly asked.

Dr. Grant chuckled softly. “Follow me, I’ll show you where she is.”

The doctor led them straight to Aubrey’s room, which was around the corner and down a long hallway.

“A nurse will be by shortly to check on her and answer any questions you may have,” Dr. Grant stated.

“Thank you,” Lauren said before the doctor walked away.

She turned to face Brian, who was standing in front of the door, simply staring at it.

“You want to go in first?” Lauren asked.

“It’s okay,” he shook his head. “We can go in together.”

Brian opened the door and saw only a curtain. He hesitated for a moment, so Lauren moved the curtain back gently, as if she were trying to be quiet, and revealed Aubrey in her hospital bed.

Brian’s forehead wrinkled in what looked like pain.

“Jesus,” he inhaled sharply, taking in the awful sight as he walked over to her bed.

He moved some hair out of her face as he examined her. Tubes were everywhere, branching off of Aubrey’s body and connecting to the machines that surrounded her, which were beeping softly and making weird swooshing noises. She had a gash on her hairline which was stitched up and beginning to bruise as well as cuts along her cheeks. Her eyes looked sunken in and her usually plump and pink lips looked pale and thin.

“It almost doesn’t even look like her,” Lauren said softly.

She was right. It hardly looked like his Aubrey, his AC, his sweet Texan girl in Phoenix. It made his heart hurt. But the only thing he cared about, at the moment, was that Aubrey was alive and would ultimately be okay.

Ø

Lauren stayed until nearly 2 in the morning, but only one person could stay the night with Aubrey and visiting hours were technically over (the hospital staff made an exception since Aubrey wasn’t in her own room until after midnight), so she went home to get some sleep, promising to return first thing in the morning to check on her best friend. She exchanged phone numbers with Brian, so he could provide updates and she could check on Aubrey.

When the nurse came around half an hour later to check all of Aubrey’s vitals, Brian was sitting on the small couch next to her bed, simply staring at her, watching her chest rise and fall, watching intently for any signs that something might be wrong, still not fully feeling relief yet. He had watched enough hospital shows on TV to know that things could take a turn for the worse at any minute.

“Hi, I’m Shelly, I’ll be Aubrey’s overnight nurse,” the nurse introduced. “Are you the husband?”

“Boyfriend,” Brian corrected but extended his hand. “Brian.”

“Nice to meet you,” Shelly greeted with a handshake then turned to all the machines and began pressing buttons. “We usually won’t come around this late into the night if we don’t have to, but since she wasn’t set up in her room until recently, we may be in and out at weird times at first.”

“That’s okay,” Brian brushed off, his gaze going back to Aubrey, watching her face intently. “There’s no way I’ll be able to sleep anyway.”

Shelly glanced over her shoulder at him for a moment then turned back to the machines. As a nurse, she saw all the stages of grief and concern over loved ones, so she recognized the anguish on his face. “You should try to get some rest while you can. There’s not much you can do for her right now, but she’s gonna rely on you for a lot when she wakes up.”

Brian nodded. He appreciated the sentiment but if Aubrey wasn’t conscious and couldn’t look out for herself then he would have to do it. “How long will she be in the coma?” He wondered.

“It really just depends on how well she’s healing, and the doctor will assess her each morning and each night to make the best call,” Shelly answered as she wrote something down on a clipboard. “She’s had a lot of physical trauma, but the doctors were mostly concerned about the addition of the concussion. Those symptoms can ease up in a matter of days, so I’m hopeful for only maybe three or four days.”

Brian nodded, thankful to know that it wouldn’t last too long. He continued to watch Aubrey, a pained expression still draped his face.

“You know,” Shelly began. “There is one thing you can do for her now.”

“What’s that?” Brian asked quickly, turning his head to look at the nurse, eager to feel useful.

“You can talk to her. Research has shown that it helps recovery,” she answered. “Plus, you’ll start to feel stir crazy after 24 hours, it will help with that too.”

“She can hear me?” Brian wondered, glancing at Aubrey briefly before looking back at Shelly.

“It’s very likely,” she answered. “She probably won’t remember what you say to her when she wakes up, but she can likely hear you and will recognize your voice. Like I said, research has shown that it helps the patient recover better and quicker.”

“Really?” Brian asked.

“Yep. It’ll feel strange at first, talking to someone who doesn’t respond. But just talk to her as you normally would. Tell her stories, read her messages from friends, keep her up to date on what’s going on in the world.”

Brian nodded, slowly processing the advice the nurse was giving to him.

“Someone will be around in a few hours to check on her - and you - but if either of you need anything, just press the call button on her bed,” Shelly stated as she washed her hands.

“Thank you,” Brian replied.

“You’re quite welcome,” she ended as she shut the curtain behind her then slipped out of the door.

Brian stared at Aubrey’s unconscious body for a minute after he heard the door shut. Talk to her? What the hell would he say?

He leaned to the side a little, trying to peek around the curtain, just to be 100% certain that he was alone with her.

“Uhh, so... I know that I need to apologize,” Brian said quietly. “But I don’t want to bring up what happened while you’re trying to get better, so let’s just talk about that later, okay?”

Ugh, did he seriously just ask her a question? He mentally slapped himself in the forehead. He obviously didn’t expect a response but if she could hear him, he didn’t want her to feel bad for not being able to reply.

Okay, so keep her up to date on the world, tell her stories, read her messages from friends...

Brian had an idea.

“Everyone’s pretty worried about you,” he informed her, still talking quietly just in case someone could hear him as he took out his phone and opened the band group messages. “Jimmy said he’s going to kick your ass if you’re not okay, so that’s helpful...” Brian chuckled a little as he scrolled and read through the old and new messages. “They all say they’re here for us. Valary wants to send flowers, go figure. Jimmy thinks that’s an awful idea, so he’s going to send a teddy bear now then some Burger King when you wake up because hospital food clearly sucks.”

Brian glanced up at her. She was pretty banged up but she looked so peaceful and content. So he kept going.

“I don’t know if you even knew that we were recording our new album, but we are,” Brian informed her then looked back at his phone. “Matt said he made some phone calls and they’re gonna go into the studio and do what they can without me, but they’re gonna postpone everything else for at least a week. So, that’s good. I guess I should text them back and give them an update.”

Brian’s fingers began tapping on his screen quickly as he typed out: Aubrey’s doing okay. In her own room now. She’s pretty banged up but mostly just scratches and bruises so nothing permanent. Now we just let her heal and wait for the doctor to give the okay to wake her up. Nurse said I should talk to her so I’m reading everyone’s messages to her.

For a second, Brian wondered if it was a good idea to tell everyone that, as he felt pretty ridiculous doing it already. But then the replies came and he knew he had some amazing friends.

“Well,” Brian began, laughing and trying to keep up with the incoming messages. “Zack is very worried about his head scratches. Johnny wants to know how gnarly you look, but I promise I won’t send him a picture until you’re conscious and tell me that I can. Valary is fussing at me for talking to you at 3 o’clock in the morning instead of letting you rest. I guess that’s a good point.”

He sent a quick reply to everyone, letting them know that he’d update them in the morning, then he put his phone in his pocket. He stood up, walked over to the bed, ran his fingers through her hair lovingly, then leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head.

“Love you, sweet girl,” he muttered into her hair.

And he did. Despite how infuriating she could be, despite how stubborn and strong-willed she could be, despite how absolutely insane she made him feel, he loved the shit outta her. And he was fairly certain that would never change.

Notes

Sorry to scare everyone ;) Thanks for reading and commenting! Love, love, LOVE you guys a ton! <3 &*