I've Lost the Power to Feel

I walk into my cute little kitchen, taking in the sounds and sights around me. Rays of golden sunlight filter through the blinds onto the little white counter. Birds sing happily amidst the maples in the backyard. A little commercial jet roars overhead, probably heading to the airport. Dogs bark. Children play on the swing set next door, laughter and smiles flow between them as they run around. A warm breeze pushes itself through the open window. This, this was the place I love with my whole heart. It is perfect. My home is a small one, but rather cute. It sits on a nice lot in Eden Prairie, Minnesota. I was surprised I could afford it originally, since my roommate and I don't make a lot, but there was an older woman who was looking for some nice people to take care of her little townhouse and remembered my mom, who had been a senior living exec years ago.

The neighbors here are nice enough, but sometimes complain about us not shoveling our driveway and our music because of their young children. At least they're cute; the kids, I mean. My boyfriend, Ashton Kelly, lives 20 minutes away from me. I work five nights a week as a bartender at a club called The Afterlife. I finally own the car of my dreams thanks to my dad--a dark red '98 Dodge Viper: fast, uncomplicated, and gorgeous. I have an amazing boyfriend, a supporting family, and a just-about-perfect life. I couldn't really ask for more.

I walk back to my room down the hall, scuffling my feet on the ancient ivory carpet. I rummage through my dresser to find a pair of clean breeches. I finally settle on dirty beige breeches and a well-loved Star Wars shirt. I trot to the mudroom after changing and put on my riding boots, as well as grabbing my keys and purse at the last moment. I open the garage door and start the car, absentmindedly noticing the lit-up gas light. I head towards Aston's house, patchily singing along to some obscure band on the radio.


Ashton lives in an apartment with a buddy of his who is never there except on the weekends, so he likes to pretend it's his place. I punch in the code, park, and head to the second floor of the complex. The entire place smells like Indian food all the time; I have no clue how he stands it. Boys.


I knock on his door a few times. No one answers. I put my ear to the wood and hear Avenged Sevenfold's Critical Acclaim echoing through the apartment. [i]How does the landlord not kick him out for this...[/i] I sigh and pulled my lock-picking kit, something I never left the house without, out of my purse. My uncle is a military guy and got me that and some pepper spray that'd take down a bear for Christmas one year. I proceed to manipulate the metal pieces in the lock until I hear the telltale click. This isn't my first time picking Aston's lock, the dork never leaves his door unlocked; even when having a party. Not the sharpest crayon. I open the door and head into the living room like I own the place and I see my cute Irish boyfriend sitting on the couch, sharpening his knives and singing, badly. I hit the Pause button on the stereo and he jumps, earning laughter from me.

"You scared me, Monkey." He crosses his arms and pouts his cute lips.

I giggle. "You wouldn't answer the door, so I decided I'd let myself in."

"Rude."

"Nerd."

He gets up with a smile and hugs me. "I missed you."

I stand on my tiptoes and give the tall, handsome man a kiss. Ashton has been out of state for almost a week. "How was Florida?"

"Hot. Sticky. Lots of bad drivers."

"Not exactly what I was asking for, you goofball. How did your meeting with that music guy go?"

"Oh," he replies. "It was great. Andrew wanted to use Fugue in A Minor and the Mental Suite at some big-shot convention in May, and he also wants me to do a CD." I cheer. Ever since Ashton entered high school, he wrote tons of music, and at age 18 he started selling it. His dream is to have his music known around the globe, and it's finally coming true.

"I am so so happy for you!" I ruffle his brilliant red hair.

He smiles down at me. "You know what? I'm pretty fucking happy too."

"I love you, Ash."

"And I love you too, little Miss Jordan." He kisses me roughly. His green eyes twinkle as he looks at me adorably. I can't help but stroke his cute little freckles and his defined jaw. He pulls me closer, wanting, but I slip out of his arms and nearly losing my shirt in the process.

I adjust my shirt while Ashton waggles his eyebrows at the glimpse of my bra. Typical male. "I gotta go, baby. Mister Sootar's calling my name."

Ashton rests his head on my shoulder like a puppy and mock sighs.

"I swear to God, that horse gets more attention than I do."

I fluff his hair. "You're just needy. Love you."

"Love you too, hun." He slaps my butt as I walk out the door. I begin to scold him but he shuts the door, laughing. I make my way to my car and hop in, get out of the parking lot, and head east.

Notes

Hey hey hey friends, notice anything different? Eh? No, I didn't lose weight. Nope, not high. No, I haven't gotten a haircut in months, I know I need to. You know what? Never mind, I'll tell you. I'm redoing this story!!! Surprise! Yay! Every chapter will be plucked, waxed, and polished to a semblance of perfection. This is the first sample, Chapter Uno. Hope you enjoyed, and I'll see you around!

Madi