High Voltage

„Baby, can I have some money?” Madison ran up to Chris, a radiant smile pulling on her lips.

„What for?” He was already pulling for his wallet from the back pocket of his jeans, as she tugged a strand of her perfectly straight brown bangs behind her ear.

„For Charity,” I couldn’t bare, but to snicker in my drink hearing my favorite stripper’s name.

„What?” Chris frowned, looking at his stunning girl. I swear, if I wasn’t straight, I’d bang her, along with all of these wonderful dancers here. Except for Amber. She looked a little too rough around the edges and I couldn’t quite still put my finger if she had a dick between her legs or not. But, hey, I’m without prejudices, if she decided to do me and lost the bitchy attitude, I’d consider it. „Like hell I’m giving you cash to throw at some strippers!”

„Hey, easy there, dude,” I snapped, pointing a finger at him, „Charity is wonderful and no one talks about my favorite stripper like that,” I put my glass on the neon like table, as I took the wallet from my bag and handed Madison a couple of fifties. „Here, and tell Charity Meg says hi.”

„Thanks Meg, you’re the best!” She exclaimed, before throwing herself around and managing her way back to the stage. I still wondered how she could get her way with those Jimmy Choo’s, but hey, whatever floats her boat and gets me a glimpse of her fine ass.

„Why did you just give her money?” Chris looked at me from his seat, a very disapprooving look over his face. „It’s not like she’s putting it to a good use anyway...”

„Dude, Charity is a good investement, believe me...” And I knew. The girl really knew how to shake her buttocks. „Besides don’t tell me you don’t remember those great tits from back in the day?”

„I can hardly keep track of what’s happening now, why do you suppose I’d know who’s Charity?” Oh right, you were the one who didn’t hook up with strippers...

„Then maybe you should go easy on the blow, huh?” I could smell those white lines even from here. Since he got together with Madison, which by the way was a reasonable time ago, he’s been showing her the ways of a rockstar with all the possible highs and lows. Thank god I had gotten out of that shit a fucking long time ago. Since Warped I was playing clear, well... as clear as it gets for a guitarist of a band which’s earning millions. But hey, a little party never killed nobody, right? Right?! Tell me I’m right!

„I’m just laying off some steam, you know that,” He said as I fixed my eyes on one certain dancer with a rocking body. Fuck, why didn’t I born into this goddamned world as a man instead of ... this? I mean, I had the body of a fucking twelve year old boy, mind the boobs who could be fucking bigger if I may add and if I wouldn’t have my now super blond bangs (thanks to Bailey’s hairdresser skills and her drunken choice of what color she should die my hair), I believe people would confuse me with a dude from behind, not even minding that I was 5’3. There was absolutely nothing girly about me, not even the way I lounged on this leather armchair, my ankle over my knee and a bottle of Bud Light in my hand.

„So what are the thoughts of being back in California?” He questioned right when one of the strippers landed in a rather painful looking split. Ouch.

„Sucks balls... Was so much better back in Hawaii,” I referred to my little vocation which ended just a few days ago. „Had completely forgot about the condition of 5th, it’s fucking ridiculous to get up two hours early just to get to the studio in time!”

„You’ve been back to studio? Already?” He raised his eyebrows.

„Yeah, I mean what’s else there to do? Now when you’re with Madison, Matt’s finally having his wicked ways with Bails and Frank’s off to his parents, what am I supposed to do other than work?” To be frank, I really had nothing to do here, „And god forbid I’d call Paul and ask to hang out.”

„There’s always Gates...” The bottle stopped midtrack to my lips hearing that name. I swear I was about to bash him with this bottle right here. He was a taken man as far as I heard from Matt and the press and god knew none of us wanted to actually see one another.

„You don’t really wanna go there, Chris,” I warned him, narrowing my eyes on some stripper, but that didn’t necesseraly mean I was really seeing her. My thoughts traveled way back, to that damned tour of wrong choices and bad decisions. He fucking proposed, what a fucking dick... And I fucking said yes!

„I thought you were still kinda you know... friends?”

„Yeah, that’s the story we agreed to tell to the press,” I snorted, glaring somewhere in the deep. Basically that was the only thing we agreed on, other than the fact that we’d kill each other without second thoughts if we, out of pure madness, would run into each other.

„What the hell did even happen between the two of you? One day you were happy with the thought of being back together and the next day I know you fly off to fucking Tokyo!”

„We had our... misunderstandings,” yeah, right... That’s fucking mildly said. And no, no cheating was involved to my and your surprise. That was until a certain point. Actually, he was on his best behavior since we were planning to get married. I even was pregnant, I didn’t know why, but he treated me like I was the fucking queen of England, not that I minded, but then the inevidable happened. I lost the baby due to a very heavy miscarrige and that was when the shit hit the fan. In everyone’s else eyes he was still the same Brian Haner, since none even knew I was pregnant besides me and him... and Matt. But that’s it. So when I lost the baby, I fell in a fucking pitch black depression and he started drowning himself in booze. He swore he hates me and couldn’t stand being around me more than a couple minutes a day. That shit, obviously, led to me throwing that expensive ass ring in his face and flying out to Tokyo where Alexis was having her vocation at the time and I kinda just took off from there. For the last months I had been traveling around the world, simply having a blast. I got out of my depression thanks to the Beautiful Wasteland army and last month I decided to spend in Hawaii. I’d returned just a few days ago. And I think I was slowly starting to fall back into the misery this place reminded me of. And guess which is the most fun part out of it all? He’s dating a girl who’s barely out of the risk zone. I wasn’t afraid of the word ‘hate’, ‘cause that was pretty much what I felt for him.

„So you haven’t seen him since?”

„Nope,” I popped the ‘p’, „and hope not to.”

„Oh cool, so you’re not going to Shads’ party tonight either?” Tonight? What was the time? My eyes dropped to my wristwatch... Six fucking thirty two PM? And we were in a strip club... yeah seems about right.

„If he’s there – no.”

He started laughing, bringing my confused attention to him, „I can bet on a hundred bucks you’ll show up,”

„Nope, not gonna happen, Achilles.”

„I call bullshit!” He called and punched my arm.

„How dare you!”

„Oh shit, I didn’t mean to hit you that hard...”

„What? No... I mean how dare you call bullshit on me? I don’t wanna see him- he doesn’t wanna see me. Period.” Altough I kinda wanted to see him. And I also kinda wanted to be a dude, but we don’t see that happening in the nearest future, now do we?

„But I think he does want to see you,” He smiled at me.

„He... does?” I frowned, taking a mouthful of that sapless beer.

„Man, you’re easy!” He exploded in laughter and for a slight second I swear I was about to loose my cool and strangle him right then and there with these little hands.

„You’re a dick...” I pouted into my drink.

„Hey, you’ll never know if you won’t come... Just for an hour, Meg...”

„Why are you pushing this?”

„Because, love of my life, I know you’re dying to see him and I also know you’ve been googling the shit out of him lately.”

„You’ve been spying on me?” I cocked an eyebrow.

„Hey, you brought me your laptop to fix whatever you’ve done to it. It’s my duty as a citizen of United States to see who you’re stalking.” He chuckled lightly. „And if I may say, the history of your browsers are really disgusting... I mean, really? Toddlers and Tiaras?”

Fuck Toddlers and Tiaras, I needed to figure if seeing my ex would kill me, if seeing Brian Haner would tear me apart, if meeting my demons up close would rip me open...

Notes

Welcome back!
And I told you this won't be as easy as it may seem. I wouldn't be me if I just let them live happily every after *evil snickering*

Anyhow, sorry if I didn't manage to answer to your comments on the Danger Line, I really appreciated them tho, but I swear I'll gonna try and show my appreciation to every single one of you!