The Aviators

I’m still in shock. The world has turned upside down. I’m a slave. No one asks that question. Ever. Ever. Not of a slave. Not of a sub. But…Matt just did. And I don’t know how to respond. He’s still standing in front of me, an expectant look on his face, dimples showing. And, I’m just…speechless.

“Val?”

I blink, hard. “You…” I croak out. Then stop, rubbing the heels of my hands into my eyes. “You didn’t ask…me that?”

Matt’s brow furrows. “I did. Will you marry me?”

I swallow hard, a lump growing as I stare at him, not comprehending. “What?”

He sighs, tilting his head back for a moment. I can see the tension in his jaw as he pinches at the bridge of his nose.

“Val…” He meets my eyes, his own dark. “It’s a simple question.”

I chew on the inside of my cheek, thinking that has to be wrong. It can’t possibly be simple. Or perhaps, more accurate would be that the answer is a complex one. I don’t know how to respond because there is nothing for me to base it on. Sure, I love him…but I’m not used to normal relationships. I mean, I could try and look to my sister’s with Brian…but…you know. I really don’t know them well enough.

I look up at him. “Marry you?”

Matt nods. “Yeah. Y’know…be my wife.”

I frown. “Am I even allowed?”

Matt eyes me sharply. “I wouldn’t be asking you if that were not the case, Val.”

I tilt my head back, chewing on the inside of my cheek. “Why?”

Matt lets out a sound almost like a growl. I can tell he’s getting frustrated, but call me curious. I want to know why he would even go there. I repeat my question. He leans back from me, eyes narrowing.

“Why not?”

I shake my head. “I’m your slave, Matt…I can’t marry you.”

He groans, rubbing at his face. “Fuck, Val. You want me to tell you this straight?”

I actually glare at him. “Yeah. Why?”

He stands and starts to pace in front of me. “The twins found out that if I marry you I can legally free you.”

I blink, once, twice, three times. “What?” I can’t have heard him correctly. Not this time. The marriage question I’m getting used to now. But that. The ‘f’ word…free. No. There is no way he just came out with those words.

“No.” I swallow hard then turn away from him. “That can’t be true.” A silence falls between us as I try to process what he’s said, and Matt gives me the space. He gets up and waves his hand at me, a dismissive gesture. I barely notice as I’m so deep in my mind trying to piece together everything that’s just happened.

I jump slightly as Matt reappears for a moment and drops something on the bench in front of me. My journal. I peek up at him. He gives me a wry smile.

“Might help?”

I look down again thinking he’s probably right. Writing my thoughts out does always help. I give a small smile in thanks and open up to a fresh page. He hands me a pen then leaves the room again. I breathe deep then place pen to page.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Marriage. It’s not something I’d ever thought about, not surprisingly as a slave. I vaguely remember that married men could still own slaves. I think even my first master might’ve been engaged. Not that I ever met his fiancée. But, I could never have imagined that the question would be asked of me. Why would it even be considered an option?

Sure, Matt loved me, cared for me. But, enough to want to marry me? Maybe I’m not marrying material. Maybe he’d end up regretting it. I don’t know. I didn’t want to know. But, what would happen if I said no? Matt said he could…free me if I married him. Would that be the only reason to marry me then? Was it the right reason?

I couldn’t even fathom being free. What would that be like? Too many thoughts to try and gather together and make sense of. But, at the same time…it’s what I’d always wanted. To be my own woman. Not someone else’s. Though didn’t getting married make you your husband’s? Or was that some antiquated view that isn’t part of twenty-first century thinking?

Anyway…maybe I wanted to figure this out slowly, and not be so rushed. Maybe that was the real reason I was so hesitant to give Matt an answer? I mean…he’d owned me all of…three months? Something like that. Who asks someone to marry them after three months? Even if it is for a very good reason.

I can only imagine what my parents might think of that. Wait…why does what they think matter to me. Where did that thought even come from? I hadn’t even heard from them since Matt told my mother to leave. That still hurt. I think I actually miss them. My family. Maybe if I did say yes to Matt I could ask them to come. Would we even have an actual wedding, or would that be too risky?

I know Jimmy and the others would love that…maybe we could even have a double wedding, Matt and I, and Brian and Michelle. No. I couldn’t even picture that.

Michelle and Brian pushed back their engagement for my sake. But…maybe if I asked my sister? Damn it. I couldn’t do that. Could I?

I think of how far things have come in such a short space of time, and Matt’s question makes no sense. Why would he want to marry me? Why? Even if it’s the only way to free me. I mean…surely Rob and JD could find some other way? But, maybe it is the only way?

So, how should I answer? Should I say yes? No? Maybe?

I guess maybe I just needed to talk it over more. With Matt…maybe with Michelle? I could ask Matt to call her for me…yes; maybe that was a good idea…

I lift the pen and shake my hand just as Matt walks back into the kitchen. He has his phone in hand and looks at me.

“You want to talk to your sister?”

I stare at him. “You read my mind.” Yeah, I actually just said that.

He chuckles. “Figured she might be able to help you decide. After all she said yes to Brian…”

I duck my head down, feeling shy in his presence all of a sudden. Just the fact that he thought of what I was thinking makes me realise I don’t really need to call her. I already know what she’ll say.

“I don’t think I need to do that, Matt.”

Matt tilts his head. “No?”

I shake my head slowly then peek up at him again, smiling a little more. “Yes.”

He crosses his arms over his chest, eyes narrowing. “Yes?”

I sit up straighter. “Yes. I’ll marry you.”

Notes

And here's the update :D