You Will Always Be My Heart

Johnny's POV:

The pain of losing Jimmy seemed to only increase every day. There'd always be that moment after waking up each morning before officially coming to that'd I get a call from Jimmy telling me the crazy shit he did last night.

Then I'd fully wake up. It would hit me like a punch to the throat. Jimmy was gone. There would be no call.

I'd never see Jimmy again. He wouldn't be there to cheer me up. There would never be another song written by his gifted hands.

There was a hole were Jimmy used to be in my heart. I couldn't handle the pain any longer. An idea hits me.

My feet take me to the kitchen. The butcher block is in front of me. Reaching forward I grab the biggest knife.

I drag the knife across my wrist. Blood starts gushing immediately. I feel light headed.

My eyes close. Jimmy couldn't be here with me. Then I would have to go join him.

~

I come to. I'm not sure how long I've been out. There's a towel wrapped around my wrist.

"Jonathan Lewis Seward give me one good reason I shouldn't beat your ass." Barbara's voice is clearly unhappy.

"Wh..." My voice comes out all croaky.

"You were supposed to come for dinner tonight." She explains.

Her arms fold across her chest. The floor has to endure her taping foot. She's obviously waiting for my explanation.

"I just couldn't live without him any more." I sob.

Barbara pulls me into her chest. She lets me cry my eyes out. She providers comfort with rubbing my back and whispering words that I really want paying attention to.

I hold on long after my tears had dried up. There weren't enough words to describe how thankful I am for Barbara.

She helps me to my feet. We walk slowly to my living room. Barbara eases me down into my couch.

Her hand holds out a bottle of water. I swallow a mouthful. She sets it back down on the table.

"Don't every do something this stupid again." She orders her hand making contact with the back of my head.

I nod telling her I understood. Also that it wouldn't happen again. The last thing any of us needed was to lose another family member.

Notes