Sometimes Our Saints Are Sinners (TVH sequel)

I don’t know why I was doing this. I really don’t. All I know is that I am an idiot, an absolute imbecile. But that realization didn’t stop me from caressing Matt’s face while he was sleeping.
I hadn’t meant to start the guilty pleasure, but I have learned recently that I have about seven percent control over my own mind. I had come into his room a few days ago to wake him up, but first I just kind of stared at him. He was so peaceful in his sleep; his face wasn’t lined with emotion and stress. In his sleep he just seemed so, so normal. Matt’s been acting really introverted since he’s gotten here, and I can’t help but think that it’s my entire fault. So once my eyes rested on the Matt that I remembered, my subconscious had taken over and before I knew what was happening, my hand was cupping Matt’s cheek and I was inches from his face. In his sleep, when I touch him, his lips twitch as though he’s smiling, and that’s what had me coming back the next morning, caressing his face for a good three minutes before pulling the door open dramatically and pretending as though I had just valiantly came in to wake him up.
For some reason though, my mind never considered the fact that one day Matt might actually wake up whilst my hand was still on his face. Unfortunately that day was today. I was sitting on my knees in front of his face, timing my breaths with his. I watched him carefully as I let my thumb glide along the roughness of his scruff that had grown on his face, wishing to see those beautiful hazel eyes. I knew I’d have to wait for a while and that even then it wouldn’t be enough, but I wasn’t careful with what I wished for. As I began to sit up I let my hand start sliding off his face, but it didn’t leave. Instead, it was covered by something warm: Matt’s hand. I shot back down onto the balls of my feet and looked to see two stunning balls of hazel staring right at me. I couldn’t breathe.
Matt continued to look at me, his eyes large, like a young child who is looking up towards their mother in curiosity. His hand still laid on mine, but he squeezed a little bit, ushering me to continue caressing his face. Once my thumb began to move in its slow pattern, Matt’s eyes rolled shut and a deep sigh came out of his nose. He enjoyed it. I sat there for a good five minutes, just stroking his cheek and watching his reactions. He seemed comfortable, and calm and… happy. At that thought, I let my hand fall. I didn’t want to lead him on, if that was what this was. Once my hand left Matt’s face, his eyes shot to mine, a look of disappointment clouding his eyes. I frowned at him and he sighed.
“Good morning.” He whispered tiredly. I glanced back to him and gave a weak smile.
“Good morning.” I answered. He stretched himself out like a cat would before plopping himself down back into his bed.
“Do I have to get up?” Matt whined. I smiled at him, catching on to his playful manner.
“If I got up, you have to get up.” I scolded jokingly. He grinned cheekily.
“Well, I mean, if you want you could just lay back down. I can make space.” Matt winked. I giggled childishly and pushed his chest. Ugh, his chest.
“Nice try, Matt.” I sighed, rolling my eyes at him. He shrugged.
“Can’t blame a guy for trying.” He said simply. I let out a deep breath.
“Well you can, it’d just be a dick move.” We both laughed before the room went silent. I didn’t know what was he was thinking, but all I was thinking was that I am stupid and I deserve all the bad things to happen to me.
“… So, do you know what we’re doing today?” Matt asked, sitting up in his bed. I shrugged and looked around.
“Not sure, no one else is up yet, I don’t think.” I stood up and walked over to Brian and Zach’s bedroom to see if they were sleeping. I walked in on an empty room. I did a double take, but the bed was still lacking two guitarists. I ran over to Jimmy and Johnny’s room to find it also barren. “Or… they’re gone.”
“They’re what?” I turned around and saw Matt standing behind me in only a loose fitting pair of sweats.
“Oh come on.” I muttered to myself. Matt tilted his head, a smirk beginning to cross his face. “I said they’re gone. They’re not in their rooms.”
“Maybe they’re already outside?” Matt suggested. I thought it over for a minute before I shrugged.
“Okay, let’s go check the pool.” I announced as I began moving to the stairs.
“So hey, what was it that you said just a minute ago?” Matt asked.
“Wha--?” I hummed, turning my head.
“You said something just a minute ago.” Matt informed me, a shit eating grin crossing his face.
“Yeah… I said the guys are gone…?” I replied, furrowing my brow. He shook his head.
“No, no. You said something before that.” Matt insisted. I was so confused by Matt’s demeanor that I almost ran into the back door but just barely caught myself before it happened. I ripped the door open, the cool breeze feeling good against my bare legs.
“Mm no I’m pretty sure I didn’t.” I scoffed, realizing that he had heard my comment about his overall appearance, which was unbearable to look at.
“Mm yeah I’m pretty sure you did.” Matt snickered as he followed closely behind me up to the pool deck. The pool was also empty, which was peculiar. I immediately turned towards the shop, hoping to find them shooting some pool.
“You’re hearing things.” I waved as I headed for the door.
“And you’re seeing things apparently.” Matt giggled. I stopped in my spot and pursed my lips. Matt ran into me and my lip quivered. He noticed the look on my face and tilted his head innocently. “What?” He pouted and I looked at him through my lashes.
“…. Shut up.” Matt let out a loud melodic laugh and I continued up to the door of the shop. I stopped short when I saw a little note written in red pen.
Went into town with Dad and Tammy. Be back soon. :) – Zach and friends
“And yet they left us here.” I sighed, my brow furrowing. I turned to Matt, who looked like a Greek God in the sunlight. I was falling over his golden, tattooed shoulders and made his stomach looked much more toned. It also lit up his love lines, which was my absolute biggest weak spot when it came to a guy’s appearance.
“Wait, so they went into town without inviting us?” Matt repeated with his hazel eyes lit up like fireworks from the bright summer sun. I nodded, forcing myself to look at his face and his face only.
“I guess.” I mumbled, slowly becoming blinded by the two very hot things right in front of me. Are you an idiot? I thought to myself. Have some self control, woman. Are you really going to lose your panties from a guy that totally screwed you over? I looked up at my forehead as though I were looking at my conscience before turning my attention back to Matt.
“So what should we do?” Matt asked. He began stretching himself out, which made his muscles much tighter and made his already low riding sweats fall even lower on his hips. The answer is yes, I’m going to lose my panties.
“… Can you, like, for once stop being incredibly attractive? It’s very distracting.” I said bluntly as I turned the other way. I could literally hear Matt smile like a child on Christmas morning, but I chose to ignore it and instead find something to preoccupy myself with before I jumped him. Which I did not want to do….
“You want me to change?” Matt gasped. I sighed, my wall beginning to form in my head. I looked down at the floor and saw Matt’s shadow, which told me that we was flexing.
“I know that you’re flexing just to spite me, you dick.” I hissed as I let my arms cross over my chest. Matt giggled behind me and pulled me into a hug by my waist, which caused me to tense up immediately at his touch. He was so warm, it was almost suffocating.
“Okay, well what should we do?” Matt breathed into my ear. I stiffened and squeezed my eyes tightly shut. I didn’t want to seem like I was bipolar with Matt, but I didn’t want to get sucked back in to my old ways. It didn’t work last time and it probably wouldn’t work this time.
“We could…. Oh! We could bring up my new chair to my apartment.” I suggested as I gingerly stepped out of Matt’s hold. I turned towards him and his tilted his head. “I bought a new seat for my living room and it just got in last night. I was going to have you and Bri take it up for me today but…”
“Okay, that sounds cool.” Matt nodded, a kind smile covering his face. I smiled in return and went down towards the house, my focus on the garage that was attached to the home. I pulled open the cream colored door and pressed the button to open the garage door before going over to the neatly package piece of furniture that was waiting for me. “Is that even going to fit in your living room?”
“Well, I was gonna move my bookcase into my bedroom and then move the TV into the corner so I could sit it right next to the couch.” I explained, moving my hands along as I spoke. Matt’s eyebrows rose and I sighed. “It’s gonna be a tight fit, but it was cheap and I hate having to sit on Zach’s or Brian’s bony ass knees.” Matt chuckled before going over to the chair and pulling off the plastic wrap. Once it was free of the cocoon I went over to one side of the chair to pick it up, but was stopped by Matt’s hand.
“No, no. I got it.” Matt offered. I scoffed and leaned my weight to one side.
“What, because I’m a woman you don’t want me to help?” I challenged. Matt rolled his eyes at me.
“No. I’m just being chivalrous. This chair weighs less than what I bench, Kid. I think I can handle it.” Matt insisted. I raised my eyebrows at him and he groaned. “Fine. You’d get in the way if you tried to help me. There, I said it. You happy now?”
“Satisfied. Ass.” I stuck my tongue out at him and he chuckled before tossing the cushion towards me.
“There, you can carry that.” Matt said. I growled at him and he winked, which sent me out the garage door and towards the stairs to my patio. I heard a loud huff behind me and smirked as I watched from my peripheral vision an image of Matt practically crab walking to keep the chair upright.
“Oh yeah, you totally got this.” I retorted as I happily bounded up the stairs. I heard a breathless scoff come from behind me but chose to ignore as I propped the door open with the large black cushion. I then returned to my patio to watch as Matt very carefully took each step to the staircase.
“It’s like carrying a drunken woman.” Matt called. I tried not to smile but I failed epically, and my rare crooked smile showed up on my face. Once he had gotten to the top of the stairs he peered at me over the chair and grinned at me. “That’s a cute mouth you got there, missy.”
“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” I sneered, breaking my mouth from its crookedness. Matt stuck his tongue out at me and I flipped him off before he entered my home with the greatest of care. He gingerly sat the chair in the middle of the room and huffed, out of breath from the long journey. “Okay, let’s go make some space in my room to move my bookcase.” He nodded and we both entered my small bedroom, which barely had enough space to hold a bed, nonetheless a bookcase too. Matt took one side and I took the other, both of us moving random things around to see if we could fit the shelves in the space we had created. It was comfortably silent, but I could hear his low breaths as he shuffled through things.
“You still have this?” I turned to see what Matt was holding, and my eyes rested on the locket that he had given me while we were in San Diego together. The one where he told me he loved me, and the one that burned my skin as I walked out of his house after he had chosen Gayle. I swallowed hard.
“Y-yeah, of course.” I answered, clearing my throat a bit. I went over to him and slid it out of his hands, slowly turning the gorgeous silver necklace in my palms. “I keep all of my jewelry that was given to me.”
“Why?” Matt asked incredulously. I peered up at him through my lashes.
“Did you want this back?” His silence answered my question for him. “Exactly. And I mean, why shouldn’t I keep something given to me? It’s proof that I had a special relationship with someone. I still have the locket Sam had given me, along with the seventeen other necklaces he gave me since he sucked at giving gifts.” That made Matt laugh, although the look of sorrow on his face prevented him from actually enjoying my commentary. “Want to see it?”
“Sure.” He whispered. I went over to the jewelry box where he had gotten my locket and rummaged through the thousands of necklaces. Great, just like my grandma, I thought to myself. I pulled out a secret compartment on the side of it and, lo and behold, the locket was in there. I picked it up by the chain and dropped it into Matt’s cupped hands, my eyes watching his face closely. He turned it over in his hands like I had done with his locket before smiling a little. “You’re right, it’s not as high class as the one I gave you.”
“Yeah, Sam was kind of cheap. But it was a beautiful gesture, nonetheless.” I shrugged, leaning against my dresser. “Like the one you gave me.” Matt sighed. I took the locket from his hands and put it back in the compartment along with the one he gave me. I shut the drawer and looked back to Matt, who was chewing on his lip. I scratched the back of my head and punched him in the shoulder lightly. “Let’s go move that bookcase, and then we can watch some movies. You pick this time.”
“Okay,” Matt said, forcing a smile on his face. He turned away from me and went to the living room, leaving me with my own thoughts. All I do is hurt him.

Notes