When I woke in the morning, I was disoriented. I didn't remember much of last night, or how I had gotten home but I did have a strange dream. I had a dream that Brian had stayed the night with me and that we had made out, but I was alone in my bed. Just then, the toilet flushed in my bathroom and Brian walked out, his hair sticking up almost like it was styled that way. I smiled, but was shocked to find that it wasn't a dream at all. Brian crawled back into bed and smiled.

“Good morning,”

I returned the greeting but kept staring at him.

“We made out last night, right?”

His face flushed and I saw disappointment flash through his eyes. “Yeah, you remembered?”

“Well, duh.” I smiled. “I was just making sure it wasn't just a dream.”

“You dream about me often?”

I rolled my eyes, but laughed anyways. I didn't understand where this sudden attraction for Brian came from, but I guess I was so blinded by my love for Matt and I didn't notice that I did in fact like Brian more than a friend. I snuggled into Brian's chest not really wanting to get up yet and liked the feeling of warmth his body gave me. I felt secure and... happy.

“I thought you didn't like me,” I noted, though he had been around me naked many times and didn't make any type of move or remark, I just shrugged it off as if he saw me the same way I thought I saw him. I felt him start to play with my hair before he answered, as if he was distracting himself.

“You were so in love with Matt, I didn't think you even noticed me that way.” he sighed. “I'm not rebound right now, am I?”

“Well, for one, Matt and I never dated and I'm trying to move on. I don't want to rush into anything, but I do like you Brian.”

“We'll go slow.” he murmured as he leaned down to kiss my forehead. I sighed contently and wrapped my arms around him. I didn't know what this made us, but I was excited to see where it was going to go.

Eventually we had to get out of my bed, and we decided on going to get some brunch. I still wasn't feeling well from last night, and Brian tended to my every need. I had seen this side of him before, but it had always surprised me how gentle and sweet he was to me. I held his hand throughout the car ride to a local cafe, and even inside as we sat across from each other.

We went back to Brian's house afterward and cuddled on his sofa. We watched random movies that were playing on daytime TV as we talked about everything. He held me, my back to his chest as he twirled my hair around his fingers while he hummed one of my favorite songs. My eyes had drifted closed, but I could still hear Brian as I was falling asleep.

When I woke up again, I was in Brian's bed alone. It was dark in the room, and I could tell from the window that it was also dark outside. I felt immensely better but now I had ruined whatever sleep I was hoping to get later. I had a dream about Matt, but I don't remember any details of it, thank God. I didn't want to think about my best friend like this anymore, I didn't want to love a married man. I sighed before throwing the covers off of my legs and walked into the kitchen, where Brian was sitting with his back to me.

I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around him, laughing a little when he jumped in my arms. I kissed the side of his neck, and he brought his hand up to rub mine soothingly. He scooted out the chair a little from the table and tapped his thigh, signaling me to come around and sit on him. I complied, looking down at the table to see him writing notes to a song.

“When this is finished, will you play it for me?”

“We'll see,” Smirking, he rubbed my back before bringing his arm around to continue writing.

We sat in comfortable silence as he wrote, and I wondered what life would have been like if I had realized my feelings for Brian, instead of obsessing over what I knew I could have never had. I would have been the one that had gotten married and been pregnant. I wouldn't of had to hide my feelings from him or suffer with depression that he didn't love me back. I wouldn't of had to worry about hurting anybody, but life isn't that simple.

Though I was slowly losing focus of my feelings for Matt, they were still there and I needed to make sure that I was completely over him before anything serious between Brian and I could happen. I sighed, laying my head down on his shoulder, thinking about how complicated my life has become.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

I closed my eyes and smiled. “Just thinking about what my life would be like if I had fallen for you instead of Matt.”

“Really?” he looked over at me, pushing my bangs from my eyes. I looked up at him and nodded. “What did you see?”

“I can't tell you,” I smirked. “yet.”

“I see how it is,” he stuck out his tongue before letting his fingers dance along my sides. He kept me secure in his arms as I wiggled around, trying to get away from him tickling me. I turned to him, laughing in the crook of his neck where my face was hiding, begging him to stop. Finally he did, and my laughter was slowly dying down, and it was in that moment when our eyes met that I saw my escape from Matt's clutches that he didn't even acknowledge he had on me.

Simultaneously, we leaned in towards each other, and chills ran down my spine when he placed his hand on my back. I had cupped his cheek in my hand before our lips barely touched, molding together perfectly. And then he pulled away, leaving me breathless from that peck.

I got up from his lap, grabbing his hand and leading us to the bedroom. I crawled in next to him, cuddling up in his side, and watched him watch me. It wasn't long before his eyes slowly closed and his breathing slowed to a deep even pace. I brushed some of his hair away from his face and smiled.