“Out” I said and tried to walk past him but he grabbed me by the waist and I hissed in pain.
He let go of me and just watched me with an apologizing look in his eyes. I looked up at him again and then I just couldn’t take the silence any more.

“What do you want?” I spat at him.

“I’m sorry…” he mumbled while scratching his head. “ I didn’t mean to-“

“You didn’t mean to what? Huh? To make me feel miserable, wanting to die and feeling worthless, because of the ‘bitch’ I am? Huh, well look” I said emphasizing “bitch” as I pulled up my shirt revealing the purple and black bruises. “See? Mission accomplished.” I spat at him and pushed past him.

I went by my locker to grab my jacket and the last of the crap I had in there, I then realized that I had forgotten my cellphone in the music room. ‘Fuck! Now I have to go back in there…’ I groaned quietly to myself. I had a mental battle, debating whether I should get my cellphone and probably face the jerk or leave it there risking it to get stolen.

My feet started to move to the direction of the music room and I took a deep breath as I opened the door to find the room empty. I sighed quietly from relief as I walked towards the piano and got a hold of my cellphone. I looked over at the piano feeling an urge to play it. As corny as this sounds my heart wanted to play but my mind didn’t want the risk to get… well “caught” again. I reluctantly sat in front of the piano and started playing another of my songs or whatever to call it.

I hit the keys and tried to sing to it, but it just felt wrong. The tone and everything, I tried again by changing the tone of my voice, still nothing. I got more and more annoyed then I heard the door open and in walked the jerk. My eyes just followed his moves as he got closer and closer to me. My breathing became heavier as my thoughts set in to what he was going to do to me. Especially after my ‘outburst’ before.

He sat down next to me on the piano chair and looked at me.
“Ok, I know you have every reason to hate me, but just hear me out okay?” he called softly with sincerity in his eyes.

I nodded slowly kind of intrigued and curious about what he wanted since he never is like this, towards me.
He leaned forward a bit and then reached for my hand but I pulled away.
“I won’t hurt you ok? Just let me show you something…” he explained calmly.

He then reached for my hand and placed it a bit differently on the piano, placed my fingers right place. Then he turned to me and said “Try now”.

“What?” I asked in confusion.
“I kind of heard you again… Just try playing it ok?” he pleaded.

I started pressing the keys and hummed to myself as I got into the right place of the song. I started hesitating and saw in the corner of my eyes how Matt followed every move I made on the piano.

Here goes nothing.

“I can't hold on to me,
Wonder what's wrong with me.

Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium, I want to stay in love with my sorrow.

Don't want to let it lay me down this time.
Drown my will to fly.
Here in the darkness I know myself.
Can't break free until I let it go.
Let me go.

Darling, I forgive you... After all,
Anything is better than to be alone.
And in the end I guess I had to fall.
Always find my place among the ashes.

I can't hold on to me,
Wonder what's wrong with me.” (DISCLAIMER: I Do not own these lyrics or Evanescence)

I released myself from the piano and sat there waiting to hear something. At this point I was confused, for 2 years he had made my life a living hell. Not that it already wasn’t but I never guessed it could get worse and now on, what? Like 2-3 days he started acting nice? This can’t be right.

It was quiet for a few minutes but I decided to break the silence.
“Thanks for the help.”
“I just have to ask… uhm… How did you know what I did wrong?”

He chuckled slightly and answered my question.
“I’ve played piano for like 6 years plus I have a band. So I kind am involved with shit like that.”

“Oh… Well I got to go” I said and went for my back pack, then I turned around seeing Matt staring at me.
I cleared my throat and he snapped out of his daze or whatever he was doing then I sent him a small smile for some reason I wasn’t aware off. When I walked in the hallway heading to the exit I heard my name being called. I turned around and there Matt was sprinting after me.

“So, I was just uh… wondering if you wanted to hang with me and the band someday after school?”
“I don’t know…” I responded quietly, doubting his intensions.
“Look.. I know you probably hate me and just want me to fuck off but can’t we just at least show our music since you kind of showed me?” he asked with a small smile tugging on the corner of his mouth.
“Maybe… I don’t know. Sorry”

As I turned to walk out yet again Matt grabbed my arm and turned me facing him.
“Can I at least get your number so I can text ya?”
“Fine” I said and clicked in my number in his cell so I just could get home a soon as possible.
“Thanks!”

When I got home I called Jacob and asked him to come over as soon as possible. 1 hour later I heard a knock at the door and Jacob popping his head in.

“Hey! What’s up?” he grinned and hugged me.
“Hi, not much… Just , well I really need to tell ya something” I told him as I hugged him back.
“ ok, talk!” he squealed like a girl when he jumped on the bed next to me.
“Oh my fucking god, what was that Jacobina?” I teased
“You know that was awesome” He winked “Now talk.”
I explained everything that happened this weekend and today, all about Matt. The fact that he started acting nice and actually seemed like he was human. The fact that he invited me over to see his band play.
“So wait… He’s starting to act nice after being such a dipshit and now he fucking invites you to see him play? What the fuck is his problem?” Jacob hissed.
“I don’t know, whatever it is I am not trusting him at all. Plus, he seems very determined to get me to see his band playing and I am not going alone if so. That’s why you’ll have to come with me!” I explained.
“Fine, but if he pulls shit like that I’m beating the living shit out of him!” he warned.
“Deal!”

We watched a movie then after that we ate dinner. Of course Jacob wanted to see another movie so we headed back to my room and watched “Lord of the Rings”. The night ended with me and Jacob falling asleep back to back on my bed.

‘Beep-Beep’ ‘Beep-Beep’ ‘Beeeeeeeep’
Sighing I rolled over and slammed the snooze button on the alarm clock then I nudged Jacob to wake him up.
We got ready and headed for school together, we reached the school areas and all the school-gangs were out. That meaning, the jocks, the nerds, the cheerleaders etc.

Jacob and I were in the middle of telling jokes when someone called on me.
I turned around and surprise, surprise, Matt was there.
“Thought he was going to get embarrassed by calling my name out loudly” I muttered quietly to Jacob.
As Matt got closer Jacob started walking away. “ See ya later, okey?” he shouted when he disappeared into the school building.

“Hey… Uhm, so I was wondering if you wanted to come to band practice after school today? Hope ya don’t mind but I sort of told the guys about your voice and so on…” he chuckled acting slightly nervous.

“Maybe… Can I bring someone with me?” I asked knowing that there was no chance in hell that I would go there alone. Sure, Matt and his poss had been real jerks but I'm curious... Are they any good?
“uh, yeah. Sure. I’ll text ya the deets later” he exclaimed. Then I turned my heels and walked back into school.
Why the hell did he act nervous? Seriously, he’s mindfucked. First he’s a douche and now he fucking wants me to ‘hang’ out with him.

The day in school passed pretty quickly, when I packed up my stuff I went over to Jacob’s locker.
I waited for a few minutes when he got out then I got ready for him to maybe get a bit pissed.
“Hey, Jacobina!” I teased.
“Heey Lee”
“Uhm, what are you doing today?”
“nothin.. I guess”
“Wrong! You’re going with me to jerk-a lot’s band practice” I blurred out.
“WHAT. Today? Now? When? What? How?”
“Yes, I don’t know when. Band practice. He asked me before school.”
“ He really couldn’t wait could he?” he chuckled trying not to sound pissed off.
“Nope I guess not.. He said he would text me and I quote ‘the deets’”
“So what are we supposed to do ‘til then?”
“We can hang at my place? Or go to the beach?” I suggested with a bored tone to my voice.
“BEACH. We need more movies at your place so definitely.” He chuckled.
“pfft, smartass”

We headed towards the beach and as usual just lay in the sand talking about everything. The thing is between me and Jacob, we never end up quiet, and we always have something to talk about. He’s like my older brother even though he’s younger which doesn’t make any sense.

Suddenly my cellphone started to beep. I opened the message and read;

Hey! Band practice in like 20 minutes… Huntingtondrive 234..
See ya thuurrr

“We have to be there in 20 minutes” I sighed.
“Let’s go then!” Jacob shouted and connected his arm with mine or as we called it we were ‘hooking up’. Yes I know we are lame! =)

As we walked on the sidewalk we started hearing at drumming sound beating really fast. Then we noticed a house that had its garage door open so we guessed that the sound came from there. This was the address jerk-a lot gave to me so I guess we found it. Me and Jacob let each other’s hook go and just bumped in each other with our hips. That’s was how we were, either silly together or shy alone. We got closer to the garage when Jerk-a lot stuck his head out and waved us over. Now I started to feel nervous and tense, which Jacob seemed to notice so he put his arm around my shoulders. I looked up at him and gave him a ‘thank you’ look, he nodded. When we got to the garage we stood there and everybody’s faces turned to us. ‘Crap’ now I am really nervous. Jacob gave me a soft squeeze on my arm to calm me down a bit.

“Uhmn guys this is..uhm..” Matt spoke and waited for me to say my name.
“Call me Ames.” I said fast. Jacob looked at me questionley. I didn’t want to say my name, so they could call me by my nickname.
“Uh, Jacob.” He said as he cleared his throat.
As soon as Jacob said his name Matt just got a mean glare in his eyes. What the fuck is his problem?
“yaah, whatever… This is our band… We’re called Avenged Sevenfold… uhm guys… You remember what I told you yesterday? That’s her… Ames..” he summarized.
They rest of his band looked shocked, their eyes were wide open and well their mouths too.
“What?” I managed to get out a bit quietly whilst looking down at the floor.

“Nothin’… He just said you have the voice of an ang- a good voice” The guy with the snakebites managed to slip when Matt hit his arm.
I made an “O” face and nodded slowly. Matt waved us over to a torn out couch and we sat there. There was an awkward silence in there and it felt like everybody kept staring at us. It felt uncomfortable just sitting there, the guys just stood there tuning their gear and sending us looks every once in a while.

After 5 minutes Jacob started getting impatient, I know he really hates the guys and just want to get this over with so I decided to pinch his thigh.

“Ah, what the fuck A?” he squirmed.
“You looked bored” I laughed and noticed that they guys were yet to stand and stare at us. At this point I just wanted to have fun no matter who it was with. No matter who.
“You want a pinch too?” I asked with a small devious smirk. The guys shook their heads with small smiles plastered on their faces.
“Didn’t think so” I replied in a smart ass tone as I crossed my arms and leaned on Jacobs shoulder. He pulled his arm around me and we sat there, waiting even longer.
“So what? You together or?” one of the guys with brown eyes and black hair asked.
“pfft, no! Just really good friends!” Jacob replied and I happily smiled up at him.
“Is it ok if I go out for 10 minutes?” I wondered since I really wanted to sit at the beach for a while.
“Sure” the guy with the snakebites answered.

Jacob grabbed my hand and questioned “Want me to come with?” with a soft voice.

I shook my head ‘no’ and headed out, as I got to the beach I sat down. The past few days I’ve thought over what Mr.Hansen and Jer-Matt have said… Maybe I should take the chance to sing and actually show myself? The only thing is I am scared out of my mind, I’ve been hurt before and I ‘ve managed to shut my feelings off but when it comes to playing my music, to sing then I don’t want to risk getting stomped on.

Music is the only thing that’s kept me sane after all. I took a deep breath and got back up on my feet. I swept of the sand from my pants and was about to walk when I hit something hard but yet warm. Somebody’s chest. That somebody was looking at me sadly.