Chapter Nineteen:

I groaned and stretched my arms, before repositioning them around Brian’s neck. I threaded my fingers through his hair as he trailed wet kisses down my neck. I gasped and turned to face him. I captured his lips with my own and slipped my tongue into his mouth. He dug his fingers into my back and held me closer to his body. I ground myself against him, as I straddled his lap. I nuzzled his neck and nipped at his ear, causing him to growl.

“The bath’s going to get cold.” I mumbled, trying to catch my breath.

“Let it.”

“I don’t want to take a cold bath.”

“Then we can pick this up later, Ace.” He relented, as he placed another knee-weakening kiss against my mouth.

“If you don’t stop kissing me, I’m never going to make it to the bathroom.” I warned.

“You make it sound like such a bad thing.”

“It is when I feel dirty and I can’t get clean.” I told him. Something about the way I said it, must have make him pull back, because he did. He carried me to the bathroom and turned around as I pulled off my tired clothes. I stepped into the hot, bubbly water and sank down. It burns my skin, but it’s welcome over the reminders about earlier today.

I made sure I was completely submerged in bubbles before I glanced behind me at Brian. He’s still facing away from me, respecting my privacy. The little things – his tendency to give me exactly what I need without me having to tell him – make me care about him even more.

“You can turn around; I’m decent.” I called to him. He turned around and smiled at me.

“I don’t have to stay in here, if it makes you uncomfortable. That’s the last thing I want.” He told me, leaning against the tub, kissing my forehead. I shook my head.

“Please, stay – I don’t want to be alone.” I pleaded, placing my wet hand over his warm one. He chuckled.

“I’ll stay. I just don’t want you to feel pressured to do anything, on my benefit.” He explained, looking me in the eyes. I nodded.

“I get it and you’re a prince because of it. But, I really do want you to stay. It doesn’t bother me. I just… I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts. They tend to run wild and take over. I don’t do so hot when that happens.” I confessed.

“Do you need anything?” He offered. I bit my lip and forced myself to focus on his question – not on everything else that went on today. I nodded, slowly.

“Would you mind grabbing my meds? I feel okay… but I don’t want an episode to hit me full force. I think I’m still in shock. Everything that happened… it hasn’t really hit me yet.”

“Sure thing, I’ll be back.” He tilted my chin up and kissed me. I gave him a slight smile and watched him walk out of the bathroom. “It’s so quiet in here.” He called from the bedroom.

“My iPod should be in my purse; I have a dock-station in the bathroom.” I told him. I heard rummaging.

“I don’t see it.” He said. I frowned.

“It may have fallen out in my car.” I voiced.

“I’ll go look for it. I’ll be back.” He told me, popping his head back into the bathroom. I nodded. He shot me a quick grin before shutting the bathroom door behind him.

---

Brian’s POV

I closed Ace’s bedroom door before I walked downstairs. Even though, I’ve known her for a short while, I still feel like there’s so much to learn about her. She has so many layers. It’s like she’s been through so much shit in her life, so she has trouble trusting people. Whether she realizes it or not, she has these walls up. Sometimes, she’s this carefree, teenager. Other times, she’s this grown woman that seems so weathered and scared of the world.

“Hey bro, she okay?” Jimmy asked me. I looked over at him and nodded.

“She’s trying to be. I don’t think everything has hit her yet – you know?” I told him. Jimmy nodded. He gets it. He’s been through his fair share of the receiving end as far as shit’s concerned with his own life.

“We’re here if she needs anything, man.” He assured me. I grinned.

“Thanks, I’ll let her know. I’m sure we’ll be down soon. She just needs some time… You know.”

“I get it. No worries.” Jimmy hugged me and clapped my back before heading into the kitchen. I fingered Lydia’s keys before going outside and looking through her car. Half of her purse’s contents were lying scattered in the passenger’s seat. I doubt she was thinking about it when she was driving last. I picked her iPod and the rest of her things before locking the door and heading back inside.

---

I laid her things on her nightstand and picked up her iPod as her phone started ringing. I fished it off of her bed and picked it up. It’s Oliver, that friend that she told me about. She’s got four missed calls from him. I decided to answer it.

“Hello?” I said, not knowing what to expect.

“Hey, yeah, did I dial the right number? I’m looking for Lydia Wolf.” The guy on the other end of the line answered.

“You did – this is Brian. She’s taking a bath.” I told him.

“Ahh, you’re the infamous Brian. How’s she doin’ man?” He asked me.

“Honestly? It’s been an insane day, from what she’s told me. Derek showed up at her mom’s place and they fought. Doug said that she tased his ass and was able to get him off of her. He had some of his guys take care of him.”

“Doug is the guy who’s doing her mom, right?” He asked.

“Yeah, he’s the one. He’s a good guy, though. I’ve known him and his son since I was a kid. He seems to have really taken a liking to Lydia.”

“That’s good. God knows she’s met enough shitty people to last her a lifetime.”

“I’m worried about her. I know I probably shouldn’t be talking to you or telling you this, but I think she’s in shock. She’s talked about it a little bit, but she’s scared. I don’t think she wants to let on how freaked out she is. Her mom comes back into town next week, and I’m pretty sure that’s making things worse.” I told him.

“Lydia is complicated. She doesn’t like having to admit that she can’t always take care of herself. She’s tough and I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone as strong as she is. She’s been through a lot. You probably don’t even know the half of it. That’s just how she works, though. It’s not like she tries to keep things from people, she just wants to believe that she’s invincible. Just give her some time and ask her about the things you want to know. She’ll tell you when she’s ready. There aren’t a ton of men that she trusts. I’ve never heard her say a bad thing about you, so I think it’s safe to say that you’re one of them. She’s like my little sister. Don’t break her heart, man.” Oliver explained.

“Don’t worry. I don’t plan on it.”

“Good. Then I don’t have to go through the big brother spiel and threaten you.” He joked. I laughed. “Listen, I’ve been talking to Lyds about coming out to see her soon. It’s looking like it’s going to be sooner than later. I have a few assignments to finish with school, but when those are out of the way, I’m going to head out there with a friend of ours. Can you ask her to call me when she’s feeling up to it? Or at least text me? So I know that her mental state isn’t completely blown to shreds.” He requested.

“Yeah, sure… and thanks Oliver. What you said, it helped… a lot.”

“Don’t mention it. Any friend of Lydia’s is a friend of mine.”

“I better go, but I’ll make sure she calls you.” I told him.

“Awesome, thanks. If she’s having as bad of a day as it sounds, I suggest chocolate, ice cream, and Buffy. I wouldn’t leave her alone for too long. It’ll help her stay distracted.”

“Thanks. I’ll do that.”

“Alright, later.” Oliver hung up. I stared at the phone before heading back to Ace. I opened the bathroom door and she looked over at me, giving me a ghost of a smile.

“I found it.” I told her, showing her the music device. I set it into the dock-station.

“Thank you.” She told me softly.

“Oliver called. He wants you to call him back when you feel up to it. He said no rush, though. And to text him so he knew you weren’t losing it.” I relayed the message. I handed her the pills and a bottle of water from the bathroom counter. She took it and nodded.

“Alright. I will. Did you guys get along?” She asked.

“Yeah, we did. He seems like a good guy.”

“He’s the best.” She smiled. “Play something?” She requested.

“What are you in the mood for?”

“Anything.”

---

Lydia’s POV

I watched Brian as he fiddled with the stereo system. I got really lucky. He’s such a good guy. I wonder how long things will last or stay this way. I’m not like other girls. I can’t give him everything that he deserves. I’ve tried to do the mindless sex thing because I just wanted to see something. When my mother was force-feeding me prescriptions, that was one of the darkest times of my entire life.

I just wanted to feel something – anything. I was tired of feeling numb and unclean. I wanted to feel anything but the empty disconnect.

I’m not proud of it, but I can’t change the past or what happened. Sexually, I can’t deliver. It’s taken me so much time to try and get past a lot of things. With everything that’s been happening lately, I’ve been back-tracking.

I’ve been in relationships that fail because the guy just runs out of patience. I come with a ton of baggage and it’s a lot to ask anyone to take on.

My attention was brought back to Brian when music started playing.

My immaculate dream made of breath and skin – I’ve been waiting for you.

“You okay, Ace?” Brian asked me, crouching next to me. I shrugged.

“Dating me… it’s not easy, Brian.” I whispered. “I wouldn’t blame you if you decide it’s too much for you.” I told him. He sighed and didn’t say anything.

I can’t help but keep from falling apart, at the seams.
I cannot believe you’re taking my heart, to pieces.

“Ace, there’s no one I’d rather be with than you. I don’t care about easy. You’re worth the work.” He promised me. I want to believe him.

Ohh, it might take a little time, might take a little crime, to come undone.
Now, we’ll try and stay blind, to the hope and fear outside.
Hey child, stay wilder than the wind, can blow me into crime.

“You don’t have to say that.” I pressed.

“I know I don’t have to – I want to.” He argued.

Who do you need?
Who do you love, when you come undone?

“Brian,” I started. He held up a hand to stop me.

“Let me show you that you’re worth it.” He whispered. “I want to be with you. Don’t push me away.”

“I won’t push you away, anymore.” I told him.

“Good,” he murmured. He leaned down and kissed me. I closed my eyes and kissed him back. There was an unspoken promise that everything would be alright and things would work out. It told me that he would be there for me and I didn’t have to worry. I tried to tell him that I would try and take down my walls and I would be good on my word.

We pulled away and I covered my chest. Some of the bubbles have begun to disappear. I cleared my throat.

“Can you step outside? I want to get out.” I asked. He nodded. “Then we can do something that doesn’t require us to think.” I quipped. I pulled the stopper out of the tub and got out. I toweled off and slipped on my robe.

“Buffy marathon?” Brian asked. I laughed as my eyebrows rose.

“How did you know?”

“Oliver may have mentioned it.”

“Remind me to thank him, but somehow, I doubt the guys will want to watch it.” I told him as I grabbed some loose clothes from the dresser. I faced away from Brian as I dropped my robe. I pulled on my softest undergarments.

“I think you underestimate how hot the male population thinks Sarah Michelle Gellar is.” Brian teased.

“That’s true.” I agreed, as I pulled on a tank top and oversized sweater. I grabbed a pair of cotton shorts and slipped them on.

“Hey, can I come in?” Zacky asked, after knocking on the door.

“Yeah, it’s open.” I called out. He poked his head in and opened the door the rest of the way.

“Cold?” Zack asked me. I nodded, slightly.

“I thought I packed sweats, but I must’ve forgotten.” I told him.

“I’ll grab you a pair of mine.” He offered.

“Only if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind.”

---

I was cuddled up to Brian on the couch as the guys argued about who would win in a fight – Angel or Spike. Apparently, Spike would be the claimed victor.

“Dinner’s here!” Doug called to us, from the front door. We followed him to the kitchen. Zacky started handing out plates.

“You’re swimming in those, aren’t you?” Zack asked me, gesturing the pants he loaned me. I nodded.

“Just a little,” I agreed.

“If you weren’t so short, it wouldn’t be a problem.” Johnny teased.

“Like you’re one to talk!”

“Hey!”

“And I prefer petite!” I quipped.

“Before Ace kicks your ass, we should eat before the grub gets cold.” Brian spoke up.

“Please, like she could.” Johnny snorted.

“Try me, Shorty.”

“I’d pay to see that, actually.” Doug chimed in. I laughed. Maybe things aren’t so bad, after all.

Notes

Music Credit:
"Come Undone" (Cover) - My Darkest Days/Duran Duran

I will try for another short chapter tonight. I'm crazy, ecstatic to bring some friends from Lydia's past into the mix. Lynn will be resurfacing soon!

Predictions? Comments?

Xo
Katie