Welcome to the Family

There I was in the middle of a stinky club in downtown Los Angeles, trying my best to hide my jealousy as Matt was dancing with a blond belle. Still, I caught him watching me a couple of times, and whenever I did so, I pretended to have the time of my life dancing with Zacky. There was no way I was going to let him know just how much his behavior hurt me.

Eventually Syn went out to have a smoke and I decided to join him for some fresh air. I could tell he was pretty baked. “Yo Vicca, so what do you think about the club so far?” he mushed. Before I could answer, we were joined by Matt and the tall blonde. She smiled at me reassuringly, but I couldn’t help it, I didn’t like her. Maybe because she had something I wanted.

“So, Amy, this is Vicca. Vicca, this is Amy, my sister,” Matt said. My jaw dropped. Sister? So she wasn’t his new girlfriend or something? Amy shook my hand and told me it was nice to meet me, but I was still too surprised to answer. After a few seconds I just replied, “Ditto.” Matt immediately started to talk to Syn, leaving me and his sister on our own.

“So, you’re the one, huh?” Amy chuckled. The one? The hell was she talking about? “The one?” I asked. “You know, the one who finally made Matt ditch his bitchy wife, that’s who you are,” she replied and I grinned, “Yep, that would be me.” “That’s great! She hated me from the beginning. Just because I accidentally spilled some wine on her pajamas on her wedding day. Can you believe that? On her frickin’ PAJAMAS!” We burst out laughing.

We reentered the club and started dancing again. This time, Amy danced with Zacky and Matt put his strong arms around me. His touch was so soothing, especially after how incredibly agitated I’d felt because of him dancing with his sister. Zack and Brian were pretty drunk, but Matt was only slightly squiffy, if anything at all.

Brian eventually jumped on the stage where the DJ's table was set up and started screaming the lyrics of A Little Piece of Heaven into the tiny microphone, accompanied by incredibly irritating dance moves with which I supposed he wanted to visualize the content of the song.

After the first minute, some security guys fought him down and he showed us all his middle finger and screamed "I am Synyster fucking Gates and I am awesome. And I'd be a better front singer than M lame ass Shadows. Oh and chicks, you should see my dick!" He then was placed in a corner together with Johnny, who'd just barfed into the black cap Matt had worn earlier. But I didn't care, all that counted was that I was dancing with Matt, and that Amy was his sister, not his hook-up.

At four, the DJ played his last song, and after that, Matt pulled me into his arms and gave me a long hug. I pressed my head against his chest and heard his heart beat loudly and fast.
Amy grinned at us, but I just closed my eyes, wanting to switch off the world for that precious moment's sake.

I didn’t care if anyone saw us, and Matt seemed not to, either. We only stopped when we heard Zacky and Brian make loud obscene noises and Johnny playfully slapped Matt’s ass. “Get a rooooom,” Zacky slurred loudly once Matt let go of me. “Shut up Vengeance, will you,” Matt chuckled. Then he put his arm around his drunk friend so he could walk straight.

When we arrived at the house, I helped Matt put Zacky and Brian into their rooms and at least take off their shoes. Johnny, luckily, was able to stumble into his room on his own, slurring "Best night ever, fuckeeers, thank you, Tokio, you were a great audience! See you next time" before falling into bed face first.

When we were done, Matt insisted on walking me to my door, and I gladly let him. “I hoped you liked going to the club with us,” he began. I bluntly replied, “Yes, I did. I mean, after I learned that Amy was your sister, of course.” I bit my tongue, regretting what I’d just said. What happened to all the determination not to let him know? I wondered. He smiled, seeming touched and embarrassed.

“Well, I should have told you. But you could have asked me, too,” he said softly. We were already standing in front of my apartment’s door. “Yeah, I could have, but that would have come across just about as stupid as what I said now,” I answered, feeling like a moron.
“You should sleep now,” he suggested, and I couldn't help but stare at how beautiful the moonlight made his eyes look.

“I know. Good night Matt. I had a really great time tonight,” I smiled. “That’s good to hear, good night to you, too.” And with that, he bent toward me and gently brushed his lips against mine. I felt a million butterflies go berserk in my stomach, just like it was the first time. When I started responding to his kiss, he pulled away hesitatingly. “You know what, freckles, I made this mistake once. I’m not gonna make it again.” I swallowed. What did he mean by ‘this mistake’? Kissing me?

“Okay,” I rasped. He cupped my face with his hands and forced me to look at him. I lost myself in his beautiful hazel eyes with the dark circles around the iris, almost exactly like I had them. The only difference was that my irises were of another color, some mixture of grey, green and a dash of blue, and that I had a freckle right beneath my right pupil.

“Good night,” Matt said once again before kissing my forehead. When he pulled out of our embrace, I felt incredibly cold. I just wished he’d stayed with me. I watched Matt return to the house and unlock the door before I finally went inside mine. I immediately went to bed.


5.52 am, my alarm clock said in bright red numbers. Once again I couldn’t sleep. I spent the rest of the night tossing and turning and sometimes falling asleep for only a couple of minutes. When it was finally 8, I knew I couldn’t stay in bed much longer, so I went for a run and then took a long relaxing bath.

“I’m not gonna make this mistake again,” he’d said. I couldn’t stop wondering what he’d meant. Didn’t he want to kiss me? Didn’t he want me to fall for him? Or did he just mean he didn’t want to go further with me so fast?
But I knew now, I was in deep with Matthew Charles Sanders, M Shadows, or whatever people liked to call him, ready to fall any moment. If there was anything I was absolutely sure about these days, then this was it. I sighed at the thought that it hadn’t even taken me long to give in to my feelings. They were too strong to be outthought.

Still, I didn’t know how to handle my newly acquired knowledge. Sure, I could tell him. But if he didn’t feel the same way, of what use was that? Maybe he’d just laugh at me or even take advantage of it. That was my point, I didn’t know anything about him, yet I was already certain that I could so easily love him.

That’s the crazy thing about love. It never thinks, never searches, never considers options. It just stumbles into your life recklessly, and then it’s just there. All those butterflies in your stomach, all those intense chemical reactions when the chosen touches your skin, all those hours you lie wide awake and try to think of songs that don’t remind you of them.

When I got out of the tub, it was already ten, so I decided to prepare breakfast. No-one was up yet, but considering that we only got home little after half past four that wasn’t really surprising. Brian was the first to stumble into the kitchen, looking like a living corpse. “Mornin’, daaaayum, that was one hell of a night,” he yawned, genuinely in a very good mood.

“Good morning, Brian, coffee?” I offered, and he sat down at the edge of the table and just nodded, his eyes still more closed than open.
After his second cup of coffee, he finally found back to his brisk, cheerful self. We joked and laughed, but eventually he grinned, “Admit it, Matty-Poo scared the hell outta you with Amy yesterday.” I immediately felt my palms beginning to sweat. Helplessly, I stared out of the kitchen window and dug my fingernails hard into the insides of my hands.

“Maybe,” I heard myself say. Had I really just admitted in front of Brian that I eventually liked his best friend Matt? Shocked by this terrifying realization I jumped out of my seat and turned toward the stove to prevent Brian from seeing my tomato red face.

“Relax,” he laughed, pulling me into a friendly hug. “It’s alright,” he mumbled reassuringly as I couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. I don’t even know why I started crying that day, maybe because now I knew that I had at least one ally. One who knew what I felt for Matt, and who would – at least I hoped so – comfort me if it didn’t work out.

I quickly dried my tears and started laughing embarrassedly. “It’s just so…” I began, but Brian interrupted me, “Vicca, like I said, it’s alright. I just really hope he won’t hurt you. I mean, I could really get used to your organic shit waffles.” He grinned broadly before finally letting go of me. “But seriously, if there’s anything you wanna talk about, just tell me. I know I don't seem like I could stay serious for more than a minute, but believe me, I know when I have to be."

When Brian was done, I cleaned up after him just minutes before Johnny and Zack entered the room. Right after them, he came. Matt. The one who caused me a sleepless night and a nervous breakdown in the arms of Synyster Gates. Yep, exactly this Matt. “Good morning,” the three of them murmured before silently eating my food. I caught Matt looking in my direction a couple of times, but never really read anything into what he was doing.

After lunch, the guys headed off to the studio once again. I reminded Matt to be home by six, as my mom had scheduled a meeting to talk about their defense strategy for the upcoming trial. He didn’t seem too thrilled, but promised to be there in time anyway.
I spent the better part of the afternoon on the internet, listening to older Avenged songs, admiring Matt’s flawless face in countless music videos, and cursing at myself for being in so deep.

At about five, I heard the slamming of a car’s door in the driveway. My heart immediately started beating faster at the thought that it could only be Matt. When I heard his keys turn, I immediately picked up my phone in order to seem busy.

Out of the corner of my eye I admired how handsome he looked in his blue jeans and black Ramones shirt. His hair was messy and slightly curly, so I assumed he had worn a beanie outside. If only I’d worn something sexier, I thought, suddenly unhappy with today’s choice of clothes, which consisted of boyfriend jeans and a white shirt with some black flowers on it.

“Oh, hey Matt,” I greeted him casually. “Hi there, Vicca,” he smiled at me. Hello? Brain to heart, please slow down. Brain to mouth, please say something that doesn't make you seem like the dumbest bitch ever.

I didn’t know what to say, so I remained quiet while looking at him for seconds. “How was practice?” I asked lamely. “I got the day off, so it was great,” he grinned before sitting down on the couch and telling me a few funny stories from the studio. We then switched on the TV and started watching some documentary about the IRAQ war, sitting next to each other, but not touching each other at all. Neither of us said a word for a very long time.

Eventually, the doorbell rang and my mother entered the room. Matt and Mom stayed in the living room while I went to the kitchen to prepare some snacks for them. When I returned I found the two of them laughing loudly at some stupid joke. They seemed to get along instantly, which really made me happy.

“So, Mrs. Harper, when’s the trial?” Matt asked, grabbing one of the tiny wraps I’d made. “Matt, we agreed on Edith, didn’t we?” Mom chuckled. Seriously? None of my boyfriends had ever got the privilege of calling my Mom by her first name, and now Matt did? Only after some hours together? Hours in which she was talking about his defense strategy in a trial of domestic violence? Nothing made sense to me anymore.

Notes

Haha, got you guys! I know you were scared by the end of the last chapter. But here we go, things do look kind of good between Matt and Vicky, don't you think?

Comments please! I love you guys, you make my day :)