Grow Up!

The smell of pizza hung in the air even in the late evening as all of the guys, except for Brian, sat gathered in the living room, drunk their third beer and randomly zapped through all TV channels. No one really understood their wives decision to spend a weekend at the spa hotel but actually they had given up on wasting their time in debating.
Since their wives had left the house they hadn’t done anything productive unless keeping always an eye on the kids. Zacky’s child might be still the smallest but that never meant he had no idea how to keep everyone moving. Whenever one of them focused on something else he used the time to crawl a few inches or hiding himself behind the pillows or under the table. It wasn’t easy but no one had actually expected this. Two of them even started to doubt it was nearly impossible to raise a child alone besides doing the chores. How could their wives manage that but they almost had given up after their first day of trial?!
After all, all of their kids felt asleep but instead of being in bed they were all placed on the second couch and cuddled up to each other to keep themselves warm.

“There must be some trick” Matt said absorbed in thoughts.

“What trick?” Brooks turned his head to the left.

“How does Val manage all of that and keep the house clean? Whether she uses some magic trick or she pays a housemaid I don’t know of.”

“You’ve forgotten that they can do many things at the same time” Zacky mumbled whose eyes were half-closed already.

“I don’t know” Matt wasn’t too convinced by this statement.

“I envy Brian” Johnny sighed.

“Why do you envy Brian? I don’t get this” Zacky narrowed his eyes at Johnny

“Well he’s home along with his wife while we are all babysitting for 5 kids and 2 dogs” he sipped on his beer and put it back on the glass table.

“I don’t ….” Matt turned around as he heard a knocking on the door. “Did you hear that or am I going to be insane?”

They all nodded and kept their eyes focused on the door and listened if the knocking would go on or not. The knocking went on, but now louder and they clearly heard someone screaming behind it.

“Daddy?” River woke up from the noises and rubbed his eyes.

“All good!” he smiled and cursed the person behind the door.

It took already almost an hour to convince Sanders Junior it was bedtime and another hour to wait until he felt asleep exhausted next to his brother Cash.

“You!” he growled.

“Brian we just talked about you” Johnny chuckled but more about the point that his friend knocked on the door when he mentioned his name in the conversation. Timing was everything.

“What do you want? Don’t you have a wife to please?” Zacky statement had a slightly bitchy underline and this wasn’t just pure coincidence.

“Long story guys, but can I come in?” Brian stood at the doorstep, drenched with rain and with a dark-blue bag in his right hand.

“Ok” Matt gave in and stepped aside. “But you tell my son a good night story. It’s your fault he woke up again.”

“No problem” he shrugged, pretending he has done that over hundred times already.

“Good luck” Matt mumbled, sat back down on the couch and sipping on his fourth beer.

“Come little boy” Brian picked River up and looked at the other guys. “What about the other 4? Do you really want to keep them all here on the couch? I beg your pardon” he rolled with his eyes and went upstairs.

Johnny waited until he heard the door and turned to the other guys.

“Did he just try to tell us how to raise a child?” Johnny tried to understand what just happened.

“Yes” Matt snarled between his teeth, put down his bottle and went upstairs.

He really had to check if Brian was able to do his job in a shorter time. Matt couldn’t agree to his inner demon that others might be better at raising a child as himself. He couldn’t agree to himself that Brian might be a better father as he was. At least he was the one who had two children already while his friend choose a lifestyle where he rather went on parties or to spend time along with his wife. Brian loved kids, he hadn’t doubt that, but he always had seen his face after he picked up his two sons from a weekend trip or an afternoon with uncle and auntie.
Slowly he sneaked to the door and lurked in carefully, trying to get a glimpse of the scene.

“Shall I tell you a good-night story instead? I think your parents had read all of these books a hundred times right?” he sat down on the floor.

The little boy just nodded, looked down to his uncle and strained his ears to listen his story.

“Well there was once a very famous band, let me say they are still pretty famous at this time. And a guy, you might know him” he winked obvious “had met a very pretty girl at the backstage area.”

River giggled as he saw his daddy coming into the room and gazed at Brian on the floor.

“Are you sure you really want to tell him such story?” Matt tried to remember his friend that his boy turned 3 a few months ago.

His friend only shrugged and was unware of any wrongdoing. He just started a story and Matt interrupted him for nothing.

“Can I talk to you outside?” he pointed to the door.

“Sure” Brian rolled annoyed with his eyeballs, getting up from the floor and smiled at River before he left the room.

“What’s wrong this time?” he put his hands on his waist, sighed out loud and made clear that he wasn’t amused at all.

“You just realize what kind of story you almost told to my son?”

“Wait” he shook his head, bite his lip to restrain a laughter “You think I would tell your boy naughty stories?”

Johnny, who just passed them on the first floor, got stopped by Matt.

“Can you tell my boy a story? I need to talk with Mr. Haner downstairs.”

The little one just nodded and looked at Brian’s face who turned from happy-face to a stony-faced mien. Johnny knew that tonight would end up in a big battle since he rarely had seen Brian as angry as he seemed to be right now. Both were dickheads which implied that no one would give up so easily. They would fight for their right, even if this would take the whole night.

“What’s wrong?” Brooks wondered why both were coming back down already.

Whether Matt nor Brian responded to that question. Both remained still silent and caught in their own frame of mind. After a few seconds it was Brian who started the conversation with a calming voice. No one liked to argue as two teenagers would do right now, screaming at each other for so long until one gave up or the agreed blindly just to end this dispute.

“I already had told you upstairs. I’m not happy about your choice of story you wanted to tell my son” Matt calmed down as well, leaned himself against the dishwasher to find some hold.

It was late already and he could need a snatch of sleep.

“What do you think what I’ve told him? I actually wanted to tell him a story how his uncle and auntie had met. Do you think I would tell your son a story filled with naughty details?”

He nodded. Yes he feared that Brian would have told his son a story like that, no harm on any sneaky details his 3-year old son would hear.

“Matt, I might come across as some dirty boy who would take every opportunity but I try to settle down for long years already. Yes I keep flirting with girls but more because it’s good for my ego. I made a promise on May 7th as you remember, and I won’t break it. And if you want to know Michelle plans to start a family and I became a chicken and decided to run away. I don’t want to argue you right now, actually I wanted to prove to you I can be a good father as everyone here. We all raised Johnny, right?” he giggled and remembered old times when they used to tease the ‘gnome’ more often.

“Sorry. I never should have doubt it.”

“What did I just hear? Haner boy will be father soon” Johnny stirred up the whole situation a little bit.

“You were my first project and you see that I succeeded perfectly. Now it’s time to get real” Brian retorted.

“If he gets Chelle’s genes he or she will be happy” he took his water bottle and ran away to free himself of Brian’s next comment.

He took it all in a harmless way. Both teased each other since the first time they had met but became good friends over the years. Since Matt was now father their bound just got closer by hanging out more together or had lunch at a local restaurant. They were always those two who hadn’t start a family yet but now after Michelle’s decision Johnny remained as the only from the group. For a moment he felt sorry and a feeling started to come up that tried to tell him he would leave his friend on purpose. He knew it was a lie but still he hadn’t made any decision if he would agree on her future plans or if they had to discuss this all over again.

“Good night” he backslapped Matt before he also went upstairs to one of the guest rooms in Matt’s house.

Matt turned off the light in the kitchen and was about to go to the living room as he saw Brooks still sitting on the couch, typing something on his phone.

“Shouldn’t you be in bed by now as the rest did already?” he yawned and let himself fall on the couch.

His eyes got heavier every second and he had to put a lot of control to keep them open. Right now he just wanted to lay down on the couch and sleep for about 6 hours until River or Cash get up again.

“I get hunt by insomnia for days already and there’s still much work to do but is all good with you and Brian?” Brooks turned the conversation to another direction. He wasn’t into talking about his problems and rather solve them on his own.

“Yes. I just thought he might would tell my son one of his dirty stories” he shook his head and heard how ridiculous his thought sounds.

“I doubt so. And even then they wouldn’t have recognized it anyway. I think you remember the design of one of our Tenacious D concerts, the ones with the penis with its wings. My sons saw that and still call it the big birdie” he smirked.

“Brian leaves no details out. I’ve heard him talking about his sex with Michelle and it even sounds weirder when you date her twin sister. I even started to compare it and do you know what?” he looked at Brooks for long until he went on “It’s true what you say about twins. Even they’re fraternal twins they’re pretty much alike. I even started to have …”

“Don’t go on, please” Brooks creased his face into a confused look.

He already heard too much for his taste. Not sure if Matt freely talked about it or if the tiredness was speaking right now.

“Go to bed. I’ll sleep here” he patted his friend’s shoulder friendly.

~*~

By the first sunlight sneaking between the curtains into his bedroom he woke up yawning. Still fighting against the idea to open his eyes and rather enjoy a few more minutes in his cozy bed as getting up and face the new with new challenges ahead. For one second he hoped he just dreamed that his wife choose to go to a spa over the weekend but the peacefully silence in the house revealed it was real. Actually it was too quiet in the house.
Frightened by that fact he got up as fast as he even could. There were 5 children in the house, along with 2 dogs, and still it seemed like he was the only one. It was a bit like from the film ‘Home Alone’ when Kevin believed his dream come true overnight.

“Hello?” he opened the door, looked to the right and left but no one was to be seen or heard.

Dead Silence. This started to fright him for real. Before checking the other rooms on the first floor he went downstairs. Matt had no idea why he did that but he remembered that Brooks decided to sleep on the couch and if he was still there it was a sign he wasn’t out of his mind. This all had happened yesterday and he wasn’t caught on repeat mode. Something that happened to Bill Murray as Phil Connors in the film ‘Groundhog Day’. Matt slowly had to stop comparing his life moments to any random movie he had seen in his past. It started to sound ridiculous already.
Though when he saw that Brooks wasn’t on the couch and all his notes on the glass table had vanished he started to doubt his own memory.

“Hello?” he shouted. “Anyone here?”

He heard a door rumbling and Brian standing at the bannister.

“Can you please shut up? There are people trying to get their sleep. It’s fucking 6am!! Get a grip, man” he called back before he shut the door again.

Right. Matt hasn’t checked the time when he left the bedroom and that answered why no one got up yet. His kids usually sleep until 7am but then where was Brooks? None of his guest rooms were free anymore unless he liked to share a bed with Zacky, while Johnny and Brian shared a room together.
There was no sign he had been sleeping on the couch. All was tidied up and everything was on its right place.

Notes