Chapter Forty-Five:

“Angela!” Someone shouted behind me. I turned to see Matt running up behind me.
“Hey, what’s up, Speed Racer?” I asked him. He chuckled.

“I just wanted to catch you before you headed home. We’re going to practice at Jimmy’s – you guys want to tag along?” He asked. Jace shrugged.

“I’m down.” I told him. As soon as Jace opened his mouth some skinny, little, blonde thing came up and attached herself to his arm. He smirked as she whispered in his ear.

“Well, I just got plans. Rain check?” Jace asked Matt.

“Sure thing, bro.” He laughed.

“I’ll see you at home. Go have fun.” I sent him off.

“I always do.” He waved and headed off with his lady-friend. I shook my head. Matt put an arm around me.

“Have I told you how beautiful you look today?” He asked me. I shrugged. “You really do.” He kissed me and led me to his car.

“Are you guys working on any new stuff?” I asked him. He nodded.

“We’ve been working on a new song, trying to fine tune it.”

“That’s awesome.” I smiled at him.

“Are you feeling okay?”

“Feeling okay is overrated.” I sighed. “I’m not really sure how I’m feeling.”

“I think Brian really likes talking to you.” Matt changed his subject.

“It’s mutual.” I told Matt. He smiled.

“It’s pretty awesome that you get along with my friends.”

“They make it easy.”

“I think you remind Brian of his older sister.”

“I didn’t know he had a sister.”

“Yeah, he doesn’t see her much anymore, but they used to be inseparable. He told me that your writing is really good.” He glanced over to me. I blushed.

“It’s okay.”

“He’s really critical as far as English goes. If he says it’s good, it must be.”

“So, what’s the song about?” I asked him.

“You’ll just have to wait to hear it.”

-.-

“Angela! Did you bring any food with you?” Brian asked when we went inside Jimmy’s place. I shook my head.

“No, sorry. It was kind of short notice.” I told him. He looked like I kicked his puppy. “We could always go grab food after you guys practice.” I suggested.

“A woman who likes food. You should hold onto her.”

“I intend to.” Matt smirked. “Is everyone downstairs?” He asked. Brian nodded. “Cool.” We headed to the basement and saw the guys warming up. I sat on a nearby couch and watched them. I pulled out my sketch pad and journal. I started sketching them as they started playing.

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost.
It’s empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over.

I took turns watching and drawing the guys as they performed. Jimmy has his eyes closed. Matt is clutching the microphone.

I found you here.
Now, please stay for awhile.
I can move on with you around.
I hand you my mortal life, but will it be forever?

I’d do anything to see you smile.
Holding you till our time is done…
We both know the day will come, but I don’t want to leave you.

I took out my phone and snapped some pictures of them, references for later. I kept drawing and listening.

Trials in life, questions of us existing here,
Don’t wanna die without you here…
Please tell me what we have is real.

So, what if I never hold you, yeah,
Or kiss your lips again?
So, I never want to leave you.
And the memories of us to see, I beg don’t leave me.

I put the pencil down and just watched them. Jimmy’s eyes were getting pink. I can see small trails of wet down his cheeks. Is he the one who wrote this? He put his drumsticks down and walked away from the band. The guys stopped playing. I got up and followed him. I don’t know him very well, but maybe he just needs someone to lean on, a woman’s touch.

“Jimmy?” I asked. He’s sitting in another room in the basement, shaking with his face in his hands. He didn’t move or look up when I announced myself. “Do you want to be alone?” I tried again.

“No,” he whispered. “Stay.” He looked up, just for a split second. He looks like he’s hurting more than he can say. I kneeled in front of him and wrapped my arms around him. I let him cry into my shoulder.

“Who was she?”

“Sarah, she we were together for two years before she found out she had cancer. She died over a year ago.” He confessed.

“You wrote the song about her?”

“Matt helped. I couldn’t do it alone. I thought it would make it easier, but it’s just brought up so many things.”

“Let it all out. It’s okay. I’m here.” I whispered.

“And with what Matt went through with you, just hearing about it, reminded me so much of what I went through with her…”

“It will easier.”

“When?”

“With time. I lost my mom and it still hurts, but you’ll learn how to be okay with her gone. She’s still watching over you. You’re not alone.” I told him. “Just breathe.” I reminded him. He nodded against me. “Have you tried talking to someone about it?”

“I’m talking to you.”

“I mean someone professionally?”

“I did for a while. It didn’t help much. She was a raging bitch.” He lifted his face and mopped his face with his hand. I chuckled.

“I know a guy, if you wanna try talking with someone else.” I suggested. He nodded.

“I think it would really help.”

“Awesome. I’ll get you his number.” I promised. I got up and offered him a hand. He took it but didn’t really use it. I started to pull away but he tightened his grip.

“Hey, thank you.” He told me.

“Don’t mention it.” I smiled. “Let’s go find everyone before they demolish the contents of your kitchen.”

Notes

Okay, so there may be more chapters left in this than I anticipated.

Music Credit: "Seize The Day" -- Avenged Sevenfold