Chasing Ducks
1/1
It seemed like just yesterday that he was still with us, even though nearly two years had passed. At first, I couldn't believe he was really gone. I didn't want to believe it. I refused to believe that my best friend was dead. But I had to accept it sooner or later.
Still, it was the hardest thing in the world for me to do. Even harder than when I had lost my parents.
I had moved to California some time ago to go to college and, by some string of luck, met the guys of Avenged Sevenfold. Five men I now call my best friends and brothers. Whenever I had time to spare, I would go out and hang with them. Throughout this time, I hadnt really heard much from my mom and dad. I soon found out, only a few days before my graduation, that they were victims of a tragic car accident. They didn't survive.
It was hard to handle. The two people who had raised me from birth were dead... they never even got to see me graduate college.
Matt, Brian, Zacky, Johnny, and Jimmy became my rocks since then; they were always there for me. Jimmy especially. He'd been the closest to me for as long as I could remember. There was never a time where I didn't smile or laugh around him. His actions, his personality, his sense of humor... everything about him, pretty much. No matter how sad or depressed I might be, he could always cheer me up. Slowly but surely, I came to call him the brother I'd never had.
But then, almost like in the blink of an eye, he was gone.
My honorary brother was gone.
---
As of now, it was December 28th, 2011. The two-year anniversary of my best friend's unfortunate, untimely, and undeserving death.
I slowly pulled my motorcycle over to the side of the road, parking alongside the curb and walking towards the gates of the cemetery where he was buried. I had done this only once, not counting the ceremony two years ago. I told myself that I should be used to this feeling by now, but it never went away.
When I reached the now all-too-familiar dark grey tombstone, I let out a long, heavy sigh, trying not to cry as I felt the tears start to form in the corners of my eyes. Fidgeting some, I pulled down the hem of my skull and crossbones tank top, revealing one of the tattoos I had gotten around the time of his death- it read "foREVer" in black cursive lettering, surrounded by a purplish-blue glow outline, curved an inch or two below my neckline. There were others, too; I had "Fiction" in red letters, just like what he had, only horizontal, on my lower back, and a Rev Death-Bat covering my upper back. I had also gotten a labret piercing, just like his.
I let out another sniffle, wiping my eyes and being extra careful not to smudge my eyeliner.
"I miss you, Jimmy," I whispered, running my fingers through my shoulder-length, choppy layered, purple-streaked jet black hair. "I know I've said that so many times, but I really do." I let my eyes wander to my converse-covered feet that stood in the damp grass. "It's been so different without you..."
At that instant, the memories came flooding back to me like they had just happened yesterday. One in particular- my personal favorite...
---
It was a warm, summer day in 2005, and the guys of Avenged Sevenfold were taking a break from recording their City of Evil album. They had decided to drag me along with them, for reasons I didn't know, but really didn't care. Being with them at any time was a treat for me.
The six of us were walking through a clearer part of the forest in a nearby park; Zacky and Brian had taken each of my hands in theirs and were skipping along the dirt path with me, the three of us laughing like little kids and just having fun. Matt had taken to walking some distance behind us while Jimmy and Johnny were slightly ahead, looking for anything interesting to do. Then, as if answering their prayers, Johnny pointed over toward a lake we were approaching.
"Dude, look at the size of that fucking duck!" he shouted, causing the rest of us to look in that direction. "Look at that duck! Jesus Christ!" There were indeed several ducks swimming in the lake, but the one he pointed to in particular was not even a duck at all.
"Johnny, you dumbass, that's not a duck!" I laughed, rolling my eyes. "It's a goose!"
But Jimmy obviously didn't hear what I had said, as he took off running towards it. "C'mere, fucking... Stallion Duck!"
I had to fight the urge to give myself a face palm. "Ugh, it;s not a fucking duck!" I tried to explain again.
But Jimmy had none of it, already halfway to the lake as he kept on repeating, "He's not afraid at all!" through countless bouts of cheerful laughter. Of course, the closer he got, the more the duck/goose tried to run away. Eventually, when Jimmy reached the water, it flew off. A huge smile was painted on his face as he started walking back by us, only to look back at the disappearing birds and laugh again. "That's the biggest fucking duck I've ever seen in my entire life," he grinned.
I leaned forward as best as I could while still holding the hands of the two guitarists and kicked him in the leg. "God dammit Jimmy, it wasnt a duck!" I blurted through fits of giggles.
He ruffled my hair playfully in response. "Aw, c'mon, Elise. You need to have an open mind about this kinda stuff. I say it's a duck, so I will now call it a duck." he chuckled.
I shook my head, smiling. "I swear, sometimes I dont understand you, Jimmy." I laughed. Flashing that sly grin at me, he picked me up and tossed me over his shoulder, walking off.
"Put me down!" I had constantly yelled at him, though not doing anything about it. He just laughed, and soon, I couldn't help but join in.
The very next day, right at sunrise, my doorbell rang. Groggily, I nearly tripped over my feet as I opened the door of my house to find a tall, smiling drummer staring me right in the face.
"Jimmy, what the hell? It's five in the morning," I groaned, my eyes still attempting to adjust to the sudden light of the outside.
Without any invitation, he ushered his way into the house and lightly began to push me towards my room. "No time, just change! Quick! "he ordered. Knowing it was pointless to argue with my hyper best friend, I put on a sweater and some blue jean shorts before slipping on my shoes and meeting him back at the front door. Immediately, he grabbed me by the hand and started running down the sidewalk towards the park we were at yesterday.
"Whats going on? Where are we going?" I kept asking him, trying to keep up with him as he dragged me along. Eventually he answered my question, that same huge, toothy grin on his face.
"Ducks, Elise! Theyre everywhere!" he told me, his eyes lighting up like he was a child in a candy store.
Oh great, I thought. Is this going to be like the same thing that happened yesterday? And were they actually ducks this time?
One could only wonder what went through the mind of the man commonly called The Rev.
When we had reached the lake at the clearing of the forest, our eyes settled on the numerous birds waddling around on land and swimming in the water. And, just as I had suspected from the beginning, they were not ducks, but geese.
"Jimmy, how many times do I have to say it? Those. Are. Not. Ducks!" I tried to hold back my obvious laughter as I stared at him, watching his eyes twinkle with childlike excitement.
"Yeah, so?" he answered, his cheeky grin forcing me to let a chuckle escape. Soon, he released my hand and started to slowly approach one of the ducks/geese.
"Please don't tell me you're going to try and catch one of them," I quipped, my hands in the air before they flopped back down to my sides.
He tilted his head to one side in a teasing manner. "Not catch, just chase." he replied.
I folded my arms across my chest, sighing. "Honestly, sometimes you act like such a kid." I told him, rolling my eyes again. "Sometimes I find it hard to believe you're older than me."
He smiled in my direction, ruffling my hair again just like yesterday. "Only by three years, darlin'." he replied, as if to remind me of the obvious.
All of a sudden, he took off running towards the ducks/geese, shouting random funny nonsense as they all started running and flying away. I simply stood there, waiting for him to finish. Though I had a feeling that wasn't going to happen anytime soon.
"C'mon, Elise!" he called out to me, "Just try it, it's fun!"
Personally, I had never tried chasing a bird before, but had watched countless little kids chase seagulls at the amusement parks. It did seem like fun... why not?
As tired as I still was, I found myself running towards a duck/goose and chasing it. It didn't take long before I was laughing up a storm. This was fun! It was good, simple amusement.
Jimmy started chasing after me until the bird flew away, then he snaked his arms around my waist and lifted me up off the ground. "Haha! I caught one!" he laughed.
I squirmed in his hold, though happy to be in the arms of my best friend. "Dammit Jimmy, put me down!" I giggled, kicking my legs in an attempt to free myself.
He played along, laughing some more. "Hell no! You're mine now, Stallion Duck!" With that, he started walking around the field with me still wiggling around. This continued for a while until he finally set me back down on the ground.
"You are such a fucking goofball!" I playfully punched him in the arm, which caused him to fake it hurting.
He smiled down at me. "Yeah, but you love me anyway." he chuckled. I nodded, returning his smile with one of my own.
"That I do," I said with a giggle. He then lifted me off the ground again, only to place me on his back, my arms wrapping around his neck as he started walking back toward the playground. Resting my head on his shoulder, I asked him, "We'll be best friends forever, right Jimmy?"
Like always, he flashed me that famous grin, turning his head to plant a soft, quick kiss on my nose. "Best friends forever, Elise."
---
I bent down to my knees and placed the small bouquet of roses on the foot of the gravestone, smiling sadly as I traced the lettering of his name on the marble.
"Even in death, you kept your promise, Jimmy." I whispered. "I just wish forever could've been longer."
Before I could continue, I heard a honk and turned to face the direction of the noise.
There, standing not even two feet away from me, was a goose.
A very familiar goose.
The same one Jimmy and I used to chase.
Surprisingly, it waddled closer to me, dark eyes twinkling curiously.
Why was that twinkle so familiar as well...?
The goose let out another honk, and, yet again, came closer to me. Strange indeed. Still, it allowed me to smile. The memory of constantly chasing that goose was the favorite pastime that Jimmy and I had.
Once the goose was only a few inches away from me, I stood up, staring at the gravestone, then turning to face the bird. Back to the stone. Then back to the bird.
I smiled a smile that mimicked The Rev's.
"C'mere, you fucking Stallion Duck." I spoke with a laugh, taking off after the bird. Just like always, it started running away. During that time, I could almost hear the all-too familiar voice of Jimmy shouting, "He's not afraid at all!" in my head. Just like the first time he did this. I chased it for a few minutes, watching it run before it eventually took off into the sky. I smiled as I watched the bird fly away before turning back to the gravestone.
"Jimmy, for some odd reason... it feels as though you've never really left me at all."
---
Still, it was the hardest thing in the world for me to do. Even harder than when I had lost my parents.
I had moved to California some time ago to go to college and, by some string of luck, met the guys of Avenged Sevenfold. Five men I now call my best friends and brothers. Whenever I had time to spare, I would go out and hang with them. Throughout this time, I hadnt really heard much from my mom and dad. I soon found out, only a few days before my graduation, that they were victims of a tragic car accident. They didn't survive.
It was hard to handle. The two people who had raised me from birth were dead... they never even got to see me graduate college.
Matt, Brian, Zacky, Johnny, and Jimmy became my rocks since then; they were always there for me. Jimmy especially. He'd been the closest to me for as long as I could remember. There was never a time where I didn't smile or laugh around him. His actions, his personality, his sense of humor... everything about him, pretty much. No matter how sad or depressed I might be, he could always cheer me up. Slowly but surely, I came to call him the brother I'd never had.
But then, almost like in the blink of an eye, he was gone.
My honorary brother was gone.
---
As of now, it was December 28th, 2011. The two-year anniversary of my best friend's unfortunate, untimely, and undeserving death.
I slowly pulled my motorcycle over to the side of the road, parking alongside the curb and walking towards the gates of the cemetery where he was buried. I had done this only once, not counting the ceremony two years ago. I told myself that I should be used to this feeling by now, but it never went away.
When I reached the now all-too-familiar dark grey tombstone, I let out a long, heavy sigh, trying not to cry as I felt the tears start to form in the corners of my eyes. Fidgeting some, I pulled down the hem of my skull and crossbones tank top, revealing one of the tattoos I had gotten around the time of his death- it read "foREVer" in black cursive lettering, surrounded by a purplish-blue glow outline, curved an inch or two below my neckline. There were others, too; I had "Fiction" in red letters, just like what he had, only horizontal, on my lower back, and a Rev Death-Bat covering my upper back. I had also gotten a labret piercing, just like his.
I let out another sniffle, wiping my eyes and being extra careful not to smudge my eyeliner.
"I miss you, Jimmy," I whispered, running my fingers through my shoulder-length, choppy layered, purple-streaked jet black hair. "I know I've said that so many times, but I really do." I let my eyes wander to my converse-covered feet that stood in the damp grass. "It's been so different without you..."
At that instant, the memories came flooding back to me like they had just happened yesterday. One in particular- my personal favorite...
---
It was a warm, summer day in 2005, and the guys of Avenged Sevenfold were taking a break from recording their City of Evil album. They had decided to drag me along with them, for reasons I didn't know, but really didn't care. Being with them at any time was a treat for me.
The six of us were walking through a clearer part of the forest in a nearby park; Zacky and Brian had taken each of my hands in theirs and were skipping along the dirt path with me, the three of us laughing like little kids and just having fun. Matt had taken to walking some distance behind us while Jimmy and Johnny were slightly ahead, looking for anything interesting to do. Then, as if answering their prayers, Johnny pointed over toward a lake we were approaching.
"Dude, look at the size of that fucking duck!" he shouted, causing the rest of us to look in that direction. "Look at that duck! Jesus Christ!" There were indeed several ducks swimming in the lake, but the one he pointed to in particular was not even a duck at all.
"Johnny, you dumbass, that's not a duck!" I laughed, rolling my eyes. "It's a goose!"
But Jimmy obviously didn't hear what I had said, as he took off running towards it. "C'mere, fucking... Stallion Duck!"
I had to fight the urge to give myself a face palm. "Ugh, it;s not a fucking duck!" I tried to explain again.
But Jimmy had none of it, already halfway to the lake as he kept on repeating, "He's not afraid at all!" through countless bouts of cheerful laughter. Of course, the closer he got, the more the duck/goose tried to run away. Eventually, when Jimmy reached the water, it flew off. A huge smile was painted on his face as he started walking back by us, only to look back at the disappearing birds and laugh again. "That's the biggest fucking duck I've ever seen in my entire life," he grinned.
I leaned forward as best as I could while still holding the hands of the two guitarists and kicked him in the leg. "God dammit Jimmy, it wasnt a duck!" I blurted through fits of giggles.
He ruffled my hair playfully in response. "Aw, c'mon, Elise. You need to have an open mind about this kinda stuff. I say it's a duck, so I will now call it a duck." he chuckled.
I shook my head, smiling. "I swear, sometimes I dont understand you, Jimmy." I laughed. Flashing that sly grin at me, he picked me up and tossed me over his shoulder, walking off.
"Put me down!" I had constantly yelled at him, though not doing anything about it. He just laughed, and soon, I couldn't help but join in.
The very next day, right at sunrise, my doorbell rang. Groggily, I nearly tripped over my feet as I opened the door of my house to find a tall, smiling drummer staring me right in the face.
"Jimmy, what the hell? It's five in the morning," I groaned, my eyes still attempting to adjust to the sudden light of the outside.
Without any invitation, he ushered his way into the house and lightly began to push me towards my room. "No time, just change! Quick! "he ordered. Knowing it was pointless to argue with my hyper best friend, I put on a sweater and some blue jean shorts before slipping on my shoes and meeting him back at the front door. Immediately, he grabbed me by the hand and started running down the sidewalk towards the park we were at yesterday.
"Whats going on? Where are we going?" I kept asking him, trying to keep up with him as he dragged me along. Eventually he answered my question, that same huge, toothy grin on his face.
"Ducks, Elise! Theyre everywhere!" he told me, his eyes lighting up like he was a child in a candy store.
Oh great, I thought. Is this going to be like the same thing that happened yesterday? And were they actually ducks this time?
One could only wonder what went through the mind of the man commonly called The Rev.
When we had reached the lake at the clearing of the forest, our eyes settled on the numerous birds waddling around on land and swimming in the water. And, just as I had suspected from the beginning, they were not ducks, but geese.
"Jimmy, how many times do I have to say it? Those. Are. Not. Ducks!" I tried to hold back my obvious laughter as I stared at him, watching his eyes twinkle with childlike excitement.
"Yeah, so?" he answered, his cheeky grin forcing me to let a chuckle escape. Soon, he released my hand and started to slowly approach one of the ducks/geese.
"Please don't tell me you're going to try and catch one of them," I quipped, my hands in the air before they flopped back down to my sides.
He tilted his head to one side in a teasing manner. "Not catch, just chase." he replied.
I folded my arms across my chest, sighing. "Honestly, sometimes you act like such a kid." I told him, rolling my eyes again. "Sometimes I find it hard to believe you're older than me."
He smiled in my direction, ruffling my hair again just like yesterday. "Only by three years, darlin'." he replied, as if to remind me of the obvious.
All of a sudden, he took off running towards the ducks/geese, shouting random funny nonsense as they all started running and flying away. I simply stood there, waiting for him to finish. Though I had a feeling that wasn't going to happen anytime soon.
"C'mon, Elise!" he called out to me, "Just try it, it's fun!"
Personally, I had never tried chasing a bird before, but had watched countless little kids chase seagulls at the amusement parks. It did seem like fun... why not?
As tired as I still was, I found myself running towards a duck/goose and chasing it. It didn't take long before I was laughing up a storm. This was fun! It was good, simple amusement.
Jimmy started chasing after me until the bird flew away, then he snaked his arms around my waist and lifted me up off the ground. "Haha! I caught one!" he laughed.
I squirmed in his hold, though happy to be in the arms of my best friend. "Dammit Jimmy, put me down!" I giggled, kicking my legs in an attempt to free myself.
He played along, laughing some more. "Hell no! You're mine now, Stallion Duck!" With that, he started walking around the field with me still wiggling around. This continued for a while until he finally set me back down on the ground.
"You are such a fucking goofball!" I playfully punched him in the arm, which caused him to fake it hurting.
He smiled down at me. "Yeah, but you love me anyway." he chuckled. I nodded, returning his smile with one of my own.
"That I do," I said with a giggle. He then lifted me off the ground again, only to place me on his back, my arms wrapping around his neck as he started walking back toward the playground. Resting my head on his shoulder, I asked him, "We'll be best friends forever, right Jimmy?"
Like always, he flashed me that famous grin, turning his head to plant a soft, quick kiss on my nose. "Best friends forever, Elise."
---
I bent down to my knees and placed the small bouquet of roses on the foot of the gravestone, smiling sadly as I traced the lettering of his name on the marble.
"Even in death, you kept your promise, Jimmy." I whispered. "I just wish forever could've been longer."
Before I could continue, I heard a honk and turned to face the direction of the noise.
There, standing not even two feet away from me, was a goose.
A very familiar goose.
The same one Jimmy and I used to chase.
Surprisingly, it waddled closer to me, dark eyes twinkling curiously.
Why was that twinkle so familiar as well...?
The goose let out another honk, and, yet again, came closer to me. Strange indeed. Still, it allowed me to smile. The memory of constantly chasing that goose was the favorite pastime that Jimmy and I had.
Once the goose was only a few inches away from me, I stood up, staring at the gravestone, then turning to face the bird. Back to the stone. Then back to the bird.
I smiled a smile that mimicked The Rev's.
"C'mere, you fucking Stallion Duck." I spoke with a laugh, taking off after the bird. Just like always, it started running away. During that time, I could almost hear the all-too familiar voice of Jimmy shouting, "He's not afraid at all!" in my head. Just like the first time he did this. I chased it for a few minutes, watching it run before it eventually took off into the sky. I smiled as I watched the bird fly away before turning back to the gravestone.
"Jimmy, for some odd reason... it feels as though you've never really left me at all."
---
Notes
Probably my best work Avenged Sevenfold-wise... along with it being my only one.I might write more stuff in the future, so look for that.
Read, rate, comment, all that jazz. c:
3/10/13