Brian´s POV
It seemed like the ceiling was coming down on me, slowly, inch by inch. It was a process that had been going on all night, and that was exactly why I knew it wasn’t really… Coming down I mean. So me feeling like this must mean I was slowly going crazy… right?

I had hardly slept and all I could think about was Amy. I was going through a rollercoaster of feelings and I still hadn’t decided on which was the right one.

Anger had consumed me when Zack bend Amy over to kiss her. His eyes were locked on mine the whole time and that pissed me off even more. If he wanted kiss her so badly, he should have his full attention on her… She deserved to have undivided attention. But deep down I knew what he was trying to do, he wasn’t really out to kiss her, he wanted me to admit what I was feeling… according to him. And it almost worked… at least partly. He definitely got a rise out of me and I didn’t know how fast I had to take Amy out of his arms, back into mine… where she belonged.

Even though our drive home had been quiet, I was happy to have her next to me. It was apparent to me that once we got home, and in my bed, it would all be okay. No doubts between us anymore, no questions about feelings, just her an me. Once we would be connected in the most natural way, it would all be okay.

But it wasn’t.

I closed my eyes and turned to my side. It hurt to think of the look she had on her face when she had looked at me expectantly, hoping for me to tell her about what was bothering me. And then that look when she closed that door on me. That was the second biggest reason I hadn’t been sleeping all night. The first I didn’t even want to admit to.

Had Zack been right? Was I lying to everyone? Including myself and Amy? Shit, I don’t know… I never felt like this before, how could I know what “this” was? I thought I was in love with Michelle, I thought I loved her, but that was nothing like the way I was feeling right now. How could this be anything more than I was telling everyone it was? How could this be more than just sitting all of this out until it was officially over? I groaned… Damn.. I was never much for soulsearching, things were as they came, but this thing fucked me up.

Zack called me a possessive bastard and that adjective could definitely be a description of some of my feelings. I didn’t want anybody touching her, hell I didn’t even want anybody looking at her. It kinda felt like how I felt about my guitars. I didn’t want anyone touching them, afraid they might break them. But I loved my guitars… Did I love Amy too?

Was I comparing my feelings for a woman to my feelings towards my guitars now? I really was going crazy.

I turned to my back again and listened for sounds. There weren’t any from the room across the hall, would Amy still be sleeping? Maybe I could sneak into her bed and hold her for a bit, maybe even get a little sleep at last. I got out of the bed and snuck into the hallway. I really didn’t want to wake her, I wanted her to get her sleep, but most of all I didn’t want her to reject me again.

The moment I opened the door I knew this was where I belonged. With her. Maybe I was falling for her, maybe it was time for me to admit to it, maybe Zack was right. Maybe this was the real deal. But I didn’t want to rush this, I needed to sleep on it for a bit, I couldn’t make a decision like that on no sleep at all. Amy was sleeping so peacefully, it made me want to bathe in her serenity. I lifted the sheet she had pulled over herself and slipped right in behind her, putting my arm around her. She stirred a little in her sleep, but then fully melted into me with a deep sigh.

All the turmoil inside of me quiet down and I could already feel my eyes fall shut. It probably was too late to admit to this, but this was the most important reason I hadn’t been able to sleep… I didn’t know how to anymore, without her in my arms.

“Oh Amy, I missed you so much”

A loud banging woke me up and my instincts told me to get Amy to safety, but she wasn’t were she belonged anymore. I opened my eyes and saw her standing next to the bed, quickly slipping into clothes and already heading for the door.

“Amy! Stop! You can’t just go down there, who knows who it is!” I was out of bed before she could even protest and I stood in front of her.
“Brian, step aside!” she looked tired and stared at me as if she had resigned in the situation we were now. I couldn’t let her think that, we were far from over!

Another loud pounding on my door got Amy and me out of our staring contest and I opened the door before Amy could. I was going to protect her, whether or not she liked it. When I heard the person yelling my name, commanding me to open up, I knew Amy wouldn’t need any protection.

“Where the fuck were you?” Matt pushed past me as soon as I opened the door. Sara followed him immediately, but didn’t even grant me a look, she grabbed Amy’s hand an pulled her behind her, up the stairs.

I turned around to stare after the women. Again I had no time or chance to do the most important thing, talk to Amy. Why did it seem like the whole universe was against us? How could I make things right with her if I wasn’t even able to talk to her. I sighed and let my shoulders hang down.

“We will need to talk about that, but first I need to show you something” Matt’s hand landed on my shoulder in a comforting manner and he gently pushed me towards my living room.
“How are you?” he asked me as we sat down opposite of each other. When he looked at me, I knew he would be able to see what really was going on, we had been friends forever and we knew each other. I could tell he was way more invested in Sara than he really should, just like he was able to see that I was freaking out.
“That bad huh?”
I just raised my brow at him, which made him continue with a sigh.
“Well, I’m sorry to add more to the misery, but you should see this” Matt threw a paper towards me. It was folded at the gossip pages and a page wide picture spread of Amy and me was rubbing me in my face.

“You got to be kidding me” I let out as I struggled my way through the article, it was bad. I pushed myself out of my chair. I needed to talk to Amy! She needed to know she shouldn’t take any offense of this, it was not her fault, it would all be okay. I was already halfway to the stairs when Matt stopped me.
“Brian, don’t. Sara is with her, they will get down, give her space”
“But I-”

“Wanna tell me what is going on?” Matt pushed me back into my chair and stood across from it, his arms folded over his chest.
“The fuck if I know” I groaned, quickly deciding that I finally needed some advice. I couldn’t continue like this “She shut me out yesterday. She told me that I was too grumpy and that she didn’t want me to ruin her good mood. I barely slept.” I let my head fall down in my hands with a sigh “I don’t know what to do anymore Matt, this is not how it was supposed to go”
Matt pulled his hand through his hair and smiled “I know all about that, but sometimes it’s a good thing, Haner”

I thought about that, was it? A good thing? I was too fucking confused “I have no idea if this is a good or a bad thing, there are these… I don’t know… feelings…” Matt was staring at me now, his mouth opened up wider and wider. Yes, I was going to say something that would amaze him, I was pretty sure of that.

“I did some thinking and I think I might be in-“
“What the fuck is going on that I’m not allowed to sleep in anymore?!” Johnny stormed in, Zack and Arin hot on his heels. Yeah… That was something I would like to know… What the fuck is going on?!

Sara’s POV
“Don’t look at me like that. We are on our way to help our friends, but if you keep looking at me like that, I’m going to turn around and our plan will be out of the door” Matt smiled and put his hand on my leg, while he faced the road again, back to concentrating on the driving. We were on our way to Brian’s house, I really needed to talk to Amy before she saw the paper, she would freak out. I needed to be there for her, but the cute concentrated look on Matt’s face made me falter in my resolutions.

He made it even worse the second he pulled up on Brian’s driveway, lifting me out of the car, kissing me like he had been without for weeks. I giggled when he let me slide down his body.
“Matt, come on, we need to make sure they don’t see the paper without us” I slipped my hand into his as we walked over to the house. Matt knocked, and knocked again when there was no reaction. It took a pretty big pounding on the door before a sleepy looking Brian finally opened the door.

“Where the fuck were you?” Matt let out annoyed as he pushed past Brian, who made a mocking “come in” gesture. Amy stood a little more down the hall, her face dumbfounded. I tried to catch her gaze and when I finally I saw her eyes wash with relief and I knew I did the right thing pressing to come here. I pushed Brian out of my way and grabbed Amy’s hand pulling her upstairs. When we reached the room Amy had been first assigned to, I was a little taken back by the fact that the bed seemed recently slept in. Wasn’t Amy sleeping with Brian? Or were they sleeping here?

“What is going on?” Amy finally seemed to have found her tongue again and she sat down on the bed, looking at me with question in her eyes.
“Later, first you want to tell me what is going on with you?”
“Sara… Don’t start”

I sat down on the bed and turned to her “No, you don’t start. I let you off the hook for way too long now, we’ve been brutally honest to each other from the day we’ve met and we have been friends for a long time, now tell me what is going on”
Amy avoided my eyes and looked at her hands, silence filled the room. Oh no, she wasn’t going to pull this on me again “Amy… Get on with it!”

“I don’t know, okay?!” she snapped at me “I wouldn’t even know what to say or where to start. If you want something from me, the only thing I can give you that I am confused beyond believe. I don’t even know if I’m living forward or backwards, I don’t fucking know Sara!” Amy looked like she was about to cry any minute and my heart clenched in my chest. I hated to see her like this, this wasn’t fair, this wasn’t at all what she deserved. I put my arm around her and she put her hand on my shoulder, resting it for a bit “I don’t know what to believe or what to do anymore, I don’t even know what I feel” Her voice was barely audible.

“Start with this bed. Don’t you sleep with Brian in his room?”
“I did, until yesterday, but he was acting weird again. He was so grumpy and I had a nice night, I didn’t want him to ruin it, so I told him I would sleep here. This morning when I woke up from Matt’s knocking, Brian was in the bed, holding me. I have no idea how long he had been there.” Her eyes were sad “One moment he is all loving, the other moment he doesn’t even want to acknowledge the fact that we are married, he just acts like he just has to sit out his time. I don’t know which side of him to believe, he is changing his mind so fast it feels like I have to watch a very quick tennis game. Serve, look left. Another serve, look right”

“Oh Amy” I comforted her, pulling her to me a little tighter. I wanted to tell her that I didn’t believe Brian was only waiting for the end, but I knew it wouldn’t do any good at all. I wasn’t sure of Brian’s feelings and I really needed it confirmed first before I could tell Amy anything.
“Do you want to go to a hotel together? I would do it if you want to, if you can’t stay here anymore”
She shook her head “I can’t Sara, you know I can’t, I’m not allowed” she had a moment of silence before she continued “And I’m not even sure if I could stay away from him” a blush came over her face “As much as I would like to say that I kept to myself, that this is all handled like a holiday fling, that I didn’t fall for him…. I did, Sara”

That was no news for me, but what made her admit to that so easily now, but before I could ask, she already continued “But that doesn’t matter, you warned me before. He doesn’t want me like that, to him it’s all a game and it’s time I handle it that way too, whatever the hell I’m feeling for him. From now on, it’s just pretend for the outside world, no him dragging me into more than is needed, no more being a couple outside of the press. No more. I need to shield myself and get this over with.”

Her face looked all brave, but her eyes weren’t adding up. I had no solution for this and it was killing me. What made it even worse was that I had to tell her about the paper now. She needed to hear it from me. As if she knew I had to tell her something she asked me why I came here.

I bend my head when I handed her the paper. Matt and I had stopped over at a gas station on the way over to get another copy. Amy’s face turned whiter with the second and for a moment I was afraid she would fall over. As soon as she read the last sentence she stood up “I need to talk to Brian”
“Hold on for a second, you know this is all crap right? There is no need for you to feel offended by this?”
She looked at me as if I was stupid “I know. Brian told me all about this woman. She staked out of Matt’s house when he got his divorce, when Brian broke up with Michelle, she spend ages making up a story. I know this isn’t real, but Brian did almost kick her ass while he was trying to protect me, so that is no good news. I’m sure that Larry guy can fix all of this without us having to get involved.”

She already had the doorknob in her hand when we heard a lot of noise downstairs. Apparently the others had arrived too.
“You coming?”

As soon as we started descending the stairs, the guys appeared on the bottom. Matt immediately pulled me to his body, while he leaned with his back on the breakfast bar. I watched Amy and Brian, uncomfortable with moving around each other as the other three read the article in the newspaper.
“What did Brian say?” I whispered, while I turned my head up to Matt. He shrugged and shook his head “Not much. I think he was about to say something important when the guys came in. We need to do something about this Sara, they are both unhappy.”
I sighed while I whispered back “I know, the are confusing each other, but I have a strong feeling that shouldn’t be necessary. I think they could make a real couple”
Matt shortly kissed my lips before he pulled a wide grin on his face “I thought you hated Brian”
“I don’t really hate him, only for what he is doing to my friend, but he doesn’t look very happy either”

We both looked at the ‘happy’ married couple, in the middle of all the commotion, looking like they were ready to cry or explode, or both. This was fucking ridiculous. If I only knew Brian’s real feelings.

“This is all pretty messy” Zack said as he looked around the group “I think it’s time to call Larry, he will know what to do”

“Not necessary!” Larry stormed into the living room, putting his briefcase on the table, getting everyone’s attention “I already planned a press conference in 2 hours. You are going there with the five of you, Amy and Brian in the middle. Brian will make a statement on the marriage and Matt will answer most of the questions. I want everyone on their best behavior” He made a pointed look around the room.

“Amy, Brian, come with me, I will need to brief you. Or at least Amy. Dealing with the press isn’t easy”

Amy looked at me with a wide eyes, fear reflecting clearly. So far for not having to get involved.

Notes

Yeah... what will happen now? Amy needs to deal with the press, and she really doesn't want to... And what the hell is Brian doing?