(Love) Contract

Brian’s POV

I felt so tired, I didn’t even know why. Okay, I haven’t slept that good the last night.
After Tara told me about her past and that sick bastard of ex-boyfriend, the thoughts were running around in my head the whole night.
Trying to find a way in getting rid of that fucker, but the only solutions was that I had to call and ask him what he wanted.
But the last time I picked up he just wanted to talk to Tara, which was a no-go from my side.

I was glad I could sleep and lie in the back of the bus, Tara sitting beside me, she must be tired as well.
I held her during the night, in hope she wouldn’t have too many thoughts about her past.
Sometimes the past can haunt you… especially during dreams.
But when I held her, she had breathed evenly and had been sleeping, just I couldn’t.
With closed eyes I let my hand wander over the side of the bed, trying to get a hold on Tara, but my hand wouldn’t reach her.

The humming of the driving bus was nearly getting me back to sleep but I wanted to feel the hot little body curled up next to me.
I was getting way too used to having her this close to me, but I couldn’t help it. It felt just so good.
I rolled to my side, and again let my hand slide over the bed, again not meeting anything.
Alright, this was weird.
I slowly opened my eyes and tried to blink away the sudden light, coming through the windows, the curtains not fully closed.
I looked to the side and found the bed empty, maybe she got hungry and wanted to eat something without waking me.
But on the other hand, I don’t think any of the guys had thought about doing some shopping for our trip back… would only be a few hours but… we could still make a stop at some burger restaurant.

I swung my legs out of the bed and stood up, I walked towards the door and opened it and peeked outside, trying to see where Tara was, but I couldn’t see her.
Alessia and Zack sat together with Johnny at the table, playing cards.
I looked to the left, finding Jimmy in his bunk and pulled the curtain aside.
“Hey.” I leaned down a little.
“Hey sleepyhead. You good?” He lifted an eyebrow at me and I frowned.
“Sure. I’m fine, needed to do some catching up on sleep. Where is Tara?” I asked and let my eyes wander around, no other bunks were occupied and the chair next to the driver was empty as well.
And someone else was missing… Matt.
“She is driving in the car.” Jimmy said and flipped through his magazine.
“What? What car?” I frowned my good mood vanishing in an instant.
“Berry’s car. They needed a co-driver.” Jimmy said again looking bored.
“Who is driving the car?” I got out between clenched teeth.
“Matt, who else? Or are you seeing him here. Since no one else wanted to drive along, she was the only option. I think they said something about talking… don’t know. Since I am not ‘Mr. Know it all’, or well I am but I am not ‘Mr. Interested in all’.” Jimmy finished and sometimes I hated that guy.
“What did they want to talk about?” I asked again, trying not sound too pissed.
“Hell, do I know. It’s your girlfriend, isn’t it? Maybe she wants to get to know your friends better?” Jimmy asked and lifted an eyebrow at me.
I shook my head not knowing how to continue this conversation any further. I walked to the back of the bus, looking outside the window, trying to see if there was Matt’s car somewhere behind us, but couldn’t make it out and punched the cupboard.
What was Matt up to now?
He was doing it again, and why was Tara agreeing to it?!

Matt’s POV

“Come on, Tara. Tell me what happened?” I asked again and she looked away. I put my hand on her cheek and willed her to look at me.
“Matt, it’s just complicated. I don’t know…” She shook her head and I let my hand fall away.
“Just tell me, did I say something to anger you, I mean we… it… felt so good when we were in the park, the kiss… what happened since then? I didn’t really talk to you afterwards.” I thought about that for a moment.
“Is it that? Did you think I lost interest?” I asked and she frowned.
“No, noo.. I didn’t think like that. It has not really anything to do with you and me… I mean…” She trailed off and I didn’t really know what to think now.

“Nothing to do with you and me, but with whom then?” I asked and while asking this questions I already knew the answer.
“Brian.” I said and Tara looked away.
“Right?” I pressed and she finally met my eyes.
“Yes, we spent a lot of time together, we shared some… information, Matt. I like him, I really do.”
“And everything you liked about me is gone?” I frowned.
“I didn’t say that, but there is something else, but I can’t talk to you about. I can’t betray his trust.” She said and I sighed.
“But what does it have to do with me? Did Brian say anything bad about me? So the attraction is still there?” I asked and grabbed her hand again, needed the contact now.
She sighed, looking at her small hand in mine, and I smiled at the way it looked.
“Damn, Matt… Why are you making this so hard on me?” She closed her eyes. “Sure, there is still attraction between us, I wouldn’t have slept with you if there wouldn’t be any of that. And yes, it has something to do with Brian… But I really can’t tell you what. You have to ask him yourself if you can’t come up with something by yourself.”

She pulled her hand away as if it was burned, and I missed the feeling of her touch.
“Can we continue to drive now?” She asked and her voice sounded strange, no emotion left.
“Wait, a moment. This… relationship between you and Brian. You still keep in mind that it’s all show. You and him, it’s a relationship based on a contract. Don’t hurt yourself, Tara. I mean it… Even if you and Brian are close… or getting closer, keep in mind, that this is based on a contract. I liked you before this whole thing started. I felt attracted to you the moment I saw you sitting at the job interview. I know this sounds mean, but Brian sees you as a necessary attachment for the moment. And I don’t want you to be hurt by him in the end, Tara. Keep that in mind. And if you need me, or need my help, I told you right from the start that I am there for you. I want to help you, if you want to hear it or not.” I said, maybe that was a low blow, but I didn’t want her to run into something, where she wouldn’t get out so easily.
She didn’t answer me, she just stared out the window and I sighed loudly.
We had been standing here for quite a while and we had to make up some miles, so I better start driving now.
Brian was already on a bad mood with me, and when he recognized that I was here with Tara he would be pissed as well. I didn’t know for which reason, exactly but he would be… Maybe just because I was taking away his favorite toy right now…
But for me Tara was more than that, she meant something to me, and I wanted her to see that maybe she shouldn’t be so concentrated on that… what if we should break everything up between them?
Would that solve any problems?

Notes

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