Video Star

Boo it’s Monday again but it’s ok I guess, not like I have to do anything other than film but that’s like an all-day thing so Brian was going to go hang out with the guys today after he dropped me at home ‘bye baby’ I smiled as he pulled up to my house, ‘bye, I love you’ ‘I love you too’ I whispered then leaned over and kissed him, he kissed back and smiled when I pulled away ‘I’ll text you when I'm down filming’ I said and he nodded, we kissed a few more times then I got out of his car and he stayed until I got in my house. I headed to my room and set up the candles and things I got at the mall on Saturday then I showered, when I finished I dried off then blow dried my hair and did my makeup a little, just eyeliner and mascara. I put on a dress and heels then picked up my laundry and headed over to go start a load. Once everything was started I grabbed my phone and a soda then headed down to the basement to set up, I made sure I had everything then I sat on the couch and turned on my camera.

‘Hey guys!’ I said and waved a little ‘first of all I’d like to address the big question of whether or not Syn and I are going out and the answer is yes, but I will not talk about it because we are both very privet people. Just because you guys get to see me for an hour or two three times a week doesn’t mean I want you knowing everything about my life and if you can't respect that then you can go ahead and stop watching me because that’s just the way it is. Now that that’s out of the way, as you can see by the title I'm going to be talking about my bullying and abuse experiences’ I explained then I took a sip of my drink and crossed my legs right over left ‘let’s see, I wasn’t bullied to bad I guess but I still was. Now, if you’ve been following me for a while then you’d know that I’ve always been fat, I’ve been fat since I was probably four or five so daycare into high school I was always made sun of for my weight and it was just the usual comments. “lose weight, you're fat, you're ugly” blah blah blah’ I said as I rolled my eyes

‘Once I got into high school though it definitely calmed down, I don’t remember why but I've been dressing “goth” I guess you could say, since about fifth grade so maybe that’s why of maybe it’s because in eighth grade my grandfather died and I completely changed into a different person. I didn’t go to school for like two weeks and when I got back I had a complete breakdown in my first period so my friends had to walk me down to the nurse. I hated everyone, everything, I didn’t care about anything anymore. I started harming myself and it was just bad but I was definitely meaner to everyone at school and that’s just the way it was so, back to the story. My high school had to get split because there were too many kids so all the freshman had to go to the annex which was the whole top floor of the other middle school in our area and we weren’t allowed downstairs unless you had to go to the library, the nurse, had gym in the morning or for lunch and to leave of course.

Now with that being explained I had made some more friends and all the friends I had in middle school were in my math class so we were all shoved into a room together for two hours because we had B lunch so we would have half an hour of class, then have half an hour of lunch then another 45ish minutes of class because C lunch still had to eat but anyway, that class was absolutely terrible. We all mostly hated each other so no one got along unless they were friends you know what I mean? And we didn’t like the teacher either, my friends and I never really said anything but the other kids were just awful to her and they actually made her cry one day because they wouldn’t listen, they wouldn’t do their work, they’d lie and cuss the whole time we were in there and they wouldn’t stop talking and one day we were all in groups of five I think and we all had our desks together and the teachers aid was sitting with me and my friends and an argument broke out.

I don’t remember what it was about but I had just had it and I was getting very angry so I asked the helper if I could step out or I was gonna lose it so she let me. I walked out of the room and before the door even shut I punched a locker with my left hand and I actually dented it, like that poor kid couldn’t get into his locker until the next day because I hit it so hard and no I didn’t break anything if you're wondering’ I explained then drank my soda a bit and set it back down. ‘The semester before that some of the kids that were in my math class second semester were also in it first semester so we had a pretty good ban together attitude but that’s not the point. In my first semester math class there was this really creepy ugly kid that wouldn’t leave anyone alone and usually I'm not one to judge until I get to know the person, well I knew him and I didn’t like him at all. He was always up in everyone’s business and wouldn’t leave anyone alone no matter how many times we told the teacher or told him to go away,

One day he was bothering my friend that I’ve known since elementary school, we weren’t really friends anymore though but we were still friendly, anyway, he was bothering her and wouldn’t leave her alone. So she looked over at me for help and I’ll tell ya, one of the perks of being fat and dressing the way I did, you could intimidate mostly anyone and I was definitely stronger then this kid, he was a tooth pick but anyway, I stood up and walked over there and told him that if he didn’t leave her alone I’d snap his neck, and he walked away’ I said and laughed a little then drank some more of my coke ‘now you guys are probably like “oh my god you were a bully!” no, I was standing up for someone, it’s different! And by the way, I had already fought this tooth pick in middle school so he was scare of me anyway and it wasn’t even a fight, it was a get away from her and or I’ll kill you type of fight. But, I wasn’t a bully.

Now, nothing else happened after that and then in tenth grade we got to go over to the main building where all the upper classmen were, I met a few more friends that year and we did pretty much anything we wanted and didn’t care, we were basically the power couple but we weren’t a couple. Nothing too bad happened that year, I was mostly body guard or fight breaker upper to all the girl fights and the girl I made friends with that year got into a fight because another girl was going around trash talking her and her brother so, she did the only thing she could think of and that was almost kill this girl. She bashed her head on one of the pillars in the lunch room then slammed her into the side of one of those long lunch tables and started banging her head into the table. It took me, another student and a teacher to pull my friend off and all she did after I pulled her off was fix her hair and ask if she could go get her stuff’ I smiled and laughed a little then looked down at my phone to look at the time

‘Now I've never been in a physical fight but I have been in screaming matches and I always win. The one time I can remember clearly was eleventh grade, my friend that I was just telling you about was pregnant and a lower classmen was talking shit about her so she went over and confronted her and just told her to stop and my friend is like already seven months by now so she’s huge. Anywho, she had to stay after school that day and I heard that the girl that was talking shit said that she was going to kick my friend in the stomach and make her lose her baby and I heard this from the other girls friend so she’s the one that felt my wrath and got screamed at and I kinda made her cry but I didn’t care, you don’t say that about someone and expect to get away with it considering nothing in our high school stays a secret for long and after that everything was chill with everyone. Now, senior year is when I met my ex and I’ll talk about him in a second, the only fight I had to break up senior year was between two tenth grade girls,

I don’t remember what they were fighting about but I let them go at it for a bit then I pulled them away and I knew one of them so she’s the one I grabbed and she had actually broken a ring punching this other girl in the face, some teachers came and took both girls then I went to my class and everything was fine until second semester, now this probably won’t make sense but my ex and I had broken up for like a month or so and within that time period I got a girlfriend and she was only in tenth grade and we went out for maybe a month and she had told me that some guy I knew had tried to kiss her and obviously I wasn’t happy about that and this guy was in my math class and he already knew I didn’t like him, I haven't liked him since middle school because he used to stalk me so, he tried talking to me about why he tried to kiss my girlfriend and I screamed at him so bad he dropped out of school like I'm not even kidding,

He dropped out after that class and we were only like a month away from graduation so I guess that time I was the bully but I had good reason and hold on my phones ringing’ I said as I looked at my lap to see it was Brian so I answered it ‘hello?....Uhh, chocolate….yeah I'm downstairs filming…..you too, bye’ I smiled then hung up and set my phone back down ‘whooo I'm getting ice cream’ I said happily as I danced in my seat a little ‘what was I talking about? Oh right, that time I was the bully but I haven't done anything like that since and that’s my bullying story I guess. Now I'm going to get into the abuse part of this video so if you don’t wanna hear it then you can leave’ I said as I shifted a little then re-crossed my legs ‘now, like I said I met my ex in senior year, I was 17 and he was already 21 so he wasn’t in school and I'm not going to go into how we met so don’t ask. Everything was good the first few days and then it went downhill.

To me, all abuse is abuse, I don’t care if it’s mental, verbal or physical, it’s still a form of abuse and it’s awful. Everything was fine the first few weeks I guess and then the mental and verbal abuse started and they kind of go hand in hand because without the verbal abuse then it wouldn’t really be mental abuse if that makes sense, but he would always call me stupid, or if I just hugged another guy that was my friend I was a slut and a whore and everything nasty you could think of I was called. After a few weeks of that it turned physical, I always fought back though even if it made it worse. And of course since I was still going to school he’d hit me where no one would see and he made sure he didn’t beat me too bad that I ended up in the hospital because he didn’t want questions so it was mostly body shots and mental abuse while that was happening and this went on for four years, until I moved out here. And the physical abuse wasn’t just beatings if you know what I'm trying to say,

If not then don’t ask, just figure it out. I let it go on for so long because I didn’t want to die for leaving him but I knew I was going to die for staying with him and the only reason I moved out here and broke up with him was because of M. Shadows. I was talking to him on the phone one night after being abused and I was on the phone with him for maybe half an hour before my ex came out and I wouldn’t tell him who I was talking to so he just beat me right there completely forgetting that I was on the phone and Matt could hear everything that was going on. Once my ex left Matt was screaming my name through the phone and when I answered him again he begged me to move so the next morning I started looking at houses and here I am’ I said then looked back when I heard Brian come down, I smiled and he smiled back then sat next to me and kissed my head ‘I only saw my ex once after I moved and that was when I was on tour,

Matt and Syn beat him up and I haven't seen him since and now everything’s perfect’ I said softly as I looked over at him, he smiled and we kissed a few times making me smile ‘please don’t do what I did, get out of whatever type of relationship that’s abusive, I don’t care if it’s your boyfriend, girlfriend or family. You need to get out of the situation as soon as possible, go to whoever you trust and tell someone; don’t live with it because it’s not healthy, get help. Now, since that was a sadish video, I’ll be back on Wednesday with music. Bye guys!’ I said and waved bye then turned off the camera and leaned back against Brian, he wrapped his arms around my shoulders and I smiled ‘where’s my ice cream?’ I asked and he laughed, I pulled away and looked at him with a smile ‘it’s upstairs’ he said, I nodded and then reached for the camera and took out the SD Card, grabbed my phone then stood, my laptop was already upstairs

‘You know, you look very sexy’ ‘oh yeah?’ I asked and he nodded a little as he looked me over ‘maybe you’ll get something later if you're good’ I smirked then walked away and upstairs. I walked into the living room and set down my phone and SD Card on my laptop then walked into the kitchen and saw my cup of ice cream on the counter so I grabbed it then went back into the living room and sat on the couch next to Brian, I opened up my laptop and stuck the card in the slot then waited for it to load ‘you need a new laptop’ Brian said and I nodded a little ‘I know, this fucking this is irritating’ I said referring to my 8 year old acer, I've had to replace the hard drive twice which made me lost everything important, I've had to replace the adapter once and it takes forever to load everything ‘I think I might buy a new one but I haven't decided’ I said as I edited some things then started the long YouTube upload process as I leaned back against Brian and finished off my ice cream then got up and threw away the trash,

Brian and I went out to smoke. When we got back inside we went back into the living room and I laid back on the couch and rested my legs in his lap. He ran his hand up my calve to my thigh slowly then looked over at me, I smiled then motioned him down to me so he leaned down a little and kissed me, I kissed back and we started making out but there was a knock at my door so we pulled away and I sighed ‘who is it!?’ I yelled not bothering to move ‘us!’ I heard Matt yell, I just shook my head ‘it’s open!’ I yelled again then went back to kissing Brian ‘well, sorry for interrupting’ I heard and I pulled away and looked over to see the guys standing there so Brian sat up and moved over a little but my legs were still on his lap as the guys all sat down around us ‘so, what's up?’ I asked as I leaned up on my elbows a little, Matt cleared his throat then looked at his hands ‘what?’ I asked as I sat up all the way and looked over at him

‘We um, we found something out that you're not gonna like’ he said and I just rose an eyebrow at him ‘Jeff moved in down the street’ Johnny said quickly and I looked over at him ‘what?’ I asked and he just nodded a little. I stood up and went around the entire house to make sure everything was locked and all the lights were off even though it’s like the middle of the day. ‘Baby….baby you have to calm down’ Brian said as he set his hands on my arms but I just shook my head ‘I can't calm down! How did he find me!? I've been so careful, I can't, I can't’ I started quickly then started having a panic attack ‘ok ok, calm down, breath’ Brian whispered as he sat me on the couch and started rubbing my back slowly and a few seconds later there was water in front of me which I drank slowly. ‘What am I supposed to do?’ I whispered as I looked down at Matt since he was kneeling in front of me, he didn’t say anything but he grabbed my hands and ran his thumbs over them slowly

‘First of all, you're not gonna freak out. Second, were gonna help you through this, he won’t ever hurt you again’ Matt said softly, I nodded a little and just looked down into his eyes. He smiled then leaned up some and kissed my forehead then looked over at Brian ‘now, what do you think?’ he asked and I looked over at him also ‘why don’t you move in with me?’ he asked and I just kinda looked at him ‘but, are you sure?’ ‘Mhm, I've been meaning to ask you anyway’ ‘really?’ I asked and he nodded then leaned over and kissed me, I kissed back and smiled some ‘well, now I have to go to a relator and put the house up for sale’ I said and they nodded ‘we’ll let you guys do that and we’ll see you tomorrow to help you start moving things ok?’ Zack said and I nodded then stood up and hugged everyone, they all hugged back and hugged Brian and they left. I looked over at Brian and he smiled then pulled me to him by my hips so I wrapped my arms around his neck

‘Are you sure you don’t mind me moving in? We’ve only been together for four months’ ‘yeah but we’ve known each other for two years’ ‘true, can you stay with me tonight then?’ ‘Of course I can baby, but we really should go talk to someone, it’s already noon’ he said and I looked over at the clock on my tv and nodded ‘ok, why don’t we go to the woman that sold me the house? She was so nice’ ‘ok, you should probably call and see if she’s in’ Brian said and I nodded then pulled away and bent down to grab my phone and I looked through my contacts thankful that I had saved the number so I hit the button and called ‘hello how may I help you?’ ‘Hi I was wondering if Jamie was in today?’ ‘She sure is hold on’ the woman said then transferred me over and I grabbed Brian’s hand and walked back out to the porch to have a smoke ‘hello?’ ‘Hi Jamie, this is Echo I don’t know if you remember me’ ‘Oh my gosh of course I do, how are you?’ ‘I'm good, you?’ ‘Good also, what can I do for you?’

‘Well, I was wondering if I could come see you today, I really have to move quickly and I’d like you to handle the sales and things’ ‘oh yeah sure, I’ll be here until six’ ‘ok well I should be there in about an hour is that ok?’ ‘Oh yeah, I’ll see you then’ ‘great thanks, bye’ ‘bye’ she said happily and we both hung up and I looked over at Brian, ‘she said yes and we’ll meet her in an hour’ I said and he nodded then we finished up our smokes and walked back inside. I went into my room and grabbed my bag then I walked back into the living room and opened the side table drawer and pulled out a black folder ‘what's that?’ ‘It’s all the house stuff and the taxes I spent on it and everything else related to it’ ‘oh ok good’ he said and I nodded then grabbed my phone, smokes and lighter and put them in my bag, made sure I had my keys then we headed out and over to the restate office. We got there with about five minutes to spare so we just stood and talked until Jamie came out

‘Echo!’ she said happily, I smiled and we hugged some then I pulled away and back up ‘this is my boyfriend Brian’ ‘hello nice to meet you’ they both said and shook hands then she lead us back to her office. ‘Ok, now what's going on?’ she asked as we all sat down ‘well, he asked me to move in and I accepted so I gotta sell the house but I have to move in kinda quickly and since you got me moved in, in two weeks I figured you could get me moved out and someone else in just as fast’ I said and she smiled and nodded some then pulled out a pen and note pad ‘ok, do you have anything for me?’ ‘Oh yeah, this is everything to do with the house’ I said as I handed the folder over, she opened it and looked through it and nodded ‘how much do you want to sell it for?’ ‘How much did I buy it for?’ I asked and she looked me up in the computer real quick ‘the original price was 220,000 but we got you down to 210,000 because of the fireplace’ she said and I nodded ‘well, let’s try 210,000 then’

‘Alright awesome, when are you two moving in together?’ ‘Were gonna start moving my things in tomorrow so within the next few days and I might leave some furniture at the house or sell it, I haven't decided yet’ I said and she nodded a little then looked through the papers again ‘ok, I’ll start getting a description of the house together and you can take pictures then drop them off to me and I’ll put everything on the site and we’ll see what happens’ she said and I nodded then we all stood up, shook hands and Brian and I left to grab some dinner then we headed back to my house ‘ok so, what are you planning to sell?’ he asked once we walked in and I shrugged ‘you already have everything so I don’t need to bring anything’ ‘you could bring your bed or your couch’ ‘and put it where?’ ‘In the guest room, you can use it as a filming room’ ‘really?’ ‘Of course, and maybe you could sell or donate everything you don’t wanna bring’ he said and I nodded a little then looked around

‘Well, I guess I should start packing something’s up’ ‘want some help?’ ‘Sure’ I smiled, he smiled back then walked over to me and set his hands on my waist as I wrapped my arms around his neck and we kissed a few times then walked into my room so I could change into something comfy. ‘So uh, would you get to distracted if this is all I wore?’ I asked as I came out of the bathroom with my hair up and only a tank top and black and red cheeky shorts on ‘uh, I uh, yeah’ he said and I giggled a little and nodded ‘good’ I smirked then walked over to the door and headed to the basement. I heard Brian start running after me and he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder as he walked over to the couch in the basement ‘hey!’ I whined and smacked his butt ‘hey now’ he said then put me down on the couch and hovered over me, I smiled and tugged on his shirt and as he pulled his off I pulled mine off and we kinda ended up fucking for like two hours then we showered and went to bed getting nothing packed.

Notes

Echo's Outfit - http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=136228565