Jimmy

I guess that I should probably start with a slight confession; I know absolutely nothing about babies. There’s a fine line between taking care of yourself and making sure that you actually pass out in the house when you’re stinking drunk and taking care of a whole other life. It’s like learning a whole new language, and I’m terrible when it comes to memorizing things. Nevertheless, when Brian asks us to all to pitch in and help protect and watch over Athena, like my brothers- all of whom share a similar stance to me, step up to the plate and agree. Which left me to laugh as Zacky and Matt tried to work out how to keep a child entertained for longer than twenty seconds, Johnny nearly collapsed in horror when it came to changing diapers, and Brian had sat with Athena for nearly an hour and a half as she screamed bloody murder, only for Bianca to come down and sort everything out in about three minutes flat.

I see the way Gates stares at her these days; that look of complete admiration and awe when her back is turned, as she moves so naturally with the smaller child. Not only does astound the rest of us, but I know that she’s wondering how she does it so effortlessly too. But, here I am, sat with Athena balancing on my lap as she plays with a stuffed blue octopus, staring at up at me with those big eyes that just scream ‘hug me, I’m adorable’.

Another confession for you all; I love kids. Sure, I might not know how to burp one after being fed or how to tie their shoelaces in the morning, for when Athena gets a little older, but I know that they’re fun to be around, and that just one smile can light up a whole room better than the biggest wattage of a bulb. But I couldn’t help it, when Vee suddenly announced that she wanted a baby; my heart started to pound like a kick drum between my ribs, my palms started to sweat, my eyes deliberately avoiding her questioning gaze. I’ve thrown myself into helping out Brian, if only to avoid my girlfriend just that little bit longer.

She’s been giving me the cold shoulder and I’ve been tuning out the sound of her words, hoping to God that I don’t die of some sort of panic attack. That’s not possible- is it?

Bianca is sat next to me on the couch in the conservatory, head lolling back against the cushions and breathing slowly. She hasn’t had a full night’s sleep in months, and often as I lie awake in the middle of the night, I’ll hear her pacing with the baby, whispering soothing words of comfort to the little girl as she waits for sleep to come. Come to think of it, I’ve never once heard Brian out there with Athena- just Bianca. During the day, when she’s sleepy and cute and doesn’t make too much noise, he hovers over her like she’s about to shot, but at night when she’s cranky and tired- it’s like he doesn’t know she exists. In my arms, Athena starts to wave her arms around and her face crinkles up like a scrunched up piece of paper, and immediately alarm bells ring in my head.

“Hey Bianca- she looks like she’s about to start the waterworks again…” I warn her softly and she almost leaps up out of her seat, kneeling down in front of the two of us and catching my gaze.
“Just soothe her Master Jimmy, it’s alright. Bounce her up and down a little bit, rock her- something comforting” she says, carefully running her hand over the little girls head and feeling for a temperature, working out exactly what’s wrong with. And as requested, I start to rock Athena gently, singing a lullaby under my breath as I hold her tightly against my chest. Surprisingly, she starts to settle and within minutes, her eyes are fluttering sleepily and she curls up, clambering for the warmth of my skin.

“Hey…I did it. I calmed her down…” I say, surprised.
“Of course you did. You’re a natural with her Master Jimmy” Bianca replies, standing up and brushing down the dust from her skirt. I’m a still a little uncomfortable being called Master Jimmy now that Bianca’s such a prominent part of our lives, but Gates hasn’t relinquished her of her duties and her debt that she was here to carry out. The only way he can really do that, is to ask her to be his, much like Vee belongs to me and Alex belongs to Zacky. It doesn’t always involve sex, hell when I asked Vee to be mine to begin with, we were nothing more than friends until I realised I was in love with her.

The door to the conservatory slides open and Brian steps in, tousled haired and slightly upset looking, and as soon as Bianca notices the new arrival, she slips down onto her knees, head bent so she’s staring at her open palms. That’s another thing that unnerves me- she shouldn’t have to kneel for any of us anymore. If anything, she is one of us. Without her, Athena would be in the worst hands possible, and we’d have the mistreatment of a young child on our consciences. But obviously, Brian can’t see past what he wants- and what he will get out of keeping her around as a slave.
“Bianca, Vengeance would like some help setting up Athena’s nursery- he’s upstairs on the first door to the right” Brian orders flatly and she nods, getting up and barely casting another glance at the two of us as she disappears, a slightly miserable limp in her step as she walks.

I know how hopelessly in love with Gates she’s been since she walked through our front doors, yet he doesn’t see her as anything more than a common slave.

“You blind son of a bitch” I mutter as Brian flops down onto the couch next to me, and he quirks one eyebrow in my direction, mouth opening wide to send my comment shivering into the dust.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“What do you think Brian? She’s taking care of this child, she’s the one that’s bending over backwards to keep her alive, and you can barely look at her! Without her we’d be lost Brian- why aren’t you at least treating her with a little respect?” I ask, careful not to raise my voice too loud as Athena drifts into sleep in my arms. He’s silent for a moment, thinking over everything that I’ve just said and runs a hand through his spiky hair, sighing loudly.
“What am I supposed to do? She’s a servant, she’s here on a sentence, she’s…”

“She’s Bianca- a human being” I cut him off, gently beginning to rock the child in my arms. “You saw it, as soon as you walked in she was on her knees, she still calls everyone Sir or Master. She’s terrified of us all- yet she’s here helping us without complaint. What are you going to do when her sentence runs out? Force her to stay? She could leave at any time- and she’s going that way if you don’t shape up and change your attitude” I say wisely, glancing over at my old friend, who looks like he’s torn between a rock and a hard place.
“What do you want me to do?” he asks finally, and I glance over my shoulder to check that there’s no one eavesdropping.

“Revoke her sentence. Ask her to be yours or even just to be something more than someone who cooks our food, cleans our house and takes care of the baby. I don’t care what you have to do, Brian, just get it done” I say simply, but judging by the expression that he gives me, it’s almost like I’ve told him in Japanese to scale Mt Everest and recite the bible in Greek. Shock doesn’t even begin to explain it, that’s for sure.
“But Jimmy I can’t…” he begins and I cut him off once again, using my free hand to grab his arm and stare him directly in the eye, cold blue against warm if not slightly worried chocolate brown.

“Brian, you and I both know that within these four walls, we can do anything we want to do. Zacky can burn down one half of the house, I can cartwheel in the bathroom- and you can revoke Bianca’s sentence. I know somewhere in that shell of a body there is a heart that beats for one of the women in this household, and to win the heart of that woman you’ve got to start showing some compassion” I tell him and finally he sighs, nodding now that he knows I won’t back down from my argument.
“Go- do it now. Before it’s too late and Zacky throws her in the basement for using the wrong kind of hammer” I order and without a second glance at me, Brian nearly damn throws himself off of the couch and walks back out into the large house, biting annoyingly at his thumbnail as he does. I don’t see what he’s so scared of- she’s just another woman in this house. It’s not like she’s grown another few heads or anything.

Smiling, I glance down at a peacefully sleeping Athena, I slip my finger into her fist and she holds on tightly, almost as though she were missing something. And that’s when I notice it- a black mark underneath her babygro. As I slowly pull back the thin material, my eyes widen in shock at what I find there.

Laced across the skin of her collar- is a tattoo.