Dont Pray For Me

HOLLY POV

This whole thing was a complete mess. I was huddled up in Nixs bed with her as she cried and cried. Its been maybe 2 minutes since I convinced Zacky to leave me and her alone so he can focus on finding the kids. Ever since the last attack the group decided that I had to sit out so I didnt put baby Sully in danger.

"You dont need to sit here with me Holly" Nix spoke in a cracked voice. Little did she know that actually I in fact do have to, because she is my best friend and sister. "Get over it because im not going anywhere Phoenix" I urged.

My heart ached, not only for her but for her babies who are probably scared out of their minds!

Right now we need everyone to be strong, we needed Nix to be in fighting mode, for everyones sake. "Look Phoenix, I dont want you to take this the wrong way but what good are you doing right now? Laying here curled up in a ball crying isnt going to help us find the twins."

She looked at me with those different colored eyes and stopped crying. "Its my fault they are gone" she whispered. I shook my head and stood up from the bed. This isnt something I wanted to do but at the moment we are pretty desperate. "What are you doing?" she questioned.

I will admit, every now and again the guys like to indulge in illegal substances, so I kept a lock box hidden away in the closet. I trudged to my closet and then came back in Phoenixs bedroom handing it to her. "Here, right now we need you to not have any emotions, we need you to not feel anything, take whatever and become that demon that is merciless."

I watched as she sorted through the box, laughing and rolling her eyes at the contents. At least she wasnt crying anymore right? "No not that" I tried to stop her from taking the cocaine based pill but it was too late, she took multiple ones along with painkillers and xanax. This better turn her back into a psychopath or else Jimmy needs to find a new dealer.

NIX POV

HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT!

THIS SHIT IS FUCKING GREAT!

This is the highest I have ever fucking been in my whole fucking life. 10 minutes! 10 fucking short ass minutes and I was flying as high as a fucking kite. "Fuck yes!! Lets go kill us some skanks!" I screamed shooting out of the bed like a bat outta hell.

I ran down the hallways feeling as light as a feather drifting through the air. Faces blurred and sounds were distorted as I grabbed a rope and stalked my way into the cellar. Michelle was there, head held high, next to Brian, Gretchen and Zacky.

"Fuck outta my way bitches!" I laughed as I flew behind Michelle and wrapped the rope around her neck. Everyone flooded the room around me. "What the fuck is happening right now?" Lyric asked hiding behind Johnny.

"Well Little Mrs Gnome, BigBump over there gave me some drugs to help me be a little bit more help, now someone please give me a fucking cigarette!" I demanded. Eyes turned to Holly as Zacky lit me a cigarette. "Thanks SweetFace" I giggled, wrapping the ends of the rope in my hands.

"You did what!?" Rae scolded Holly. I pulled on the rope slightly, listening to the pained choking whore in front of me. "Leave her alone Raevyn." I turned my attention back to Michelle and let go of the rope when her face turned a bright shade of red.

"Where the fuck are my children Michelle?" I asked taking a drag of the cigarette dangling from my lips.

"Fuck you" she coughed. Tisk tisk tisk, wrong answer...

I took the cigarette from my mouth and pressed the cherry against her cheek, burning the flesh until it was extinguished. "You better fucking tell me or else I will just keep torturing you" I threatened.

"Phoenix" Rae pulled on my arm, but I yanked away from her. "Why are all of you just standing around? Shouldnt you be hacking shit or finding Larry and the other Whores?" I seethed. I watched as everyone broke up into groups and dispersed from my sight. Zack stood leaning against the wall and watched as I continued to torture Michelle for information.

After what seemed like hours of pain and agony mixed with laughter, excitement, and contentment we got the call that changed everything. "Are you sure?" Zacky asked whoever was on the other line. "Yea, ok, see you soon," he stated before hanging up and walking closer to me. I could feel his hot breath scattering all over the back of my neck as he wrapped his arms around me. The drugs put me in a sort of sheer trance, and I couldnt help but bite back the moan begging to erupt from my throat.

"That was Johnny, he tracked down the girls, they are only an hour ahead of us."

Music to my ears!

"Well then lets go!" I shrieked throwing myself into his arms. He laughed and set me down on my feet. "Matt, Rae, Brian and Gretchen are already on it."

"The rest of us will meet up with them after we deal with this" he pointed to the worn out woman in front of us. I reached in my pocket and took out a couple of pills, handing them to my better half. "Take it, trust me, it is soooo much funner to torture someone when youre high as fuck" I stated.

He turned and got a water bottle as I pulled one of the tool boxes over to us along with some chairs and a makeshift hospital bed and light. I waited for Zack to feel that euphoric feeling and then wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing him with all that I had in me. "Oh fuck" he groaned against my lips.

"Thats fucking nasty" Michelle commented.

"Im already starting to come down, so you can do whatever you like baby, i'll be right here watching" I smiled with that devious lopsided smirk of mine. I watched as Zacky forcefully got Michelle onto the gurney and then stopped him.

During the time that it took him to get her up on the table i already took more pills and waited for them to kick in. I craved that feeling right now. The numbness. The void. All of it.

"Wait! I have the best fucking idea in the world!! Youre going to fucking love this Vengeance!" I took off in a sprint and came back in with a camcorder and tripod, I wanted to capture this moment and send them to everyone in the group so they didnt feel left out of all the fun.

"Can I start my Queen?" His rugged voice made me weak in the knees. God I cant believe how much this man gets to me.

"Yes, you may proceed" I laughed pressing record on the camera. He handed me a box cutter and then got one for himself. "It wouldnt be fun without your help baby, do what I do" he made superficial slits all over her skin and I followed in his footsteps. Soon we had her blood curdling screams fill our ears. "I guess lemon juice really burns" I snickered.

He poured a solution onto her skin that burned while being flammable. "Cigarette love?" He asked holding out his pack of Marlboros. I thanked him and lit one, enjoying the nicotine in my lungs. "Champagne, cocaine, gasoline" he stated while lowering his lighter to her skin, causing her whole body to go up in flames.

"Let her die like this?" he motioned to her with his hand.

"No" I replied. He extinguished the flame and sat back as the screams turned into pained crying again. "How do you want her to go Beautiful?" he asked walking up behind me and gliding his hands over my bare arms, leaving goosebumps in their path. Fuck I want him so badly, lets get this shit over with.

"Grab the whore and the ropes, follow me" I took the tripod and we made our way to the backyard. "We are killing her now if you wanna watch!!" Zack screamed to the others in the house. Jimmy, Holly, Johnny and Lyric came out all geared up so we could leave and get on the road once Michelle is dead.

"So we're going to film it?" Holly asked helping set up the tripod again. I nodded and pressed record once again on the camera. "You guys did a fucking number on her" Johnny stated glancing at the charred barely alive woman on the ground. "Hell fucking yea we did!" Zack screeched at the top of his lungs.

All eyes turned to Holly and she held her hands up in defense, "Nope, I didnt give him shit, I swear!" she turned her gaze over to me and lifted her eyebrows. "How much did you give him?"
I shrugged and turned back to the guys, "Ok so let me explain how I want her to go really quick."

"I want it slow and painful. Fasten a knot at the back of her neck and do a short drop, this is called SLOW HANGING, I want her to die not from asphyxiation, but rather from the rope pinching the Vagal nerve in her neck. This results in Vagal reflex, which stops the heart." My inner doctor came out and decided to play with the group.

I watched as they set her up and then forced her to stand on a little platform, "Do you have anything to say before your demise?" Jimmy asked as he stood in front of her, playing the role of the executioner. She turned towards us and spit at our feet with a smile.

"Fucking do it already!" we urged. Jimmy kicked the box out from under her and her body began to jolt and gasp for air. Usually with normal hangings your body will try to reach for the rope to get it off, but in this case the nerve is pinched, and she lost all motor functions, resulting in her suffering for a longer period of time.

We watched as her body started to sway slower and slower until it finally stopped all together.

Notes

So last night at the candle light vigil i started thinking about everyone that has passed away within the last couple years and realized my brother Matt went missing last year on Jan 19th and was found ran over by a truck. He lived, he had a collapsed lung, a broken leg, and had to have surgery on his head/brain. ONE YEAR LATER on the exact day my other brother Mark died... I still cant get over it even though its been a couple days. All I can do is listen to the song "Im Sorry" by Joyner Lucas on repeat.

fuck, im lost.....