Who I Really Am

​Izzy closed the front door behind her and walked into the lounge of the colonial stye home she shared with Amber. She dropped down onto the couch glad to be finally home. Fighting her way through the LA traffic was the only downside to the job that she loved with a passion. Being able to bring the joy of the creatures she'd been fascinated with ever since she'd been a small child to other children every day was more than reward enough for having to endure a few long queues on the roads each day. 

And then of course there were days like today. Izzy couldn't help the small smile she felt appearing as she thought back to her encounter earlier that day. She'd be lying if she said she hadn't noticed Brian the moment he walked in. She wanted to believe that it had been the slight look of trepidation he'd worn, or the way he was tightly holding the hand of the young girl that had been with him.

However, Izzy was only human, and there was no getting away from the simple fact that Brian was extremely easy on the eye. She hadn't quite expected to see the side of him that she'd witnessed though, and that had made him all the more attractive. Not that it was of any real importance what she thought, it was highly doubtful that Izzy would ever see him again anyway.

"I've seen that look before. So, what's his name and just how cute was he?" 

Izzy laughed lightly as Amber joined her on the couch. 

"Have I ever told you there are times when I find your talent for knowing what's on my mind a little disturbing?" Izzy joked.

"Frequently, but stop avoiding the question and fill me in!" Amber demanded with a grin.

"He's called Brian, and he's quite possibley too pretty for his own good."

Izzy went on to explain the story, knowing exactly what Amber was bound to ask next. 

"And taking advantage of the fact that he was in a somewhat vulnerable state didn't cross your mind at all? Izzy! What is wrong with you?" Amber cried. 

"That's just not me, and you know that Amber. When in the all the years we've been friends have you ever known me to be forward with any male even remotely attractive?" 

Amber remained silent. She knew Izzy spoke the truth. Men had always been a stumbling block for her. She refused to be forward enough to show someone she was interested, almost as though she was afraid of being rejected. Not that it had ever been a problem in college, there had always been a long line of guys wanting to take Izzy out on a date.

However, the two that Amber recalled Izzy ever having any kind of relationship with soon found themselves single the moment they had started showing signs of wanting to maybe settle down with her. Amber knew why Izzy behaved that way, and she was very aware that if her friend continued to let certain aspects of her life rule her decisions, then Izzy was never going to find any kind of happiness 

"Iz, I love you dearly, and I respect the decisons that you've made, because from all that I know about you and of you, if that had been me, then I probably would've done the same. However, you can't continue to use those parts of your life as an excuse to push people away because you're afraid that their opinon of you or reasons for wanting to be with you will change. I didn't know any of those things when I first met you, but have I changed since you confided in me?"

Izzy frowned slightly. She had to admit that Amber was right, and she knew that at some point she was going to have to allow herself to trust others as much as she did the friend who sat beside her. Amber nudged her gently.

"Anyway, it's your turn to cook. What's on the menu?"

Izzy rolled her eyes,a smile tugging at her lips.

"Does taking you out for something to eat....inspite of the fact that I dislike you a little at this precise moment for always being right....actually count as my turn to cook?"

"I think I can go with that. It's probably the safer option anyway," Amber joked. "Where we heading?"

"Get a cab into Huntington and head for Ruby's sounds like a plan. Then maybe onto somewhere so that I can get recklessly drunk."

Amber gave Izzy a sideways glance.

"I'm glad you said that, because focusing on getting drunk might take the edge off me telling you that your dad called, and that he's going to call back tomorrow." 

Izzy stood up and headed for the stairs.

"Forget the recklessly, make that until I pass out in a puddle of my own vomit," she mumbled, not even wanting to think about tomorrow.

Brian walked ahead of his friends as they headed for yet another bar. As soon as he and Zacky had dropped the kids back to his sister, they had met up with the rest of the guys for what was originally meant to have been a few quiet beers. However, after having to endure listening to Zacky keep recounting the tale of Brian's episode in the museum to whoever would listen, Brian had decided that getting mind-blowingly drunk was the best way to deal with it.

There was only one minor flaw in Brian's plan, it wasn't working. Endless shots and bottles of beer were being passed in his direction, all of them being consumed with speed in hope of reaching the required state of inebriation. Yet all he managed to accomplish so far was the feeling of being slightly more relaxed than he had been when they'd first ventured out, and countless trips to the bathroom which in any other given situation would have been a cause for concern. 

Johnny's Bar came into sight, and Brian breathed a sigh of blessed relief, hoping that what would be their final destination of the evening was actually going to help him achieve his goal. Making the bar his first port of call, Brian ordered up five beers and six shots. Hell, if he was paying then he was entitled to two. He paid the bar tender and downed the two shots with precision, ignoring the burning sensation his throat was currently experiencing. Brian passed drinks to everyone and headed straight for an empty booth.

He sat aimlessly picking at the label on the bottle, his thoughts consumed with trying to figure out just what he was going to do. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd been in a situation like this. Actually biting the bullet and taking the step to go after a girl was something he hadn't done in a long time. And inspite of the fact that he hadn't been able to shake Izzy out of his head since they'd met, there was that little part of Brian that wondered if by doing so he'd come across as needy and desperate, something he didn't relish. 

"You look a little lost in thought there Gates, you ok?" 

Brian glanced up to find Matt standing at the table, a look of concern on his face. He went to answer only for Zacky to butt in.

"He's probably feeling sorry for himself, let a perfectly good woman slip through his fingers earlier."

Matt raised a questioning eyebrow as Zacky's words grabbed the attention of the rest of the group. Brian frowned, wondering just why Zacky was so insistant on making his evening as miserable as possible. So far he'd managed to keep the story regarding Izzy to himself, but now obviously felt the need for some new material for his audience.

"What woman?" Jimmy questioned, his interest suddenly diverted from watching something over by the pool table to what was plainly going to be another amusing chapter in Brian's misery. 

"The rather cute girl that came to his rescue and saved him from embarrassing himself any further," Zacky informed the group.

"Crazy snake lady?" Jimmy asked.

"What the....who the fuck said she was crazy?" Brian demanded. Jimmy held up his hands to calm him down.

"Well, you hear snake and lady in the same sentence...you kinda figure that she has to be crazy."

Brian rolled his eyes, shaking his head at the logic of his friend. 

"As soon as Syn saw her it was mouth open and thinking with his penis. And I actually think she may have liked him back, in spite of the girlish screams at the sight of her forked tongued friend."

"Of course she liked him, all the ladies want a piece of Gates now he's back on the market," Matt pointed out.

"It wasn't like that," Brian murmured.

"What was that?" Matt asked, not knowing if Brian had intended his words to be heard. 

"Man, there's some really cute drunk chick at the pool table, it's taken her nearly five minutes to line up a shot," Johnny randomly interjected as he returned from the bathroom. "Not that I minded, really nice ass," he added with a grin. 

The immediate focus drifted from Brian to the pool table, all eyes on the girl Johnny had mentioned. Except Brian, who sat there moodily drinking his beer.

"Gates."

Brian ignored Zacky at first, he'd heard enough of his voice for one night.

"Gates!" he called again, a little more demanding.

"What!"

"I think you should see this." 

Brian sighed and knelt up on the bench to get a glimpse of whatever it was that was so important. The lighting was a little dim, making it hard to make out what was happening at first. Brian's eyes widened once it became clear just why Zack had been calling him.

"Fuck!" he whispered, jumping up but not quite knowing what to do.

"Syn, I think now may be the time to be a hero," Zacky told him.

Brian just nodded, trampling on Jimmy in his haste to get out the booth.

"Are we missing something? Who the hell is that chick?" Matt enquired, completely confused as he watched Brian approach the woman currently downing more tequila.

"Crazy snake lady," Zacky answered with a grin.

Brian couldn't help the smirk that appeared in spite of the nervous feeling that gripped him. She may have been drunk off her ass but there was no denying that she managed to remain incredibley cute in the process. He stopped for a moment as he watched Izzy tip her head right back, another shot quick to disappear. He knew what was coming next, quickly stepping behind her as she went to put the glass down, losing her balance. 

"Woah there Izzy," he told her with a slight chuckle, holding her tightly. 

"Who's that?" she slurred, trying to get a look at the owner of the chest she was resting against. "Oh," she murmured, recognition spreading across her face.

"You here alone?" Brian asked softly, trying to turn Izzy round without her falling over.

Izzy closed her eyes and shook her head.

"Am..Amber's here some ...where."

"Oh shit! Izzy!"

Brian looked over his shoulder to see who he presumed to be Amber standing with a bottle of water in her hand, wearing a look of panic.

"Is that for her?" Brian nodded down at Izzy.

"Yeah, I figured she'd had enough.I'm so sorry."

"No worries. Ok Izzy, let's get you sat down."

Brian guided her over to a chair, kneeling down in front of her. Amber handed him the water.

"Thanks. I'm Brian by the way," he told her.

"Amber..I'm sorry....did you say Brian?" she asked, finally smiling.

"Yeah, I met Izzy at....."

"...the museum," they finished together.

Brian was grateful of the dim lighting as he felt himself redden, all the while feeling a little pleased that Izzy obviously had thought enough of him to mention it to her friend. 

"Ok sweetheart, let's get some of this inside you," he murmured, placing the bottle in her hand, ensuring she had a good grip on it whilst she drank. 

He took another quick glimpse at Amber, who seemed to be calling for a cab. Turning his attention back to Izzy, Brian gently tucked her hair behind her ear, wondering just what had happened to get her into such a state. Izzy opened her eyes and gave a cute drunken smile. 

"Th...thank you," she whispered with a hiccup.

"Just returning the favor," Brian replied, returning the smile as Izzy laughed softly.

"Ok, cab'll be here in five," Amber stated with relief. 

Izzy seemed to perk up a little at the sound of her friend's voice.

"Amber.....it's Brian," she whispered, stifling a yawn.

"I know sweetie."

Brian gently rubbed Izzy's back, her eyes closing at the gesture. 

"She's gonna be asleep any minute, I'll help you get her home," Brian offered.

"No...well, are you sure?" 

"You gonna be able to get her inside like this?" he asked smirking. "Ok Izzy, let's get you outside," he whispered, managing to get her to wrap herself round him as he stood up, silently thankful she was so light. 

As Brian carried her through the bar to the door, Izzy snuggled into his shoulder with a sigh.

"Told you he was pretty Ambs," she whispered, drifting off to sleep.