Payden

,,,

I didn’t know what to say, so I just stood there; quiet, as he looked down at me. He looked at me as if he were expecting me to say something, but I had nothing to say, but I had so much to say at the same time. All of his emotions were readable in his eyes. He was scared, anxious, unsure, and at the same time, there was a hint of rejection.

“I-I’m sorry,” he stuttered, “I shouldn’t have done that to you…but it’s okay, I get it,” he said, and his hands fell from my shoulders, and he turned, and started walking out of the door. He didn’t look back as he took the left to his room, and I could hear his door close. I was in a state of shock, I figured out. Too shocked to move, too shocked to stop him from leaving my room. I just left him hanging there as he confessed that he was in love with me. I heard his door open again, hoping he was coming back to my room, but he didn’t even look at me as he passed my door, and then I heard the front door opening and closing. And then I was running. Running to tell him that I felt the exact same way. That I loved being by him as much as possible, and how much the kiss he had just gave me meant.

“BRIAN,” I yelled as I flung the front door open, and ran out of the apartment, just in time to see him leaving the small parking lot in his black SUV. My heart was racing like I had just majorly fucked up, and it really felt like I did. I needed to get dressed and go to Saleigh’s. I had to talk to her. I know that as soon as I tell her what I want to tell Brian, she’ll jump up, shouting that she knew it, then act as if she were grossed out. But she’s my best friend, she really listens to me as much as she acts like she doesn’t. I slumped my shoulders, and walked back to my room, where I pulled on a pair of denim shorts, and a Cranberries t-shirt, followed by my worn out Converse. I pulled my hair into a sloppy bun, and I was out of the apartment, on my way to Saleigh’s house.

I didn’t hesitate to stroll into the house without knocking, to find her sprawled out on the couch watching Duck Dynasty in her pajamas, obvious that the only movement she had made at all today was from her bed to the couch. I stopped at the end of the couch, staring at her, and she moved her head to look at me.

“Don’t strain yourself too much there, Skrillex” I muttered, just loud enough for her to hear me, and she gave me the stink eye. It was probably for the reminder that she had to have the side of her head shaved in a surgery after she fucked up her head.

“I can’t help it that a duck call company operated by a bunch of rednecks is so fucking entertaining,” she defended, and my palm went to my forehead.

“I blame Sheldon for the redneck in your blood,” I moaned as I mentioned her father, and I could heard her laughing as she sat up on the couch, making enough room for me to sit next to her.

“It is his fault. It’s all Sheldon’s fault,” she agreed with me. She called both her parents by their names, since she was too embarrassed to be related to them, much less be their child, “and since I was their only kid, I got all of the redneck, that jackass.” I couldn’t stop myself as I laughed until my sides hurt, and when I did finally stop, I looked up to see Saleigh looking at me like maybe, just maybe, I had finally officially gone insane.

“Sorry, I needed that,” I forced a cough and sat back against the couch, the comfort making the pain in my sides and stomach stop.

“Why? What’s wrong,” she asked, concern forming in her voice, and concern on her face as her eyebrows furrowed together.

“You’re not going to believe this, but at the same time, you’ll have known it all along,” I told her, and a smile crawled onto her face.

“If I’ve known it all along, that means this will be good,” her smile got very creepy, very fast.

“Well, Brian kissed me and confessed his undying love for me,” I told her, and she started nodding to herself.

“Yep, I knew it, and you love him back,” she said, not as a question, but as a fact.

“Well….yeah,” I confirmed.

“So then what’s the problem? You, like me, see how utterly GROSS this is?” she said, acting exactly how I knew she would.

“No, because I don’t think it’s gross, but when he told me, I kind of fell into shock, and I didn’t say anything, and he stormed out of the house. I ran after him, but he was gone by the time I got to the front door,” I said, and she shook her head, “don’t shake your head at me. I know I messed up,” I crossed my arms and looked the other way.

“I’m not shaking my head about that, but you do know where he most likely went, though, right?” she asked, and my head turned back to her. I had always been close with Brian, and all the guy, but I tended to stay away from their love life, except Zacky when he started dating Saleigh because she was my best friend, and I wanted to make sure he wouldn’t hurt her, but Zacky and Brian used to hang out with each other every second of every day, so Saleigh would know almost everything about Brian.

“I don’t,” I shook my head slightly.

“He went to the bar, and is probably working on picking up a chick right now,” she said sadly, and I didn’t believe it.

“He wouldn’t,” I denied.

“Oh, he would, and he probably is.”

,,,

Brian

,,,

“So if you don’t live here, where are you from,” I said into the girl’s ear. She wasn’t exactly attractive, and I don’t quite remember her name; I hadn’t been listening to her, I just wanted to get back at Payden. I wasn’t really sure for what, though. I think it was the fact that after what I told her, she just stood there, staring at me, not saying anything. I’ve never felt more dumb in my life. That’s what I wanted to get back at her for…making me look like a complete idiot. The girl answered, but I didn’t hear what she said, I was too caught up in my own thoughts, and to be honest, I was a bit tipsy.

“That’s a nice place,” I said as I noticed she was done talking.

“It’s the murder capitol of America,” she giggled, and I nodded, forcing a smirk on my face even though I wasn’t happy or playful.

“Oh, that’s bad,” I revised my last sentence, and she smiled, and looked at my lips hungrily as she licked hers. I leaned in, planting a very harsh kiss on hers, though it wasn’t anything like kissing Payden, but this girl kissed me back. She wanted me, there was no doubt. I pulled back and looked at her with fake lust in my eyes, “so what do you say we head back to my place,” I suggested, and she smiled shyly and shook her head. I placed a twenty dollar bill down on the counter for the bartender, and grabbed the girl’s hand, leading her to my car. I didn’t open the door for her, I assumed she was smart enough to know how to operate a car door.

I drove us back to my apartment, hoping Payden was there to see the piece of ass I brought back, hope she would hear the moans of pleasure and the headboard hitting the wall. Hoping she’d have this lie in her head that I didn’t give a fuck about her, so that she would feel just as stupid as I did. I opened the front door, looking back to see the girl closing it behind her. If this were a girl I was actually interested in, I’d be playing Prince Charming, but I really wanted nothing to do with her.

I only wanted Payden.

I’d think of her this whole time, thinking about how I was getting back on her, how amused I’d be with the look on her face as she saw this random girl leave the house with her hair and clothes messed up. I started kissing the girl again once we were on my bed, and I started to remove her top when I heard my door open, and Payden stopping halfway through saying my name. I looked up, and she was gone, and so was I.

..::Payden’s P.O.V::..

I wanted to tell him how I felt. How much I really loved him. I wanted to tell him that, until I saw him on top of another girl. Saleigh had been right, and I had been stupid.

“PAYDEN,” I heard him call my name as he chased after me. I wanted him to go away as I quickly walked back to Saleigh’s house, “PAYDEN, STOP,” he called, this time, he was in front of me again, he hands on my shoulders as he forced me to stop walking. I didn’t even care to wipe the tears from my eyes.

“It’s funny,” I forced a laugh. A sadistic and sarcastic laugh, “It’s funny how I was coming to tell you I felt the exact same way,” I said, and pushed him away as he tried to hug me, the word sorry a third way out of his mouth. I walked around him.

“Payden,” he tried to stop me again, and I pulled myself from his grasp.

“We’ll talk about this tomorrow,” I said without looking back at him, and continuing to Saleigh’s. I wasn’t going to go in her house crying, so I made myself stop before I walked back into her house, acting calm. I didn’t say anything as I felt hers and Zacky’s eyes on me, I just walked to the guest bedroom, and sat on the bed. Last time I was here, I was in the exact same state; trying my hardest to not cry out every liquid in my body. The door opened, and closed, revealing Saleigh as she walked over to me.

“He did it, didn’t he,” she was sitting down next to me, staring at the same wall I was.

“Yep,” I nodded my head, “He was w-working on the shirt when I went to talk to him,” I said, talking was very efficiently pulling tears out of my eyes.

“I don’t want to sound like I’m defending him, but you and I both know he’s a great guy…but that’s what he’s always done when he’s felt rejected. On to the next one,” she said, sounding apologetic.

“The thing about that is he came after me,” I said, my head falling into my hands.

“Then he was probably trying to get back at you in his own little way. What’d you say to him?” She asked.

“That I’d talk to him tomorrow,” I had no emotion in my voice as I told her, probably because I was looking forward to the talk and dreading it all at the same time.

“Well as you know already, you’re welcome to stay here. Zacky brought back food, so there’s some left in the fridge if you get hungry, or want anything else. You already know this is a home to you,” she said, and I nodded.

“I’ll come out later and hang out with you two,” I said, smiling up at her, “and thanks.”

“It’s never a problem. You’re the only person that understand I need to watch my redneck shows or I go full on redneck, so you watch them without complaining,” she said, and I nodded.

“We wouldn’t want you talking like you come from Alabama or something, would we?” I joked, and she got an annoyed look on her face.

“I’m from Alabama,” she said shortly, and I laughed.

“I know,” I said, and she left the room, “REBELS FOR LIFE,” I called after her.

“FUCK YOU,” I heard her call back. I went to take a shower, since I hadn’t taken one, and went to the closet, where she had a box of some of my clothes, just in case. I pulled them on, and joined her in watching another one of her weird television shows that nobody else finds amusing.

©Shannon.

Notes

If you ever call Saleigh a redneck, that will be the ONLY time you call Saleigh a redneck.

xoxo, Shannon.