Look What You've Done

Her red hair was covering her face, I couldn't see her well but it was enough to recognize her. I looked over at my dad who was waiting for a reaction from my part. I had suddendly the need to throw up, I didn't know how long I could keep it in. I turned myself, I couldn't handle seeing her.


"Fucking asshole." I whimpered to him as I took rudly my hat out of his hand. I placed myself onto my knees, I couldn't handle this rage inside of me, I felt my dad's hand onto my shoulder, I instantly pushed it away. "Don't touch me!" I yelled to him. I've always trusted him, he just betrayed me. I stood up again, feeling the rush of adrenaline.


"You really want me dead?! What's this?! A fucking plot to find me dead?!" I yelled at everyone there, Johnny, Matt, Jimmy, Zacky and my dad. All the people who knew how really wrecked I was. I looked over at Hayley who was still staring at the floor, I saw the tears rolling down her cheeks and the silents sobs she was trying to hide.


"Oh well, now she's crying! Do you really think I'll feel bad for you, even a second?! FUCKING DAMN LOOK AT ME!" I yelled to her, that she could see how fucked up I was. I couldn't control myself anymore.


"BRIAN! Stop this right now!" My dad took her in his arms. He was more than mad, he was furious at me. What was he expecting by bringing her there? That I would jumped into her arms and tell her I missed her? He knew I hated her since the day she left and she was the cause of all my problems. I felt extremely dizzy from all of this, I just didn't know what to do. I just wanted to go home, get drunk and wasted. I took my hea into my hands and tried to calm myself which was fucking hard. I was looking everywhere, just pacing around me.


"Can we just fucking film this shit that I can finally go home and SHOOT A FUCKING BULLET THROUGH MY HEAD?!" I yelled at them, I couldn't control my emotions anymore, I was just going crazy, I couldn't control what I was saying. My knees just didn't follow, I collapsed onto the ground and started sobbing like I never did since I was a grown up man.


"Guys.. I.. think we better do this an other day.." I heard my dad sighing behind me, feeling his voice trembling from the emotions. I felt his hand onto my shoulder. He lift me up, I just layed my head onto his shoulder and hugged him, like a little child searching for love, that nobody gave him before. He just hugged me back without saying anything, I could feel him crying too, I calmed myself after a minute or two. As I broke the hug, I looked at my side and I could clearly see her face. She was still crying, her eyes were red, but as much beautiful as they were before. Her lips were dry and really pale, I remembered how great they tasted, how smooth they felt onto mine. I looked at her red small nose that I used to kiss all the time. I just felt the urge to hug her but I knew that doing it was just going to show her that I forgive her, which was far from being true. Her eyes met mine but not for long, she instantly put her head back down.


"Take me home." I said looking at my dad. He nodded and sighed. I knew he was going to bring me at his house, that he wasn't going to leave me home alone after what I just said today. As long as I could just lay down and sleep. I was going to be fine. I knew arguing with him was just talking for nothing so I didn't argue. I knew she was going to be there. I was just too weak. Not feeling like arguing anymore, I didn't want her around but it just didn't matter anymore...

Notes

Omg I've been more than 2 weeks without updating, I'm soooo soorry, I've been so buzy at school lately... BUT I promise I will update more often! Hope you still enjoy the story xxx