I woke to hear a ruckus outside. Lots of loud laughter. I rolled on to my back and stretched out my sleepy limbs, bumping in to a warm lump beside me.

"shit!", I hissed, looking at the clock. 4 pm.

"Zack!", I threw my arm over slapping his back, causing him to jump awake.

I low growl rumbled beneath his pillow.

"babe we slept all day, the guys are probably fucking pissed.", I slipped off his bed to realize I was naked.

I slipped on my shorts and t-shirt and tied my hair up in a bun.

The guys were out back on the deck. I nervously slid the glass door open and leaned against the frame.

"hey I didn't know you were home.", Leah chimed, from the looks it seemed she was the only one happy to see me.

"uhh..yeah I fell back asleep.", I gave a shaky laugh.

Pissing off Avenged Sevenfold was not a good feeling.

"all day?", Matt snapped never looking at me.

"im sorry Matty.", my heart wrenched in my chest, and I was inwardly begging him to look at me.

But he didn't. He just nodded his head, downed his beer and cracked open another.

I turned on my heel and slid the door closed behind me, slamming it a little harder than I meant too.

"you need to go talk to them.", I announced as I stormed in to Zacks room. I found him bent over his dresser, straw to his nose.

"are you kidding? You're really doing this right now? Go talk to your band Zack. This can wait.", I shook my head.

"you're right Lexus, this can fucking wait.", he raged, tossing his straw on to the white line causing most of it to scatter and fall to the floor.

I was shocked at the way he lashed out, I turned away and stomped up to Matt's room.

I showered and got dressed. Peaking out Matt's bedroom window that over looked the yard, Zacky was seated next to Matt now, sharing a laugh.

I sighed before slipping on my favorite Megadeth hoodie and converse. Reaching in to my wallet I noticed my money I had earned from the tour was starting to run out. I grabbed a twenty and shoved it in to my pocket along with my phone.

I peaked through the back doors one last time before leaving through the front.

"A pint of E&J", I pointed to the bottle on the shelf at our local liquor store. It wasn't my intention to buy alcohol when I left the house, but this is where I ended up. I made my purchase and quickly decided to head for the beach.

Half the bottle gone and thoughts following through me like crazy. 'how could he forgive Zack so easily but not even glance in my direction.' I shook my head.

'it's not my fault he missed practice...is it? Is this about practice at all. Maybe he's still upset about the drugs. He probably thinks I was home with him doing that all day. Well he'd be right.', guilt pounded inside of me and I took another swig of the bottle.

'have I been neglecting Matt?', tears welled in my eyes and I chugged some more.

'i have!'

"oh Matty.", I whispered out, the tears finally falling.

I dug my fingers into the sand clenching a hand full. I looked up to see the storm clouds rolling in from the ocean, a light drizzle began to fall.

I pulled my hood over my head and pushed myself to my feet. Throwing the empty bottle into the garbage can placed mid-beach as I tred through the sand. The alcohol making it feel as if bricks were tied to my feet.

I didn't bother to dust off the sand before entering the house. I heard music, muffled, but still very loud coming from the basement.

"thanks for trying to find me assholes!", I worked so hard to stop crying and now tears were threatening to fall once again.

I stomped in to Zacks room to find it empty. I searched his draws in a rage, for something, anything to get high. I noticed the bottle from earlier and snagged half off that new pill. I didn't exactly like the high it gave me, but I knew that it calms me down and gives me a good sleep, and that's what I needed right now.

I stumbled in to the kitchen washing the pill down with some water.

"where are the poptarts?", I whined aloud from the floor after searching through the whole snack cabinet.

I heard crackling of plastic and peaked over the counter to see Jimmy biting in to one of the two smores poptarts in a pack. His chewing resembled something of a goat, and I couldn't help but laugh hysterically, sniffing back my tears, I propelled myself towards him squeezing him tight. I don't know why I did it, but it felt perfect right now.

"you're weird... So I guess that means the war is over. You're finally on my level of weirdness.", he hugged me back squeezing the air from my lungs. "That hug earned you the last poptart.", he handed me the snack and headed off. I shook my head, that man was out of his mind, in the most wonderful way.

With my heart slightly warmed I began to chew in to the snack. Leaning on the counter barely able to stand between the mix of alcohol and xanax.

Two familiar voices approached the kitchen, causing me force myself to stand straight.

"Hey where'd you go?", two arms wrapped around me, Zack placed a kiss on my neck.

"Out. But thanks for waiting until now to worry and try and figure that out.", I didn't respond warmly to his touch.

I seen guilt flash through Matt's eyes but it quickly melted and turned back in to the cold shoulder.

How long would he keep this up?

"so you're still mad?", I asked, having no problem prying at this in front of Zack.

He didn't answer.

"Mad at what? I should be the one that's mad, you made me waste some good blow.", Zack laughed, trying to defend me from Matt but failed miserably.

"I didn't make you waste shit, you overreacted and dropped it on ur own!", appauled, I shrugged free from his hold, stepping back to be able to stare at them both.

"I can't do this shit right now.", my voice cracked, and once again my inebriated emotions switched to 'crybaby.'

"Lexi-", Matt caught my arm before I could storm off, his voice sounded sweet, for the first time since this morning.

"Dont worry about me boys, I'm not leaving. Just going upstairs to sleep.", I looked between both of them, "oh wait, you wouldn't worry even if I did leave.", I laughed and pulled my arm from his hand.

I laid in Matt's bed and buried my face in my pillow letting out a therapeutic scream. I finally kicked off my shoes, filling the sheets with sand, to drunkenly exhausted to give a shit.

I thought I would fall right out but the thoughts came creeping back in.

'How could they let me leave with no fight? Party without me here?'

The tears fell and I began to sob, probably being too dramatic, but I couldn't control it.

I can't remember falling asleep.

Notes

Sorry. This one is a bit short...and random...and pretty much a filler, but I wanted to post it, I thought it was a good spot to end the chapter. Quality over quantity. Lol