Disgrace.
Do not forget what we cannot forgive.
I guess you can say it all began when my mom married John Baker, his son Zachary, or Zacky as we all call him, became my step brother. From the beginning I found him scary from the first time I met him. He had this look in his eyes that told me to stay out of his way or get hurt. I always did my best to keep out of his way. But it was hard when my mom and john made him take care of me when they went out.
I was 16 when he first started to abuse me. At first he just touched me and such, but I feel soon that won’t satisfy him enough. Soon he’ll do the unspeakable, as mom calls it when we see something on the TV about a young girl who has been raped. I know soon enough I’ll join the girls you hear about in the news or read about in the newspapers. Only my story is never going to be told.
I gulp lying in my bed trying to sleep, but bad feelings won’t leave my gut. Mom and John aren’t home, leaving Zacky to take care of me. Sometimes I wish I was brave enough to beg them not go and tell them everything, but I take a threat serious.
I hear footsteps walking down the hall towards my door and close my eyes tightly hoping he’s just going downstairs. The footsteps stop outside my door and I hear someone pull the door handle down and open the door. I try to stay calm and pretend I’m sleeping as the person walk inside my room closing the door. Zacky laughs slightly standing at the edge of my bed.
“Oh we can play that game Rai,” he tells me, knowing I’m not sleeping. I still keep my eyes shot tightly just waiting for him to do what he came to do. I jump slightly as his hand touch my leg caressing it slightly, I look up at him.
“P-please s-stop Zacky,” I whimper slightly. He just laughs it off and moves his hand up between my tights, I whimper but don’t move. Earlier experience has taught me not to. He looks down at me then crashed his lips against my biting my lip so I open my mouth. He then forces his tongue into my mouth. After a while he pulls away then pulls off the t-shirt I’m wearing, smirking when he sees that I’m not wearing any bra. I cover my breasts looking away from him, bad idea. He then attaches his lips to my neck sucking and biting. I gasp slightly getting tears in my eyes.
“Z-Zacky s-stop!” I cry out, but he doesn’t. He then pulls off my PJ pants and underwear. I keep my watering eyes on him as he gets up pulling his own clothes off showing me his throbbing member, I whimper wondering how it’s ever going to fit inside of me. He doesn’t wonder, he never wondered. He just got on the top of me and trusted inside of me, I gasp loudly getting more tears in my eyes. The pain is so unbearable and I felt like screaming, but I didn’t. He taught me once not to do that. He didn’t give me any time to adjust to his size as he started thrusting into me faster and harder. I never screamed, I never cried out loud. I only winced and sobbed. He groans loudly spilling his cum inside of me then pulls out of me roll down on the side of me, trying to catch his breath. When he did he just got up and put his clothes back on then left my room. I stayed in my bed, broken and in pain, crying slightly till sleep finally overcome me.
__
Do not forget what we cannot forgive
The following 9 months was nothing more than a nightmare. Just 2 months after that horrible night I found out I was expecting a child. I never told my mom or John. They found out when the bump was showing and there was nothing they could do about it. Zacky never came to my room after that night; I think he actually regretted it. We never uttered a word to each other after my mom and his dad found out that I was having a child, but it was really nothing new. He and I never really spoke to each other.
My mom tried to get me to agree to adopt the child away, but I couldn’t do that. It was my child, it is my child. A cold November evening I gave birth to mine and Zacky’s child, I named him William, William Martin Baker. Mom just thought I let my child get John’s last name, since I never knew my real dad and she took John’s last name when she married him. She never knew that it was because Zacky is the father to William. Maybe someday she will, when she looks into William's face seeing how much he looks like his father.
After I gave birth to William, I moved out from home getting a little nice apartment away from Huntington Beach, California. I got a job at a restaurant as a dishwasher. I was only 18. I was too young to be a mother, but it wasn’t my decision. It’s was his, Zacky’s, when he decided to take my virginity. I just learned to live with the consequences of his action, and I love my son senseless. He’s the cutest little boy I’ve ever seen. But every day when I put William to sleep and kiss him goodnight I wonder. I wonder if he regrets what he did to me, and I wonder if he’ll ever get the guts to look his son in the face.
I was 16 when he first started to abuse me. At first he just touched me and such, but I feel soon that won’t satisfy him enough. Soon he’ll do the unspeakable, as mom calls it when we see something on the TV about a young girl who has been raped. I know soon enough I’ll join the girls you hear about in the news or read about in the newspapers. Only my story is never going to be told.
I gulp lying in my bed trying to sleep, but bad feelings won’t leave my gut. Mom and John aren’t home, leaving Zacky to take care of me. Sometimes I wish I was brave enough to beg them not go and tell them everything, but I take a threat serious.
I hear footsteps walking down the hall towards my door and close my eyes tightly hoping he’s just going downstairs. The footsteps stop outside my door and I hear someone pull the door handle down and open the door. I try to stay calm and pretend I’m sleeping as the person walk inside my room closing the door. Zacky laughs slightly standing at the edge of my bed.
“Oh we can play that game Rai,” he tells me, knowing I’m not sleeping. I still keep my eyes shot tightly just waiting for him to do what he came to do. I jump slightly as his hand touch my leg caressing it slightly, I look up at him.
“P-please s-stop Zacky,” I whimper slightly. He just laughs it off and moves his hand up between my tights, I whimper but don’t move. Earlier experience has taught me not to. He looks down at me then crashed his lips against my biting my lip so I open my mouth. He then forces his tongue into my mouth. After a while he pulls away then pulls off the t-shirt I’m wearing, smirking when he sees that I’m not wearing any bra. I cover my breasts looking away from him, bad idea. He then attaches his lips to my neck sucking and biting. I gasp slightly getting tears in my eyes.
“Z-Zacky s-stop!” I cry out, but he doesn’t. He then pulls off my PJ pants and underwear. I keep my watering eyes on him as he gets up pulling his own clothes off showing me his throbbing member, I whimper wondering how it’s ever going to fit inside of me. He doesn’t wonder, he never wondered. He just got on the top of me and trusted inside of me, I gasp loudly getting more tears in my eyes. The pain is so unbearable and I felt like screaming, but I didn’t. He taught me once not to do that. He didn’t give me any time to adjust to his size as he started thrusting into me faster and harder. I never screamed, I never cried out loud. I only winced and sobbed. He groans loudly spilling his cum inside of me then pulls out of me roll down on the side of me, trying to catch his breath. When he did he just got up and put his clothes back on then left my room. I stayed in my bed, broken and in pain, crying slightly till sleep finally overcome me.
__
Do not forget what we cannot forgive
The following 9 months was nothing more than a nightmare. Just 2 months after that horrible night I found out I was expecting a child. I never told my mom or John. They found out when the bump was showing and there was nothing they could do about it. Zacky never came to my room after that night; I think he actually regretted it. We never uttered a word to each other after my mom and his dad found out that I was having a child, but it was really nothing new. He and I never really spoke to each other.
My mom tried to get me to agree to adopt the child away, but I couldn’t do that. It was my child, it is my child. A cold November evening I gave birth to mine and Zacky’s child, I named him William, William Martin Baker. Mom just thought I let my child get John’s last name, since I never knew my real dad and she took John’s last name when she married him. She never knew that it was because Zacky is the father to William. Maybe someday she will, when she looks into William's face seeing how much he looks like his father.
After I gave birth to William, I moved out from home getting a little nice apartment away from Huntington Beach, California. I got a job at a restaurant as a dishwasher. I was only 18. I was too young to be a mother, but it wasn’t my decision. It’s was his, Zacky’s, when he decided to take my virginity. I just learned to live with the consequences of his action, and I love my son senseless. He’s the cutest little boy I’ve ever seen. But every day when I put William to sleep and kiss him goodnight I wonder. I wonder if he regrets what he did to me, and I wonder if he’ll ever get the guts to look his son in the face.
Notes
a oneshot I wrote for some contests.it won 3rd place in one and honorable mention in another, I'm very proud of the work I did, even though I'm not to keen on writting fanfictions like this one, but I hope you will like it :)
11/26/12