When Skies Are Grae

Matt and I arrive at Brian's. The road to his house reminds me of Georgia, curvy and windy. He lives on top of a mountain in a gigantic log house. We're a little early, but we wanted to help set things up. The same matte black Challenger is parked beneath a carport, along with an 800 Kawasaki Ninja, which is a super bright orange under the light. Other than Brian's vehicles and Matt's, there is only 3 others. A maroon Mercedes Benz, a bright lime green Suzuki GSXR, and an old VW hippie van.

"Well, I see all the guys are here. You still down for what we discussed earlier?" Matt snickers.

"I've never met these guys, other than Brian. I started thinking, I don't want my first impression to come off as a seductive bitch. If they try, I mean, I'll shut them down. I just want to be myself, that's easier."

Matt nods his head, "If that's what you wanna do."

"Am I not an intriguing person when I am myself?" I ask.

"No, that's not what I'm saying."

"You want me to basically throw myself at them and get their hopes up, that's not who I am, at all," I voice, "Why do you wanna do such a thing to your friends?"

"Because they want you. And because you're single, they'll go after you regardless if I'm standing right next to you!"

"Matt, we're not in any sort of a relationship. Guys are gonna flirt whether a girl is with someone or not."

"So, you've developed zero feelings for me since you've been here in Cali?" He questions.

"Of course I have feelings for you."

Matt jumps out of the truck, "If that's so, my guys need to know."

"I can do that without being a fuckin' whore, Matt."

"Who said you had to be a whore?" Matt grabs the bottles of alcohol from the backseat.

"You told me to rub my ass all over them and then tell them that they can't have it," I recall, "what the fuck does that sound like?"

Matt sighs and cracks open the Jack Daniels and turns it up; gulping until the bubbles come up. He slams nearly half a bottle. "They just need to understand that you're mine." Matt takes another swallow.

I'm not someone's piece of property or piece of ass. I don't belong to a certain someone. No one pays taxes on me. I don't come with a title. That's what I felt like saying, but I didn't. I don't know what I've done for Matt to think that I'm his. Yes, he's been amazing since the day I started my life here. But that doesn't make someone your's.

"Look, I'm sorry, but I just don't want one of them to sweep you off your feet tonight and not hear from them ever again. That's how they are." Matt sighs, knowing he's gone a little overboard.

"I appreciate you lookin' out for me. I have no intentions of sleeping with your friends. But as far as you claiming me, we still have a little ways to go. We're not in a relationship just yet."

Matt nods his head, "So, where do we stand?"

His question sort of shocks me for a second or two.

What are we? What would you call two people who like each other and hang out all the time, go to bars together, and have sex? Friends with benefits, maybe? We're more than friends but not super serious.

"I know I like you, alot. I miss you when I haven't heard from or saw you. And there's definitely times when I don't know what I'd do without you. So, what would you call that?" I stare into his beautiful hazel eyes.

"I guess we're in that talking stage. Ya know, when we kinda go a little crazy when we don't have each other's company. When we long for our lips to meet, again. When we get jealous over stupid shit."

I smile. We're talking. There's actual hope of something becoming of us.

Suddenly, a voice starts yelling and gets closer.

"Heyyyyyy! I'm glad to see y'all made it!" Brian approaches.

"We were just grabbing the booze and weed," Matt glances at me, "you ready to go inside?"

"Sure." I agree and jump out of the Dodge.

Brian's eyes scan every inch of my body as I adjust my dress. Matt strides to my side. I lace my fingers with his; he's seems a little surprised. We begin walking to Brian's house.

"Awhhhhh, look at you two! Holding hands like teenagers," he laughs.

Quickly I look at Matt, who is smiling ear to ear. I stop. My hands reach for Matt's face, suddenly, I kiss him. Matt pulls away after a few long seconds, grinning in like a opossum.

Brian rolls his eyes and chuckles.

"Get a room!" he shouts as he storms by.

"Nice." Matt softly mouths.

I smile and let him lead me into the log mansion.

.:. .:. .:. .:.

An hour or two has quickly faded. All of the Avenged guys that I've met have fallen head over heels for me, according to Matt. I've never been to party this big or saw so much alcohol be consumed. I also played beer pong for the first time, which I'm not too shabby at. Matt and I are partners against Brian and Zacky; whom I met when we first got here.

He approached Matt and I as we we're stocking the bar. Zacky and him exchanged a few words while I divides the wines, scotches, whiskeys and vodkas.

.:. .:. .:. .:.

"Mm. Mm. Mmmmm," the man sporting snakebites bit his lip as he looked down at me, "It's definitely a pleasure to finally meet you, Grae." He extended his hand.

I stood up to take his hand, "Nice to meet ya."

"You can call me Zacky, beautiful," he pressed his lips to my hand.

I looked over at Matt, who was fuming. He walked over to my side and handed me a drink. A Washington Apple, to be exact. Cranberry juice and Green Apple Crown Royal; it was mixed just perfectly.

"Thank you," I kissed his cheek.

"Of course."

Zacky looked between us and shook his head, "She's a doll, man."

Matt cockily grinned and looked at me, as if I were a trophy, "Absolutely."

"You're tryna make a homie jealous, huh?" Zacky laughed.

I giggled at his remark.

"Be jealous, bitch," Matt threw an arm around me and smiled playfully; getting exactly as he wanted.

.:. .:. .:. .:.

I was damn near wasted, but I still danced around to the music and sipped on my Jack D and Coke. Zacky walks up and taps my shoulder.

"Would you like to dance?" he grins.

"Sure." I answer with no hesitation.

He moves behind me and places a hand on my hip. We moved along to the beat, eventually grinding. He's actually an excellent dancer.

"Having fun?" Zacky smiles.

"I'm having a blast!" I reply.

He and I dance together until Matt interrupted us three songs later.

"Care if I steal her for a bit?" Matt grins.

"As long as she comes back to dance with me!" Zacky laughs and sips his drink.

"Care to walk with me, Georgia Girl?" Matt streches his hand out to mine.

"Sure." I take his masculine hand.

Matt lightly smacks my ass as I walk past Zack. He leads me outside, past a huge pool, between the trees, and down a little trail.

Where the fuck is he taking me?

About 70 yards down the rock walkway, we near a decent sized wooden cabin. The lights were on and a couple shadows bounced on the walls inside.

"What the fuck is this place?" I stop and release Matt's hand.

"It's just a hangout. There's a few people I'd like for you to meet." Matt turns back to me, taking a big gulp from his bottle of Jameson.

"Y'all ain't out here tryin' to summon Satan are ya?" I giggle.

"Baby, I am the devil." Matt chuckles.

I was hesitant about taking his hand, but I did. I trusted Matt, even when drunk.

"Look, what I'm about to show you might freak you out a little." he stops at the foot way that leads to the porch of the cabin.

"What's goin' on in there?" I curiously ask.

"You just have to see for yourself. You'll thank me later." Matt unlocks the door with a key.

If there are people inside, why is it locked?

Matt opens the door and we step in, quickly shutting the door behind us and locking it back. The sight before my eyes gave me chills yet enticed me. I felt my mouth fly open.

"What the fuck is going on in here?" I look in every direction.

There are people having sex everywhere! A naked woman dances for a man over in a corner, while he jerks himself. A guy snorts a line of something up his nose.

Brian walks over to us, thankfully clothed. "I see you got Grae to come out," he raises his eye brows and grins, "What a surprise."

A man sinks into the leather couch as a woman takes him into her mouth. Another woman is passed out in a chair with a needle in her arm.

I shake my head, I can't wrap my head around all this, these people don't even mind that you're watching. People are doing hard drugs. A woman next to us let's out a loud gasp as the man behind her thrusts himself into her.

I throw my hand over my mouth and unlock the door; I sprint out and don't look back. I run and run, til I find myself in Matt's truck. The images I just saw replayed in my disturbed mind.

Why would he take me there? I had absolutely no business being in that fucked up cabin. I could've been still dancing with Zacky and not even known of it's existence! He been missing for about an hour and I bet he's been locked up in that fucking herpes infested skank house! Great, I've slept with him!

My fists drawl and I slam them into the dashboard. I began freaking out. I light a cigarette, hoping it would help me calm down. I take a few puffs before I realized I couldn't breathe. I was having a panic attack. My heart felt like it was pumping out of my chest, I was shaking and my vision got a little blurry. My mind began to race, constantly repeating and my skin felt as if it were crawling.

"Grae." I faintly hear.

"Grae, unlock the door!"

I open my eyes enough to see Matt through the window.

"No!" I shout.

Matt pulls the door handle again, "C'mon Grae! Open up."

"Why?!" I begin to sob.

"Talk to me, damnit!"

"I don't want to fuckin' talk to you!" I yell.

Suddenly Matt opens the driver's side door and jumps in.

"Please come here." he pulls me into him.

"Leave me the hell alone!" I push away.

Matt just stares at me as I continue to have a breakdown.

"Take me home." I mumble.

"Listen to me, Georgia Girl," Matt tries to talk.

"I want to go home! Don't fuckin' Georgia Girl me! What the fuck am I supposed to thank you for? Other than a fuckin' panic attack and terrible visions in my head! Is that what the fuck you meant when you said it's different partying with rockstars?! If that's so, I don't want a fuckin' part in it!" I shout louder and flip the cigarette out the door.

Matt drops his head and starts the truck.

"I'm sorry." he softly speaks before putting it in reverse and backing out.

I just look out of the window, tears still rolling down my face. The images of the people shooting up, the ones who were openly screwing each other, all the madness, was indeed haunting my head. Although, what pissed me off most was Matt. He had disappeared for at least an hour and after being well introduced to that damned cabin, I can't help but to place him in the middle of all of it. And also he knew there was something in there that I would've thanked him for. The pieces of this fucked up puzzle just keep fitting in the blank spaces that I don't want them to. I close my eyes for the rest of the ride, as it is silent; no words exchange between Matt and I.

Finally, I'm home, where I feel most comfortable. I grab my purse and let myself out of the huge Dodge, before Matt could shut it off. Quickly, I shuffle inside before Matt could say much, if he was even going to.

I stumble to my room and throw myself onto the bed. I raise my head up and notice Matt leaning in the doorway with a worried look on his face. I know I look like hell, especially since I just had a fucking nervous breakdown. He came to sit beside of me.

"Don't touch me." I scan his face for emotion.

"That's fine. I just need to know what the fuck is going on. Tell me."

"Why did you take me there? Is that where you snuck off to? Off to some weird sex cabin in the woods? What the fuck was in there that you thought I'd admire so much that I'd actually thank you for?" I shout.

"You think I saw that shit coming?! What the fuck makes you think I'd sneak off to be with those bitches? I'm not interested in any of those whores! God damn, I just wanted you to meet a couple friends." Matt raises his voice.

"Then what the fuck were you doin' in there?! Where in the hell did you go?"

"I didn't even fucking go in there! I met Jimmy, Tuck, and Johnny on the back deck. They said they were going out to the shack, after I talked to them for awhile. I assumed no one was out there yet," Matt explains, "Why the fuck were you all over Zacky, if you wanna talk about our whole fuckin' night!"

"We were dancin'. You were no where to be found! I don't really wanna fuckin' hear it, you asked me to dance the first day I met you," I yell some more, "I wanna know what the fuck I would've thanked you for, since you supposedly wasn't in there?!"

"They brought a huge 4 foot water bong! And like, a fucking QP of some Haze, they had Exstacy, Xanax, if you're into that kind of shit," Matt continues, "I fucking swear, Grae, I don't want any of those dopewhores. I wasn't even around them! My eyes have been on you the whole fuckin' night. As far as the shack goes, I'm so sorry you had to see that, I wasn't prepared for it, myself. Like I said, I thought no one was in there yet, except for the guys. I know you probably fuckin' hate me, don't believe me, have your own thoughts or what the fuck ever. But either way, I would've never took you in there if I knew it was like that. I wouldn't have went in there. Like I said, I don't have interest for those whores. I have you."

I listened to his every word and even gave him the honor of seeing my face, even while my makeup was smeared and running with my tears. He did sound truthful.

"I believe you," I remove myself from my bed and go into the bathroom.

Matt follows.

"I owe you an apology, Matt," I look at his reflection behind mine, as I wash the makeup from my face. I turn to face him, for the first time, without a speck of minerals.

"No you don't. Just c'mere." Matt wraps me in a huge hug, burying his face in my neck.

I feel so guilty for the way I've treated him tonight. I know that I did, indeed need to apologise for my harsh words.

My arms tighten around Matt's shoulders, pulling him closer to me. I kiss his cheek, "I'm sorry for how I've done you tonight. You didn't deserve my cussin' fit."

"I told you, no apologies needed. But I'm sorry for getting a little upset, as well. And of course, for the way our night ended. And probably for getting a little too drunk." Matt responds with a smile playing on his lips.

I snuggle into his chest and close my eyes; feeling grateful things aren't as I had thought.

He holds me close and kisses my forehead lightly.

"Babe," he looks down at me.

I meet his eyes with my brown ones. "Yes?", I ask with a grin.

"I love you."

Notes