Welcome to the Family

As we approached the campfire, I could see that there were many people standing around just drinking and having conversations. I was not much of a social person, so seeing many people acting all crazy was weird to me, except for when it came to Bert and our friends. I did have friends who were like that. They liked to drink and have a good time, but I was the complete opposite. Maybe I needed people like that in my life because I did not have that characteristic, that and because the life I have had to live gave me the need to have fun and laughter.

We found an empty spot to sit on a wooden bench close to the fire. I looked at Cody when I realized the fireworks have not started yet.

“I thought you said they had already started.” I said, trying to talk over all of the shouting and laughing.

He chuckled, avoiding my gaze and looked into the fire. “Well I knew if I told you they hadn't then you would reconsider not coming instead of just tagging along,”

I growled under my breath and impatiently waited for the show to begin. He was right though. If I had time to think about it, I would have decided to stay on the bus to catch some sleep for tomorrow. I just wanted things to go smoothly and not screw up.

The music that played in the background of everyone had been put on pause and someone started to speak. “Alright everyone, it's almost time for the show to begin, but first I would like to introduce you all to our opening act for the night, Paramore. Paramore is a band from a small town in Franklin, Tennessee. This is their first year here, so give them a big round of applause.” A man had said, walking off a small stage that had been set up for a performance.

After the man stepped down, a young red headed girl and three boys stepped onto the stage and took their places with instruments in their hands. The girl stepped up to the microphone and started to speak.

“Hi, my name is Hayley Williams and I'm 17 years old and this is my band Paramore. This is Josh Farro lead guitarist and he is 18,” She said, pointing to her right at a guy close to her age, then at the drummer and last the guy to her left. “His younger brother Zac, the drummer and is the youngest of our band at 15. Then over here is Jeremy Davis and he is our bass player at age 20.”

Cody leaned in to say something. “Wow, the drummer’s only 15.”

“This is our second year as a band and our first year on tour.” She continued. “Okay, so we are going to start off by playing a song on our newly release album, All We Know is Falling. This is a song called Pressure.”

They started to play the song, starting with a smooth guitar riff, followed by the rest of the instruments, and then it softens and glides into the singing. They were good for first timers, but I knew that they were going to be competition for us. I was not a very competitive person, but this was my biggest dream and I did not want anyone to take it away from me.

From there they played the songs Emergency, and Here We Here Go Again. The last song I particularly liked. It was a song called Conspiracy. It started with a soft guitar, then everything but the singing comes in for a second, the drums halted it to a stop for a second, and then in came the singing and then the soft guitar again. As I took in the lyrics, I really started liking them. I liked their sound and just their music in general. Maybe our bands could become friends and tour America together. On the other hand, maybe we would be sworn enemies. I really hope not.

After they had finished, they were given a good turnout of applause and people liking them. Before they left, the singer Hayley mentioned they would also be performing tomorrow at 3:30.

I looked at Blake and the rest of the guys. They returned the look, mirroring the concern in their eyes. I was sure they just as worried as I was about them. They were good. I had no idea what the people were going to think of us. We had a darker sound with sinister lyrics. They were softer and were more about love. We had a 50/50 chance on people. It was the people that liked love songs against the people who liked stuff about murder. To put it into easier terms we were screwed.

I wanted nothing more than to forget about those depressing thoughts and just enjoy the night with my closest friends. I found that was going to be difficult with this sickening feeling gnawing at my stomach. The man from earlier appeared and announced that they were going to start the fireworks in three minutes.

Kyle stood up from sitting beside me on my left and stuck his thumbs in his front pockets. “I'm going to get something to drink while we have time, do you guys want anything?” He asked Cody and me.

Cody stood too. “I’ll go, I'm starving but I don’t know what I want.”

“Didn’t you just eat not too long ago?” Kyle asked him, laughing.

Cody laughed and rubbed his tummy. “Yeah, so? That doesn’t mean I'm not hungry now.”

“How can someone so damn skinny eat so damn much?” Kyle asked, shaking his head in disbelief.

“I have no idea, just ask my stomach.” Cody retorted. They looked down at me for an answer. “Well we’re about to go, are you coming?”

I just shook my head no, and then pulled on his arm to stop him from walking away. “No, don’t leave me alone with all of these people. I don’t know where the rest of the guys are and I don’t want to sit here all by myself.” I said, pleading for at least one of them to stay.

Cody chuckled and Kyle rolled his eyes. “You’ll be fine Chels’,” Cody said, making me let go. “We’ll try to find Blake or Will and I'll ask if they will come and sit with you, okay?” He asked.

I sighed. “Fine, but just please hurry. I don’t trust drunks.”

He laughed but I was serious. My mother was a drunk and so was my stepfather. They both laid their hands on me each time they were drinking and were ten times worse than when sober. My mother would hit me harder and he wouldn’t control his touching me. I hated alcoholics. They both walked away then, leaving me to sit there in the dreaded memories I didn’t want to relive.

The three minutes had passed and the show had started. I was still sitting by myself in the damn heat of the night, staring into the fire. I looked around me, hoping to see Kyle, Cody or any of my band mates. Instead I saw Brian, our manager. I stood up, wanting to walk over to him and at least have someone to talk to and not be by myself. He was a cool person and was easy to talk to and get along with, so I didn’t have any trouble making a conversation with him.

He was standing in the middle of many people laughing with a beer bottle in his hand. He was surrounded by two men and a woman who was around his age. I made my way over there, hoping he didn’t mind talking to someone who wasn’t his age.

I watched my feet as I walked over to him, but ended up having to actually watch where I was going and try not to bump into people. Because of my unfortunate luck, and my big hips, I kept accidentally shoving into people.

I was going to say this straight up, I was a skinny person, but I was also curvy. I disliked my figure, especially because of my bonny-ass hips. They weren’t love handles made of pure body fat but instead were mostly my hipbones. I was also lucky to have fair sized boobs, but I still hated the way I looked. On paper, it sounded great, I guess, and other girls may have wanted my shape, but I would trade it in with anyone who wasn’t shaped like an hourglass.

Suddenly my hips smacked into someone, causing him to wheel backwards, grabbing at anything he could to keep from falling. He grabbed onto my arm to keep himself up but instead all of his weight just pulled me down with him. I ended up landing on top of him, and for a moment there, my lungs felt like they had collapsed. I struggled to breath for a moment there, trying to regain control when I forgot about falling on some random guy.

I looked down at his face from lying on top of him. He had a hat on with it facing backwards and a blue bandanna underneath. His eyes were squinted closed and for a moment there I thought I somehow knocked him out. He grunted then and exhaled and so did I, relieved he was okay.

I tried standing but something was pinning me down, pressing me against him. I looked behind me as much as I could to see that someone else was on top of me. It was another guy, who was now beginning to stand up.

“What the fuck, Matt? Why the hell did you grab onto me like tha-” The person that was on top of me started to say but then looked down at us still on the ground. He suddenly burst laughter, clutching onto what was now an empty beer bottle.

I stood then, having to pull myself up with my aching muscles from falling so hard and someone landing on me. It felt like I fell on hard cement or something. I dusted myself off, trying to wipe away the dirt that was on my jeans.

“What the fuck just happened?” The guy that was pinned underneath me said while struggling to stand up but eventually did.

“I think this chick just ran into you and knocked you over. You tried to keep from falling by dragging me down with you!” The first one to stand shouted, throwing the empty bottle into the fire.

I scowled at him for calling me a chick but he didn’t seem to notice.

The one in the hat grunted again. “Shut up Brian.” He looked at me then, I guess to see who just almost knocked him out.

He had a lip piercing on the left side of his mouth, which was formed into a frown. It was too dark to tell what color his eyes were and his hat kept me from seeing his hair color, too. The other guy was putting his fedora back on his medium-length black hair. He also had a piercing on the right side of his nose and what looked like dark brown eyes.

“Are you okay?” The one with the backwards hat asked after a minute of silence.

I nodded. “I am so sorry, I really am. I wasn’t watching where I was going. I am terribly sorry.” I rambled, throwing my hands up in defense, hoping I didn’t piss anybody off and it sounded like the Brian guy was mad.

He held his hands up to stop me from continuing. “It’s alright, I wasn’t either. It’s my fault.” He lifted his broken sunglasses from hanging on his shirt collar.

“Oh no, I'm sorry. I-I” I started to say but he interrupted.

“It’s…alright, I guess. At least they weren’t my favorites.” He said calmly but I could see a little bit of irritation in his eyes.

“I'm sorry. It was my fault for trying to watch my feet as I walked. I’ll buy you a new pair, I promise.” I said just trying to find a way for him to realize I truly was sorry.

“Chill, it’s alright. We collided into each other, so it’s both our faults, how about that?” He asked, his words containing a little bit of venom.

“Don’t worry” The Brian guy stepped in, talking to me. “He’s got about fifty of the same ones, so no big deal.”

I tried not to chuckle but it ended up escaping from my mouth anyway.

“Oh, shut up Brian.” The other guy said. Didn’t he say his name was Matt? The other guy was definitely named Brian.

“I'm sorry…Matt, is it?” I asked him.

He nodded. “Yeah, and don’t worry about it, okay? Just stop apologizing.” He somewhat chuckled.

“Sorry he’s so rude, he has anger issues sometimes.” Brian said. Matt growled under his breath. “I'm Brian by the way. Brian Haner, but you can call me Synyster, Syn, or Gates.” He said, holding out his hand for me to shake it.

I gave him a weird look but returned the handshake. “Chelsea Daniels.” I said, weary about giving some random guy my name.

He smiled. “Nice to meet you, Chelsea.”

I chuckled under my breath nervously.

“And I'm sorry he’s such a freak, a pervert and is somewhat of a creep. Not to mention he’s kind of full of himself.” Matt said laughing.

I glanced over at Brian. I didn’t know if I should laugh or go hide. Brian spun around to face Matt. “Shut up Matt, I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.” He turned back to me. “And the incredible hulk over there is Matt Sanders.” I did laugh then, but tried to hide it by covering my mouth with my hand. “You can call him Matt, Shadows or Shadz.”

They looked at me then, with Brian the only one smiling. I thought they both were somewhat cute but I found the one with the broken Aviators even better looking. Gosh, I sounded like a teenager.

“Hey!” I heard someone shout.

We all looked behind us to see three guys in different sizes coming and walking towards us. I saw Brian smile.

“Here comes the guys,” Matt said with dread in his voice.

“Jesus Christ, what the fuck did you do Matt?” A tall, black haired guy said as he and two others were walking up to us. He was dressed in all black with a Vengeance University T-shirt and some skinny jeans with a hole ripped at the knee. He had on a silver studded belt that was turned sideways and only went through the very right belt loop. He wore white tennis shoes that were a little dirty and gave away that his feet were huge. The closer he got, the more it seemed like I've met him before but I couldn’t put my finger on it.

One of the other guys, the one mid-height between the three of them also wore a lot of black. He wore a black Jack Daniels shirt and simple dark-washed jeans with some Vans. He too, had black hair but it was in a completely different style and was flipped to the left at the bangs. He had snakebites, gagged ears and his septum pierced. He was wearing sunglasses even though it was dark outside so I couldn’t really see his eyes.

The shortest one had a Mohawk and wore a simple, solid black T-shirt and black jeans and had on black converse. He had a piercing on the right side of his nose too, and one on his right eyebrow. They stood in front of us just as the tall one finished his sentence. The tall one gave me a look, nothing mean or anything. It was more as if I had looked familiar, too. Maybe I had seen him from somewhere before. The look disappeared as fast as it came and I shrugged it off.

Matt snorted, offended. “I didn’t do anything. She’s the one who bumped into me.” He said, changing his words from saying it was also his fault, but I just ignored it.

“And again, I'm sorry.” I added, hopping just to get away.

“It’s alright,” Brian said with a sly smile. “We all know Matt’s a dumb ass and needs to watch where the fuck he’s going.”

Everyone but Matt and I laughed. Matt instead responded with a punch into Brian's shoulder.

“Ow!” Brian shouted, clutching his arm. “What the fuck Matt?”

He sure did cuss a lot. The others chuckled then at his reaction.

“So who’s your friend?” The shortest one asked, eyeing me. It was obvious that they had all been drinking tonight. “Hi, I'm Johnny.” He waved with a grin on his face.

I waved back quickly and gave a half-hearted smile back. “I'm-”

“She’s not my friend. As I just said, we bumped into each other.” Matt said, clenching his teeth.

“No, at first you said it was all her fault, but then just changed your story and said you bumped into each other.” Johnny gleamed.

Matt gave him a dirty look. “Shut up, short shit. Quit being such a fuckin’ smart ass.”

“Yeah, I think I'll just go now.” I said about to walk away. I turned and was ready to leave when Brian, my tour manager had started walking towards me, a look of concern coming across his face.

He finally reached me. “Chelsea, are you okay? What happened?” He asked, stopping me from escaping.

I sighed. “Nothing, I'm fine. I was just being my usual self, a klutz.” I said with bitterness in my voice.

He was about to smile but stopped himself. “Are you sure? I saw you fall and-”

“Chelsea!” I heard rather Blake or Will shout, one or the other, I couldn’t tell from all of this noise.

Everyone followed the sound, looking for who was talking. All my band mates came up to us. Everyone but Cody, who was smiling, had a worried look on their face. I groaned in displeasure. I couldn’t believe this. Everyone had seen me fall on someone, then someone fall on me and now they were never going to let me down for it. I knew this would happen. I knew one day my clumsiness was going to get the best of me.

“What’s going on?” Blake asked as they all stood in front of me next to our Brian.

From now on, I was going to call the Brian I just met Syn’ or Gates, and my manager by his first name, but I was certain this was the last time I would see Syn’ and his friends.

Brian chuckled. “Chelsea just ran over someone.”

I scowled. “I did not! I just…bumped into him and I basically fell on top of him.” I said, my voice growing into a low mumble at the last part, hoping they didn’t catch it.

Cody busted up laughing. “You fell on top of someone? Who was it?” He asked, and then looked up past me at a wall of five guys, a couple of them with slightly heavy builds and all covered in tattoos standing behind me. His smile faded and became worried too. “You okay?”

I nodded and spoke under my breath to where only my band could hear me. “I'm fine, okay? Can we just go now?”

Brian nodded and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. “Yeah, let’s go.” He said, walking me along with him and the guys.

“Did you guys catch the show?” I asked them, noticing it had ended and was hoping they would drop the subject.

“Yeah, it was okay, I guess, you know, as far as fireworks go.” Will shrugged.

Well I it was nice to know that they were all looking for me instead of watching fireworks and having fun.

“Whatever, I had fun. I don’t know about the rest of you. So,” Cody paused, looking at me and stealing a spot in between me and Blake as we walked. “How did your night go?” He asked sarcastically. He knew this was going to get a rise out of me.

I growled. “Can you just drop it? I know, I know. I am such a fucking klutz. When are you going to let that go? Never?” I asked, getting mad.

His smile didn’t fade and only backed off and went back in between Will and Kyle.

Brian dropped his arms and shoved his hands in his pockets but then pulled out his cell phone. “Damn guys, we better head back. It’s almost 11:40. You need some sleep before tomorrow’s show." Everyone started cursing then.

Cody started whining. "But mom!" He said, making fun of South Park, his favorite show. We all laughed. Well it was good to know that my bad mood didn’t affect his good one, which was something he always had.

"I'm tired," I mumbled, walking mindlessly with the guys to our tour bus.

"You’re already tired? The party has only just begun." Will laughed from my left.

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "As soon as we get on to that bus, I'm passing out." I said, looking forward to sleep.

"Party pooper." Cody mumbled but I actually heard it from where I stood. We got to our bus and stood at the door while Brian unlocked it.

"Hey, I am not a party pooper, I just-"

"We know. Youjust want to get everything right tomorrow, we know." Kyle said, also rolling his eyes.

We stepped inside. Brian went straight for the couch and flipped on TV to some basketball game.

"Well you can't blame me." I said once every one was inside. "What if I screw up? What if I accidentally trip on a wire and fall flat on my face? You know how clumsy I can get. This is our first show and I want everything to be perfect."

Blake put his hand on my shoulder. "It will all be fine. You just have to calm down. Yeah, you are a klutz, we all know that, but the more you let that get in the way of your life the more it will overtake you. You have to be the one in control, not the clumsiness. Okay? Just stay calm and everything will be fine."

I took in his words. He was right, like usual. Typical Blake to be the one to have to step in and settle everything. It was something he was really good for.

I nodded. "You’re right," I admitted. "But what about that new band…Paramore? What if they are better than us? What if people like them more?"

"Okay that’s it." Will said, stepping in front of Blake and stealing me away. He led me into the bunkroom. "From now I don’t want to hear any more of you worrying about tomorrow. I don’t want to hear another word about you falling and about that other band. Do you understand?" He said, sitting me inside my bunk and stood in front of me. "Get some rest and we’ll see you tomorrow." He said, closing the door past him, leaving me alone in the small room.

I sighed. Believe me, I wanted nothing more than to stop worrying so much, but that was just who I was. There was no getting around the weariness. It’s just that I have had this dream for so long to become a singer in a band and I wanted everything to be perfect. I didn’t want anyone to take my dream away from me. But for now, I was just going to release all of my thoughts and go to sleep.

I laid back in my bunk and pulled the curtains to where no one could see me. I could only sleep in darkness or I would never get any sleep at all. I pulled out my iPod from under my pillow and turned it to an old song of Fall Out Boy’s. It was their song Chicago is so two years ago, my favorite of theirs. That song could really get me to sleep, and not in a bad way. It was like a lullaby to me. I put the whole ‘Take this to your grave’ album on repeat and slowly but surely fell into a blissful sleep.

Notes