High Voltage

As I was in the very last line of the song, I shot my eyes towards the backstage where Pat was standing, hoping and praying to god never to have sing in front of anyone ever. Somehow I wasn’t getting the vibe of that happening. Our manager looked confused, frustrated and scared as he motioned for me to go on. He was scared probably because he knew he’s so gonna get a good ass pounding after the show. This was supposed to be the last fucking song and I was no fucking singer, but he just motioned to carry on with the show.

Carry the fuck on? You have to be fucking kidding me, Bailey right behind my back was off beat for the whole song, I wasn’t sure if she was sober or not, I was leaning more for the second option – high on life, Chris was struggling to keep the balance between lead and rhythm and Franco was creating his own bass line. The whole ending of the show was screwed and Patrick wanted for us to go on. Right now I didn’t give two fucks if Halestorm was running late or not – our front man just ran off, not speaking about Bailey who was too drunk to see her own cymbals and me, who had a feeling I’ll throw up if I have to scream yet another song.

Fuck... this was so fucking fucked.

„Hey guys, turns out this wasn’t our last song,” I looked over the sea of dark faces as I brushed my sweaty hair out of my eyes. „I really think Halestorm is taking the route through New York,” knowing they had a show to play in Nevada before this. I rested my hand on my hip, trying to regain my breath as I leaned to stand one foot on the riser and struggling with that yesterdays Big Mac to keep it inside me. „But whatever, more time for us to entertain you wonderful people,” My eyes travelled to Frank to see him mouth ‘where the fuck is Paul’. Yeah, I was thinking the same fucking thing. Sure, I could blab all fucking night, but these people were here for real music and I couldn’t multitask. I couldn’t sing and play my parts, that was completely out of the question and I swear Chris was about to bail on me if I’ll make him play yet another song with both parts. I know, that was impossible, but let’s just apllaude for a guy who figured how to do it.

What to fucking do? Bring a fan up? With all the fuckery going on with the drums? I swear, not even I could play up to that shit what Bail’s was creating so I didn’t want to make an innocent person go through that miserable experience, when we all knew the drums was the tick of the band and we all played by it. Where the fuck was Halestorm? „Okay... man, I’m clearly no singer, so you’ll have to help me out,”

As I was about to grace our manager with a pleading look, I noticed two of my favorite people standing with him. Pissed like hell, but there they were. Matt fucking Sanders and Brian Haner. „Change of plan,” I happily nearly sang in the microphone as I went running to backstage and up to that cuddly teddy bear, which looked neither cuddly neither like a teddy bear to think about it.

„We need to talk,” I heard Brian say as I stopped in front of them.

„We’ll talk later, I’ll have to save the show now,” I said, my eyes glued to Matt. „Sanders, please tell me you still remember the words to nightmare,”

He frowned, „Of course I do.”

„Great, awesome, take the mic,” I shoved it in his chest, before turning over to Brian, „And you,” I looked up to him, holding out two fingers for Luke so he’d bring two of my babies,

„Meg, we really need to talk,” He insisted, eying me carefully. What the fuck is wrong with you, dude? Can’t you see I’m flipping out right now, whatever it is, it can fucking wait.

„Shut up,” I said taking the guns from my guitar tech and passing one to Brian, „Do the song and we’ll talk later. Oh and Shads? I don’t know what the fuck’s wrong with Bailey, but the drums are way off,” His lineament tensed, making his jaw line perfectly visible. He looked up to drums. Whoa, buddy, I told you to do a song, not react it, I don’t need you to be Bail’s fucking nightmare.

„You don’t have the tape, do you?” He didn’t even turn to face me.

„The tape? What are you fucking crazy? I didn’t know I was doing our show tonight, not speaking being prepared for your gigs at all times.” The fucking pre-recorded tape... He must me joking, „Just do the song and keep the backstage in check, see if Halestorm shows up. If not, Synyster Gates here can do a fucking solo. Are we clear?”

„Crystal.”

„Gates, we’re good?” Finally I turned to look my fiance in the eye. He looked angry, but he didn’t dare to argue with me, seeing how I was on a fucking roll. And not the best kind you’d hope to get.

„Yea,” Somehow it didn’t look like we’re fucking good, but whatever, let’s get this thing rolling. I ran back to the stage, still holding my guitar in my hand as I stopped in front of a soon to be freaked out Frank.

„WHAT’S THE FUCK UP, LA?!” Okay, I think Frank just lost any kind of speaking or even functioning abilities, so it was left up to me to take off his bass from him and switch it to my blue Schecter baby. His perplexed features kept gazing over mister Sanders and Haner, who was now fully up in his stage character winking and teasing the front row of soaking wet females. „I have no idea what’s the fuck going on here, Rave dragged me and Gates up to the stage and told to do Nightmare, are we down for it?” Judging by the undying ovations, they were down even for standing on their heads and doing a 360 only Matt asked them to.

„Look, Frank, Frank... Frank?!” I started, but it didn’t seem like he was hearing anything besides Sanders voice. Goddammit. My hand connected with his cheek. With a confused stare he finally looked at me, „You’re with me, thank you. Listen, you’re doing Nightmare, okay?”

„Wh-wh—„

„Yes, remember the song you played with me as your final exam? Well now you’re gonna play it with Shads and Gates... and Bails.” And I kinda, itsy-bitsy don’t care that it was ages ago.

„But—„

„No ‘butts’, do it,” I pointed a finger at him as I rushed towards Chris, who looked just as confused as I’d be if someone pulled this little stunt on me. But there was no other choice, I couldn’t sing for shit and this show needed to keep rolling, besides 3 rock gigants in one night for thirty bucks? Hell, I’d be happy if I was in the audience. „We need to find Paul!”

„What?” Chris yelled over the loud cheers and Matt’s voice, who was pumping up the crowd with whatever tales they Avenged people told.

„He seemed way off even for him,” I leaned over to yell in his ear, „And I really want to kick his ass,” I smirked back at him as I managed my way around the little mister Starstruck,

„Why couldn’t you just play the solo?” He screamed back at me. That was a real good question. I really hadn’t even considered it.

„Beats me,” I shrugged. Most probably, I kinda was thinking kicking Leroy’s ass was more important than doing a solo. Who the hell even knows what’s going on in my head, I wasn’t drunk, but it darn well felt like it. As I passed Brian, my hand went for a playful slap on his ass. He winked back at me and I could see Synyster Gates ready to take the show away.

„What about Bailey? She knows the song?” Uhmm... I wasn’t that sure about it. My feet stopped just a foot from being in the backdrops and I looked back at Bailey, praying her to not fuck this up.

„Fuck...” Escaped my lips and I swore to myself I’m not praying to anyone ever again in my fucking, goddamned life. Gates and Frank took it away perfectly. Bailey? She fucked it up perfectly. I mean, they could live without a bass... that is if they have real solid beat from the drums. Which they didn’t. I noticed the ‘what the fuck’ look Matt sent Bailey realizing how doomed the whole song was. „Chris, go on and find Paul, okay?”

„What about you?”

„I’ll be the fucking drums...” He gave me nearly the same fucking look Matt shot Bails. Fucking moron, he really thought I was gonna play drums? Give me a fucking break, man. I had something different in mind. Bailey’s drums were still blasting through my in-ear monitor and I couldn’t believe none had taken her out of the mix. Fucking technicians.

So maybe I wasn’t a fucking technician, but I knew how to take someone out of the track, just have to find the... oh here it is! And with that I pulled out a cord under the label of ‘drums’ out of the mixing board and considered to really fire our drum tech. How could he fucking bail in the middle of the show? He was no Leroy, that shit’s not acceptable. Oh did I forget to tell the drums disappeared right before the good part? Yeah, the good part of that ridiculously fast beat. Heads will definetely roll tonight.

„You can smell it in the air ‘cause men like you have such an easy soul to steal what the fuck...” If I wouldn’t have seen Matt’s face, I’d think that ‘what the fuck’ was a part of the song. „So stand in line while they ink numbers in your head, you're now a slave, until the end of time here nothing stops the madness, turning, haunting, yearning, pull the trigger!”

The best I could do for them now was start to clap a more simple pattern of the rhythm for the crowd to take on, ‘cause the shit that was going on here? A complete fucking nightmare. This was the worst show I’d played, like ever. The show with broken ribs? I’d switch to that within a heartbeat if only I had the chance.

Well, the song didn’t completely suck balls, but I think someone’s gonna hate me for this... Thank god Halestorm had showed up. Lizzy was giving me an apologetic look from the backstage in the mean time pleasantly surprised to see Syn and Shads up on stage. What the fuck was going on with my band? They were fucking dicks, that’s what’s going on. If you have to do a show, you don’t fucking drown yourself in booze and you clear as hell don’t take the low start to the backstage in the middle of a fucking show, even if this is a last minute call.

„THANK YOU LA, YOU’RE FANTASTIC AND HAVE FUN WITH THE AMAZING HALESTORM!” Matt held out his hand, jumping backwards off the riser as Syn finished the song with a cool lick. Thank god this shit’s over, I could finally take a deep breath and calm the fuck down.

Luke threw me a bottle of water for me to pour over my head as I felt a pair of arms snake around my waist and a set of teeth bite down on my exposed shoulder. Ex-the-fuck-cuse me? With raised eyebrows I looked back to see Brian still playing his stage diva whore. Yeah, it took him some time to get back to being Brian Haner again, that’s why I’d set myself a rule – attend an Avenged Sevenfold show only if I want to ruin my good mood for the whole fucking week.

„WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS?!” Matt’s voice took over the backstage and I heard Brian sigh heavily against my neck. Yea, I figured he’d be pissed for me dragging him in this mess, but I didn’t think he’d be this fucking angry. „How can you let a drummer on stage seeing she can’t even stand up straight?!”

He pointed towards Bailey, who stumbled her way off stage, yanking that squarey bottle of Jack off the Marshall cabinet. I laced my fingers with Brian’s in search of comfort, feeling almost too uneasy with the situation.

„Shads, just calm the fuck down,” Brian spoke calmly avoiding to touch a nerve in the angry teddy-bear. Just now I noticed our wonderful manager was missing too. That sly fucking dog, I swear I was gonna rip him appart... along with Leroy. Nobody bails a Beautiful Wasteland show, no-fucking-body.

„What the fuck were you thinking?” Matt ignored Brian, pinning Bailey to the Marshall. Uhmm, I kinda just pissed my pants seeing the rage in Matt’s eyes. Was it really about the show anymore or was there something deeper hiding behind Matt’s fury?

Some fans with VIP passes were watching over and I kinda just wanted to hand them a bigass bag of popcorn to go with the fucking show. I pulled away from Brian. Oh come on dude, stop frowning and look around. „We’re not home.” I explained.

He glanced over his shoulder to see three girls standing and gaping at the view. „You’re right.” He stepped in between Matt and Bailey, dragging him away the trainwreck, „Come on dude, let’s go,”

„WHAT THE FUCK, MAN?!” He kept growling and I just stood there making a bet with myself if we’ll be needing a body bag once the night’s over. Once Matt noticed that one of the chicks was holding out an iPhone in front of her, I figured he’s gonna be in for a bit of court work since he knocked the phone away and was it just me or that was a really expensive shatter? „Get that fucking thing away from me!”

With a really heavy sigh, I bent down next to Bailey, who had slid on the ground and now was staring into the deep while raising that bottle of whiskey to her lips every two seconds. „I fucked up,” she whispered.

„You think?” I took a seat beside her, resting my forearms on my knees. She graced me with a glare.

„I’m sorry for the show tho...” She shrugged. Would be nice if you meant it.

„You need help, Bails,” My voice was indifferent since I knew she didn’t give two shits about what I said to her, but that was the truth. I would be so down for her drinking her life away if it didn’t affect the way she saw the world. Bailey Harris was out of control and I was tired of fighting her.

„Meg!” A very concerned Chris came into my notice.

„Yes, sunshine?” Bailey snickered in her bottle. What the hell are you snickering about? You’ll be the one sharing the backseats with Matt.

„Paul’s in hospital,”

„What?” I frowned. „What the hell happened?”

„If I’ll say he got shot, would you believe me?”

„Absolutely fucking not!”

„Then I’ll say he got shot.”

„When?”

„Right when he ran off stage,” I told not to trust Ricky or whatever the fuck his name was. Chris held out his hand and helped me up to my feet. „And no, Meg, no Ricky is to blame for it, although I don’t even believe Ricky exists.”

„Of course he does, I’m pretty positive even in LA you can find a drug dealer named Ricky.” I smirked, „So what the hell happened?”

„I don’t know, Pat’s with him, trying to figure shit out,” Speaking about figuring shit out. We both looked over at the pitiful sight of Bailey Harris drinking her life away.

„Do you mind?” I asked Chris, still trying to come up with an epic plan of how to get her back to her feet, ‘cause god knows Bailey fucking Harris listens to no one, not even herself.

„Actually... I was thinking you could give me a ride,”

„Are you joking? I came here with you!”

„Well yeah, but I kinda... got a bit carried away,” My eyes squinted on him.

„You seem fucking fine to me,”

„Yea, you’d think that, but knowing I emptied a bottle of Bacardi really makes you reconsider, doesn’t it?”

„Fuck,” I breathed, angrily rubbing my face. I don’t know which one of the guys drove here, but I sense none of them would be too happy to know they’ll have to drive a drunk Chris and Bailey back to Huntington Beach, „What about Frank?”

„he already left.” What? Well ain’t this just perfect.

So... after a good fifteen minutes of struggle with Bailey’s drunk ass and stupid stubbornness, we had gotten to... Brian’s fucking BMW. Why doesn’t they ever take Matt’s Escalade... that is fucking big and comfy for these long ass trips? „let me go...” Bailey mumbled, trying to yank herself off from our shoulders. Come on, put some effort in it and really get off me. You’re fucking heavy...

Matt and Brian were leaning against the BMW, having a smoke break. Oh how I craved a good smoke right now... Brian’s cigarette stopped midway to his lips once he noticed our little trio enclosing in on them. A silent ‘fuck’ left him, before he dropped the remainders of the cigarette to the ground and came towards us, making Matt turn his head over.

„Babe—„ He took Bailey from me and Chris and despite her attempts to fight him, Brian picked her up bridal style and carried over to the car. I don’t know what the hell was happening between Matt and Bailey, but judging by that glare, he fucking finally didn’t want anything to do with her. Honestly? This was really fucking over due by now.

„Bri, Chris too will catch a ride with us,” I opened the back door so he’d place Bails in the back seats.

„Yea, sure...” He replied and I just hoped no one was standing in the fucking parking lot with a camera and snip-snapping pictures. I walked up to Matt, who seemed to be completely zoned out and just got on my tiptoes and hugged the shit out of that teddy bear.

„Thank you,” He whispered, blowing out a cloud of smoke over my shoulder.

„Okay, who’s sitting in the back?” Bri asked as I pulled away from Matt.

„Me, I guess, I’m smaller.”

„No,Meg. Your place is by Gates,” Matt argued, stomping out his cigarette, before walking around me and Brian and getting in the car. Ookay.

I watched as Chris dragged his feet as he moved his way around the car, before I, myself, got in. To be completely honest, even tho the situation denied any laughter, it looked very fucking hilarious with the passed out Bailey who was drooling all over Matt’s shoulder and Chris, who was hardly keeping his eyes open.

As Brian started the engine, his hand sneaked his way towards the glove compartment to take his mints and pop a couple in his mouth, before pulling out of the parking lot. Ooh, Marlboro’s. Thank you very fucking much, I finally feel like smoking. My finger pressed the button to open the window as I pulled a cigarette out of the pack and let it linger between my lips. While Brian was hypnotizing his left, waiting for an opening to get on the highway, I decided to turn the volume up not caring if someone’s annoyed by the pop crap that’s blasting through the speakers. I picked up the zippo lighter from the dashboard and light up the cigarette, taking a long and fucking awesome drag.

Brian stepped on the gas, nearly bumping in the side of a Mercedes, I guess too tired of waiting for a clear shot. Even tho it was fucking late, there still were traffic jams. That’s why I fucking hated LA, but I liked the nightly breeze and a drive through the city... that is as long as I’m not sitting behind the wheel. I blew out the smoke and then I heard it, the shout that made me nearly have a fucking heart-attack.

„Are you crazy?!” He yanked the cigarette out of my fingers and threw it out the open window. Uhmm... okay? Even Matty-poo jumped in his seat back there. As for Bailey and Chris? They were long lost in their dream land. „Are you really fucking smoking?” He shot me a quick glare, before turning back to the road, leaving me really fucking confused.

„Care to explain why are you yelling at me?” I’ve been smoking since I remember myself and he’s never had problems with it. „And what’s up with coming to the show with that fucked up attitude?” I knew Luke must’ve told him where I was, but what the hell, man? If you’re in a shitty mood, you don’t come and ruin the day for everyone else unless you want to get punched in the face.

He let out a frustrated sigh, before stopping in front of a red light. His eyes looked connected with the rear-view mirror. „Shads, where to?”

„Answer me when I’m talking to you!” I cried out really, really, really confusedly discontent with everything and everyone.

„Can we talk this out when we get home?”

„Absolutely fucking not!” I shouted, „If you don’t tell me right now, I’ll smoke this whole fucking pack even if it kills me!”

„Aren’t you the last bit worried about the baby, Meg? That’s the reason why I even drove to LA, why the fuck are you putting yourself through this shit again?”

„The hell you’re talking about?”

„The pregnancy test you left on the counter...” He explained while switching lanes.

„You’re pulling my leg, aren’t you...” I laughed out, resting my feet on the panel. There’s no fucking way I’m pregnant. He didn’t reply. My face dropped. „Holly shit, I’m pregnant...” I mumbled to myself. „Fuck, Brian, don’t be mad, I didn’t know...” I took his hand in mine.

„You did the test, didn’t you?” he hissed, but didn’t pull out of my touch. He’s too easy. Once he looked at me, I made my best puppy dog eyes and stretched out my lower lip, hearing a low laugh from behind me. Brian’s lips went up in a smirk.

„Shit, you’re both are meant to be together,” I heard Matt say and when i looked back at him, I saw Bailey sleeping on Chris’s shoulder now and Matt leaning in to snake his arms around my seat. „Meg, do you think you’d let Gates celebrate a little tonight?”

„Why the hell you’re asking me permission? I’m going with you guys,” Brian jerked his head, a warning in his eyes. „Relax, I’m not drinking, stupid, I just want to try and bribe Johnny or Monk, or Keith or whoever the fuck’s working tonight into those delicious chicken wings they don’t fucking serve no more.”

„And what do we do with Bailey?” Brian asked, catching Matt’s eyes in the rear-view mirror.

„Drop her at my place, I’m gonna crash with you guys.” So I think that meant the end of that relationship. Oh well...

„Woohoo, a fucking sleepover! I’m so down for it!” At least my stupidity could still bring out a smile on people.

Notes