Planet
11 - Give Me A Chance To Be That Person I Want To Be
Alexandria's POV
After Jeremy left to go back home and back to work, things have been getting more awkward between Zacky and I. I mean it isn't awkward for me that he is living under my roof taking care of me. I don't even know why it is so awkward.
The past few days was spend with Zacky showing me some recent pictures. Some of them, or most of them have pictures a happy couple in it. That happy couple was Zacky and I. I sighed looking at these pictures. It made me feel so guilty that I can't do anything to help this situation. I still can't remember a thing.
"Hey, dinner's ready." Zacky said, coming into the living room in an apron. He looked very adorable.
"Alright. After you." I said, following him into the kitchen where plates of lasagna was made.
"Wow, that's very nice and good" I told Zacky as I took a bite of his food.
"Chef Baker in the kitchen." He said proudly.
We continued to eat in silence, constantly making small talk until I take a breath of courage and ask him,
"I saw so many pictures of us," he frowned, "can you tell me things between you and...I?"
"Why do you want me to?" He asked with an expression of hurt in his face. He knew that this will sparked up the unhappiness that is hidden behind himself.
"Because," i reasoned, "I wanted to remember you. I don't want things to be so awkward. I am pretty sure you and I both wanted to go back to normal. I am trying to remember shit that I am suppose to. I just can't."
After my little reply, Zacky began telling me about US. We were almost love at first sight since we went on a 'lunch date' on the first day that I was working in the new studio. We went on another date another night which ended with him bringing me to the beach. It went on and on.
I can see Zacky was explaining all sorts of events with a sad smile. I knew it's hard for him. I just wanted to do something right and something that will make both of us happy.
At the end of his explaination, I can see some tears stinging in his eyes.
"Please don't cry, Zacky." I said, approaching him from the opposite side of the table.
"I am trying. It's just... just very hard for me to say all this to the woman I love. You remembered nothing and I know you are trying so hard to but it hurts a lot." He said as a tear began to fall. I never wanted to see anyone cry.
I don't know what to do but I did my best to comfort him. I pulled him into a hug. We stayed in it for a while until he stopped crying. Seeing Zacky cry breaks my heart. This man did nothing wrong to deserve a horrible woman like me. He is too good for me.
I released him finally, and cupped his face.
"Please Zacky. I am sorry. But we can work this together."
"I know. I am sorry too. I was just a bit emotional. That's all." He said, staring into my brown eyes with his green ones. They are beautiful.
The intense stare soon broke as he lean forward me. I can see he wanted to kiss me and so do I. But i just can't.
I pulled away.
"I am sorry. I just... just can't." I said, running up to my bedroom.
Once the door were closed, i thought to myself, why can't I kissed him? Why? I used to love him and I can love him now too.
I was having some thoughtful thinking before Zacky started knocking on the door, turning the lock doorknob.
"Alexandria, open up." He yelled.
"No." I told him. I don't want to face this situation.
"Please. I need to talk to you."
"No." I replied again.
"Alexandria, don't shut yourself off with me. Please."
I didn't replied but I walked towards the door and unlock it. Pulling the door open, I invited Zacky in my room.
"What?" I asked, not intenting it to be as harsh as it sound.
"I am sorry for that... downstairs." He said nervously.
"It's...it's alright, i guess."
"We are cool right?"
"Definitely."
"But, can I ask why you pulled back?" Darn it. That question has popped up.
"I... i just can't for some reason. I tried. I just, am not ready for it... I guess."
"Oh...oh it's alright." He said before wishing me a good night and leaving the room.
Good night my ass.
After Jeremy left to go back home and back to work, things have been getting more awkward between Zacky and I. I mean it isn't awkward for me that he is living under my roof taking care of me. I don't even know why it is so awkward.
The past few days was spend with Zacky showing me some recent pictures. Some of them, or most of them have pictures a happy couple in it. That happy couple was Zacky and I. I sighed looking at these pictures. It made me feel so guilty that I can't do anything to help this situation. I still can't remember a thing.
"Hey, dinner's ready." Zacky said, coming into the living room in an apron. He looked very adorable.
"Alright. After you." I said, following him into the kitchen where plates of lasagna was made.
"Wow, that's very nice and good" I told Zacky as I took a bite of his food.
"Chef Baker in the kitchen." He said proudly.
We continued to eat in silence, constantly making small talk until I take a breath of courage and ask him,
"I saw so many pictures of us," he frowned, "can you tell me things between you and...I?"
"Why do you want me to?" He asked with an expression of hurt in his face. He knew that this will sparked up the unhappiness that is hidden behind himself.
"Because," i reasoned, "I wanted to remember you. I don't want things to be so awkward. I am pretty sure you and I both wanted to go back to normal. I am trying to remember shit that I am suppose to. I just can't."
After my little reply, Zacky began telling me about US. We were almost love at first sight since we went on a 'lunch date' on the first day that I was working in the new studio. We went on another date another night which ended with him bringing me to the beach. It went on and on.
I can see Zacky was explaining all sorts of events with a sad smile. I knew it's hard for him. I just wanted to do something right and something that will make both of us happy.
At the end of his explaination, I can see some tears stinging in his eyes.
"Please don't cry, Zacky." I said, approaching him from the opposite side of the table.
"I am trying. It's just... just very hard for me to say all this to the woman I love. You remembered nothing and I know you are trying so hard to but it hurts a lot." He said as a tear began to fall. I never wanted to see anyone cry.
I don't know what to do but I did my best to comfort him. I pulled him into a hug. We stayed in it for a while until he stopped crying. Seeing Zacky cry breaks my heart. This man did nothing wrong to deserve a horrible woman like me. He is too good for me.
I released him finally, and cupped his face.
"Please Zacky. I am sorry. But we can work this together."
"I know. I am sorry too. I was just a bit emotional. That's all." He said, staring into my brown eyes with his green ones. They are beautiful.
The intense stare soon broke as he lean forward me. I can see he wanted to kiss me and so do I. But i just can't.
I pulled away.
"I am sorry. I just... just can't." I said, running up to my bedroom.
Once the door were closed, i thought to myself, why can't I kissed him? Why? I used to love him and I can love him now too.
I was having some thoughtful thinking before Zacky started knocking on the door, turning the lock doorknob.
"Alexandria, open up." He yelled.
"No." I told him. I don't want to face this situation.
"Please. I need to talk to you."
"No." I replied again.
"Alexandria, don't shut yourself off with me. Please."
I didn't replied but I walked towards the door and unlock it. Pulling the door open, I invited Zacky in my room.
"What?" I asked, not intenting it to be as harsh as it sound.
"I am sorry for that... downstairs." He said nervously.
"It's...it's alright, i guess."
"We are cool right?"
"Definitely."
"But, can I ask why you pulled back?" Darn it. That question has popped up.
"I... i just can't for some reason. I tried. I just, am not ready for it... I guess."
"Oh...oh it's alright." He said before wishing me a good night and leaving the room.
Good night my ass.
can't wait to read the sequel :)
9/28/13